


Blue and White

by Qayin



Category: Megamind (2010)
Genre: Alien Cultural Differences, Alien Gender/Sexuality, F/M, M/M, Megamind and Metro Man turn out to be the same species, Multi, Polyamory, Pre-Movie
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-09-10
Updated: 2021-01-28
Packaged: 2021-03-06 16:53:32
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 15
Words: 53,660
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26392204
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Qayin/pseuds/Qayin
Summary: During a fight between Metro Man, Megamind and the Doom Syndicate, something transpires between Metro Man and Megamind that starts to change their relationship. They have always been rivals, but maybe they have more in common than they realise.
Relationships: Megamind/Metro Man, Megamind/Metro Man/Roxanne Ritchi, Megamind/Roxanne Ritchi
Comments: 153
Kudos: 225





	1. time out?

**Author's Note:**

  * For [AwfulLawful](https://archiveofourown.org/users/AwfulLawful/gifts).
  * Inspired by [Isthmus](https://archiveofourown.org/works/15330669) by [AwfulLawful](https://archiveofourown.org/users/AwfulLawful/pseuds/AwfulLawful). 



> I was inspired by AwfulLawful's Isthmus (currently ten chapters) and I couldn't help myself. They're the one who came up with the idea, and I hope they don't take offence that I tried to make my own spin on it. Please read Isthmus! It's really good and AwfulLawful have obviously spent a lot of time researching biology and reproduction.

There was a moment of silence, a calm before the storm, then all hell broke loose. Megamind was launched into the air, the mecha-suit falling apart around him. Metro Man didn’t mean to hit that hard, but the fight was a little more brutal than usual and Metro Man was tired — not physically, but mentally. He was exhausted, worn down to the bone. 

For months, if not even years if Metro Man was honest with himself, the responsibility of keeping Metro City out of harms way had grained on him. There was a constant need for Metro Man, saving lives, putting out fires, helping little old ladies crossing the streets. And between moments when the need for Metro Man calmed down just a little, there was a need for Wayne — or rather, a need for a Scott to fund business-schemes and host socialite-events. 

Metro Man was the most powerful man on earth, but he felt like he was drowning under a constant need for his attention, all the fucking time. And even though the Game usually could cheer him up, today not even Megamind was cutting it. 

To start, he didn’t even have Megamind’s full attention. It wasn’t  _ unusual _ , Metro Man supposed. Megamind processed thoughts and his surrounding at a much more rapid pace than anyone else, Metro Man included, and Megamind  _ often _ noticed and paid attention to way more than just Metro Man in a fight. 

First things first, Megamind always had some semblance of understanding where Minion was in the scheme of things — where to shoot to never accidentally hurt his friend, or where to go to draw the fire away from his henchman. Secondly, Megamind took notice of who watched. The Game was all about showmanship, after all, and it would not do to have the audience injured. Injured humans couldn’t pay as much attention as uninjured, so Megamind always had some attention to the bystanderds around them. If there was a terrible danger either a brain-bot, or sometimes even Megamind himself, would shove the audience back out of harms way. Metro Man had seen it with his own eyes, actions Megamind took that was just too deliberate to be unintentional. 

Like one time, when Metro Man in the heat of the battle had shot out his laser, and instead of reaching its target, had it bounce and sliced through a very large statue of Metro Man. The giant marble head of Metro Man had begun to fall. Metro Man had leaped to save the people underneath at the same time as Megamind, who was closer had twisted towards the damage, leaped under the rubble and shot a laser of his own with the De-gun into the air. When the marble dust finally cleared Metro Man could see Megamind, De-gun raised over his head, shielding the pregnant woman that had been at the centre of it all. The De-gun had sliced through the falling head and split it into several, smaller, painful but survivable pieces, and Megamind had used his own body to keep as much of the debris away from the woman. Later on in that battle Metro Man had seen the woman in the corner of his eye, accepting a bottle of water from a brain-bot while two other were hoovering protectively around her. 

Thirdly, Megamind paid attention to Roxanne Ritchi. If she was involved in the Game, at least a large portion of Megamind’s attention was on her. The banter was for her sake as much as it was for their own sake, and occasionally the battle had to take a short break in order for Megamind to show, explain or fill Roxanne in on what was going on. Megamind called this his villainous monologuing, and an important part of the game. Metro Man was pretty sure Megamind was just trying to impress her. Megamind adored being impressed upon, especially by people Megamind himself found impressive. There were a lot of impressive things about Roxanne Ritchi, and truth be told, Metro Man also liked to get some things explained to  _ him. _ Megamind was… Megamind was often impressive, but just as often he was just as comical. 

Wayne had, on a few and rare late nights at Roxanne’s place, breached the subject of Megamind’s potential. Sometimes Metro Man saw a gleam in those green eyes of Megamind’s, and he knew that the super villain could cause serious damage if he set his mind to it. It sounded silly to say, because Megamind was Metro City’s grade-a super-villain. Megamind basically owned the criminal empire in Metro City — by all accounts, Megamind was, and always had been, dangerous. But, Wayne also felt as if he could be  _ more _ dangerous, if he wanted. He could be more ruthless than he was, if something really pushed him to it. Wayne had never said this to anyone else, but alone out on Roxanne’s balcony in the dwindling light, it felt right to say it. Roxanne had been quiet for some time as she thought it over. Wayne could see through the dark with ease, and could tell she had a thoughtful expression on her face. Eventually she had just nodded and agreed. 

“Yes, I think so too.” she had said and somehow that had made Wayne feel both reassured and frightened. As an unspoken agreement between them both had decided that they didn’t really want to see what Megamind  _ could _ release at them if he ever got the right motivation for it. 

But the fight between them today wasn’t usual. Megamind’s attention on all the things Metro Man had listed above he could deal with, but today Megamind was fighting more than one battle and it had spread that impressive attention a little thin. 

Megamind was playing the Game, but he was also fighting the Doom Syndicate. Metro Man had first thought it was a joined effort between the Doom Syndicate and Megamind to take him down, but after a while he realized it was a joined effort of the Doom Syndicate to take  _ Megamind _ down. Sure, they fought Metro Man when he crossed their path, but they constantly slithered away to refocus their attacks on Megamind. 

Megamind had one hell of a time, by the looks of it. He was bantering as if it was all just a regular Tuesday, first with Lady Doppler, then Metro Man, then Psycho Delic. Minion and Roxanne had withdrawn to a further distance away, keeping a close watch. At least Metro Man didn’t have to worry about hurting them that way, so he wasn’t complaining. 

The battle was long and Metro Man was growing more and more tired. Hot Flash had just fired her powers straight into Megamind’s mecha-suit; which didn’t seem to cause the blue man any problems other than that he apparently found it incredibly rude. 

“Really, of all the things,” said Megamind in an incredulous tone of voice, “frying the backup generator?! Have you no respect for the code?” 

Metro Man punched Construction Worker through a wall and turned to look at Megamind and Hot Flash. For one second, Wayne will admit he lost his cool. Megamind was monologuing through a speech about how Evil had to stick together for the good of bad, Hot Flash tried to fry him again and Psycho Delic was closing up. 

Metro Man — well, Metro Man growled, a deep, rumbling sound that made the windows tremble from the shock-waves of it. Megamind froze, only for a second, but Metro Man was already flying towards him at a high speed. 

As if on instinct Megamind turned, his huge, green eyes frantically trying to see the threat. They locked eyes and Wayne could see true fear strike Megamind’s face. Then, Metro Man was by them, knocked Psycho Delic out of the way without caring how many bones he broke. 

‘Are you paying attention to me now?’ his mind screamed. Metro Man raised his fist. Megamind tried to jump out of the way, but he seemed strangely frozen, and then Metro Man’s fist connected to the metal of Megamind’s suit, and the suit, along with Megamind, went flying. 

Everyone just stared in shock. Even Wayne was shocked. Metro Man never hit like that. Megamind was launched high into the air, the suit falling all around him. For a moment Wayne was struck with how sharp Megamind’s features were against the pale blue sky, his darker blue skin standing out against Earth’s mellow skyline. Adrenaline was coursing through Megamind’s veins, Metro Man knew. He could smell it and see the result of it; Megamind’s cheeks turning bright fuchsia as he sailed through the air. 

Megamind was scrambling for some way to rescue himself, Metro Man knew. For a brief second, Wayne wondered what would happen when the blue man hit the ground. 

“No!” Roxanne and Minion screamed in the distance. 

Megamind’s fingers barely grazed the De-gun, which would have been a brilliant plan. Megamind was falling and in his current state he would splatter when he hit the pavement, but if he dehydrated himself that little cube would fall unharmed to the ground, bounce a few times and then Minion or Metro Man could pick him up, revive him and either bring him back to the lair or back to jail. 

But the De-gun was just beyond his reach and Metro Man saw as it just grazed his fingertips and fell away from him. Megamind made an involuntary sound, deep in his throat, a desperate and automatic plea for help. 

The sound reached Metro Man, and he had never felt more alive. Metro Man shot into the air, flying faster than he had ever done before. Wayne caught him right in the nick of time, and Megamind gasped, both in relief and pain, because even though Metro Man tried, it still felt like being hit by a truck. 

Megamind clung to his rescue instinctively, and feeling the other man grip his super-suit made Metro Man growl again. Megamind became stiff in his arms. Metro Man flew them off, leaving the battleground with villains and innocents alike. He didn’t even care what happened to Roxanne in that moment. 

In a flash Metro Man and Megamind had reached the abandoned observatory, and Metro Man planted his feet firmly on the floor inside the dome. Megamind was in a lock between his arms, and Metro Man stood still for a moment, his blood roaring in his ears and Megamind’s struggles to get free making his skin tingle and burn pleasantly. 

He didn’t want to let the other man go, he realized dully. 

Megamind hissed in a thoroughly inhuman way and Metro Man squeezed him tighter. “Wayne, you’re hurting me.” 

Megamind never used his real name unless he absolutely had to. The thought shook Metro Man out of his stupor and ungracefully he let go. Megamind dropped to the floor and hissed in pain.

Metro Man scanned his body with his x-ray vision immediately. Megamind had a sprained ankle and had definitely hurt his shoulder somehow. Wayne realized with a start that  _ he _ was the cause of it, when he had slammed into Megamind with such high speed without being careful. 

“Are you alright?” he asked, torn between wanting to run away and go closer again. 

“No, you idiot.” hissed Megamind and examined his shoulder. 

“It’s not broken.” said Metro Man. 

“I can feel that,” said Megamind annoyed. “It’s just sore because it was mauled by a bloody goody-two-shoes that can’t stay in his own fucking lane.” 

Megamind shot Wayne a dirty look, then took in his surroundings. 

“The observatory?” he demanded. “Take me back, right now.” 

He tried to stand up, realized the sprain was pretty bad and still pushed up. Metro Man saw how he heavily favoured the other leg when he got up, and how his shoulder hung pretty limp along his side. Perhaps it was completely dislocated and needed to be set again. 

“No,” said Metro Man decisively. He didn’t think a battle with the Doom Syndicate was wise now in Megamind’s condition. 

“No?” Echoed Megamind, fury spreading over his face. “Oh, you will, Metro Mahn! You brought me here, which is totally unprofessional, might I add — and then you have the gall to say no?” Megamind shook his head with narrowed eyes. “Of all the stubborn, annoying things — you bring me right back or I’ll — I’ll…” 

Megamind grew silent, seemed to consider just what he’d do, realized he wasn’t in a condition to fight Metro Man right now. A triumphant flash of green crossed his eyes just as he defiantly raised his chin against him. 

“I’ll go to the police.” he said. 

“What?” said Metro Man. 

“I have been kidnapped, brought here against my will,” explained Megamind with a sudden gleeful excitement. “This isn’t jail, Metro Mahn. This isn’t how you play the Game.” 

Wayne didn’t say anything. Megamind was right. The Game was clear, there were rules. Metro Man didn’t pick Megamind up for just about anything, Megamind actually had to start something for that. They fought, Megamind made threats and showed off his inventions, and then Metro Man won and took the villain back to jail. 

Metro Man had just reacted after he picked the other alien up. He had flown somewhere away from the fight, but not to where the rules clearly stated they had to go to. Metro Man had broken the unspoken rules of the Game, which meant… yes, technically he had abducted Megamind and was keeping him against his will. 

“Look, Buddy,” he started. Megamind glared daggers at him until he raised his hands in surrender. “ _ Megamind _ . I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to hit you like that.” 

“I know that.” said Megamind matter-of-factly and frowned. “Is that why you’ve kidnapped me, to make sure in some misguided way that I know you didn’t  _ mean  _ to launch me into the fucking stratosphere?” 

“It wasn’t the stratosphere,” Metro Man grumbled. It wasn’t nearly high enough to be the stratosphere. 

“Oh, really?” snapped Megamind. “Could have fooled me, I could practically taste the ozone layer.” 

“Sorry,” said Metro Man sheepishly. The more he thought about it, the stranger he felt. He knew he hadn’t meant to hit Megamind like that, and he hadn’t actually meant to fly him away from the battle. Usually he would have just caught the other man and carefully dropped him out of harms way while he dealt with the Doom Syndicate. The Observatory wasn’t part of any plan, except that at the time it felt strangely suitable. Safe. It was certainly far away enough from any remaining battle, at least. 

Megamind was silent for a moment, then he sighed and rubbed his temple. Metro Man wondered if he had accidentally given the other a concussion as well. 

“Yes, yes,” said Megamind, kind of encouraging. “We both know you didn’t mean to, yadda-yadda, you were only trying to do  _ good _ .” 

The last part was hissed in that inhuman way again and Wayne tensed at the sound of it. Megamind at least remained oblivious to the fact. 

“Now, will you,  _ please _ , take me back so I can teach the Doom Syndicate that I may go flying for Metro Mahn, but I’m still firmly planted above  _ them _ in the pecking order?” His voice was strained, like he was talking to a child and was trying to keep himself from swearing. 

Metro Man considered it. He turned his vision towards the battle, but since the stars of the show had disappeared and the common enemies were gone a fight had broken out between the Doom Syndicates’ members. The brain-bots were in the process of clearing out civilians and Minion had taken Roxanne somewhere safe. Slowly he shook his head. 

“No.” He didn’t want to. Megamind was losing his patience. 

“I assure you, old friend, that I will not be as graceful as Miss Ritchi as a hostage,” he said menacingly. There was that low growl again in the back of his throat. Metro Man flew towards him. 

Megamind leaped backwards, trying to scamper as far away as he could, but his back hit the wall and Metro Man slammed his hands at each side of his head and pinned him against the wall. Megamind hadn’t been cornered like this since they were in high school. 

Wayne remembered the moment well — Megamind teasing like he always did, trying to get attention from their classmates. Metro Dude had been so frustrated at his antics and had stormed out of gymnastics hall and into the boys locker-room. He had been agitated and didn’t know what to do, so he had hit a wall so it left a crater in it. 

Suddenly Megamind had come in after him, glowering like he had won a great battle.  _ “What, not going to be the white knight rescuing the random citizens of Metrocity?” _ he had taunted. 

Metro Dude had rose from the ground, flying over at lightning-speed and pinned Megamind against the locker. They had remained like that, each glaring at each other and their chests heaving. 

“ _ Whatever _ ,” Metro Dude had said eventually and pulled away. “ _ It’s pronounced Metro City. _ ” 

Metro Dude had gone back to gymnastics and Megamind had kept a close eye on him after that. Metro Dude had felt his attention almost burn a hole in the back of his head, and Metro Dude had felt victorious. 

Metro Man growled as he pinned the other against the copper-dome. Megamind was frozen in place, his eyes terrified and unfocused. Metro Man could hear his heartbeat as frantically as a drum vibrate between them. 

‘This is not okay,’ he thought to himself. He knew as he was doing it that it wasn’t. It’s not how they play the Game. It’s not even legal, to keep someone against their will and force them up against a wall. 

“T-time out?” whispered Megamind between frozen lips. It took Metro Man all his strength to pull away, to acknowledge that he actually heard the other. Metro Man took a steadying breath. The air was thick with Megamind’s scent. He could taste the fear, the pain, and underneath, there was something else. It was… not unpleasant. Metro Man was suddenly acutely aware that he had never been this close to Megamind for this long. It was having some kind of reaction on him. It had to be it. 

Metro Man glanced at Megamind, stiff and still with his back against the wall. 

“Sorry,” said Metro Man again, then he flew off. He didn’t look back, but he could hear the other as he disappeared. 

“What the fuck?” 


	2. Blood

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Megamind bleeds and Metro Man and Megamind have a discussion about cannibalism. It could not have gone worse.

Megamind made his own way home. His ankle was twisted, but he could walk, and once he reached the streets he hot-wired a car and drove home. His shoulder hurt like a son-of-a-bitch, but he wasn’t broken. All things considered it wasn’t the worst he had been after a scuffle with Metro Man. What was up with Metro Man, though, that was another thing entirely. 

Megamind had always known Metro Man didn’t have the greatest of impulse control. He craved positive attention, so he did everything in his power, and he had many, many powers, to be good. Trying to rescue Megamind from a perceived difficult battle with the other villains of Metrocity was just up Metro Man’s alley. But besides the times Metro Man had taken him to jail, Metro Man had never forcefully kept him somewhere. If it wasn’t time to go to jail Metro Man didn’t stop Megamind, not until the Game was done. 

No, Metro Man was acting unusual. He was more aggressive and he was growing larger. Megamind didn’t enjoy that thought. Metro Man was large enough as he was, thank you very much. 

Back in his lair, Megamind pushed his nemesis out of his thoughts and surveyed the mess the Doom Syndicate had made through monitors he had over the city. Some damage to buildings, a few reported injures at the hospital, nothing major. He contacted Minion, who reported that Miss Ritchi was safe and unharmed. 

“What a relief you got away, Sir.” said Minion through the radio. Megamind thought back on Metro Man, pinning him against the wall of the Observatory. He stroked his chin thoughtfully with his good arm. 

“Yes, Minion.” he said, but he was distracted. What was going on? He would have to think this through, and perhaps conduct some experiments. Whatever it was, he could sense that Metro Man wasn’t quite sure what he was doing either, and he wondered if he could use that to his advantage somehow? 

Okay, what did Megamind know? Besides the obvious battle-related things; Metro Man's nigh indestructibility, super-speed, laser-eyes and power of flight; he actually had quite a lot to go on. The blatantly obvious fact was that, even though he didn't look like it, Metro Man wasn't human. And just like Megamind, Metro Man was stranded on an alien planet without any kind of guidance from his people. Metro Man was in a sense even more alone than Megamind, who had Minion and actual memories of home. Before their glorious rivalry had truly blossomed Megamind had tried to talk to Metro Boy, and had learned the hard way that Wayne did not remember anything about before they arrived to Earth, nor did he wish to discuss it, least of all with Megamind.

Minion didn’t know much about their home worlds either, but at least he knew that all three of them were aliens on Earth. Wayne had spent most of his childhood and teenage years denying that very fact with a burning passion, and it was only really in later years, when Metro Man had been Metrocity’s hero for quite a while, that Megamind had heard even the sliver of acceptance towards their alien status from Wayne. 

Of course that acceptance had not been directed towards Megamind and Minion, but rather to a reporter that Metro Man had explained, very tight-lipped, that the golden pod he was donating to the soon-to-be Metro Man Museum, was the thing that had brought him to Earth. 

Another thing he knew was that they were from the same quadrant, and both inhabited planets had perished under the black hole. Both races were advanced enough to send out desperate rescue-arks, albeit on a minuscule scale, so it was probably safe to assume that the two races had had contact with each other before the hole devoured them. Megamind couldn’t help but shudder at the thought. The black hole featured in a lot of his nightmares, not that he would admit it to anyone. Not even Minion. 

One thing he knew with certainty, and that was that the growl Metro Man had released, first when he charged him in battle, and secondly when he pinned him against the wall, had terrified him. Not in a ‘ooh, how scary’ kind of thing — it had petrified him. Literally. He hadn’t been able to move. He hadn’t been able to think, which was even more terrifying. 

Megamind _thought_ . It was his whole fucking purpose! Metro Man wore tights and Megamind used his giant blue head. He certainly wasn’t about to let _Wayne Scott_ of all people take that away from him. 

So, what did that leave him with? Intergalactic neighbours, an autonomous fear-response to a warning growl from the species next door… Metro Man’s people had been predators to Megamind’s? 

While that thought certainly didn’t make him feel happy, it did make him feel kind of smug at least. It was definitely something he could dangle over Mr Goody-Two-Shoes if he ever needed a leverage. But how could a species, even if all of them were just as smart as Megamind, survive against such a threat as a whole ‘nother planet of Metro People? Especially long enough to develop a genetically triggered response to their sounds? 

It seemed… well, it certainly wasn’t without flaws, yet. Megamind would have to continue this line of thought, and decide what to do next. 

He still wanted to test Metro Man. As unpleasant as that growl had been, it was intriguing. Both Megamind’s response, but also Metro Man himself. He had seemed utterly confused by the whole situation, and, at least for the most part, Megamind didn’t believe Metro Man to be inherently dangerous to him. Perhaps that view would change if Megamind actually found any proof that he consisted of a species of natural prey to the Metro People, but if Metro Man wanted to kill him he would have done that years ago. 

Megamind suspected that Metro Man, perhaps even completely unbeknownst to himself, also felt that they were balancing forces. Metro Man needed Megamind just as much as Megamind needed Metro Man. How else would they play the Game? 

Megamind’s musings came to a halt, because at that moment Minion arrived to the Evil Lair and insisted on tending to Megamind’s injuries. Megamind decided not to tell his friend of what had happened between him and Metro Man. At least for the time being. He didn’t want to worry the fish unnecessarily. 

* * *

Megamind healed quickly. The next fight with Metro Man, everything was back to normal. Nothing unusual happened and Megamind acted his usual, animated self. Metro Man ignored the feeling that something was off — with him, with Megamind, with the whole situation. They had never been normal, had they, so it shouldn’t bother him. Right? 

But it did. Megamind was sharp with both his words and his fighting style. The newest invention involved giant swords and Metro Man could tell the little buddy got a kick out of it. He remembered how they had performed the three musketeers as a school play when they were kids. They had drawn notes for roles and Megamind had ended up playing d’Artagnan. He had actually been really good, not that Metro Boy had actually said as much. 

Megamind’s excitement was a bit contagious, and by the end Metro Man actually felt rather relieved. Last time had been a fluke, he decided. Yes, he had freaked out and the way he had acted had been out of line, but Megamind was over it, so Metro Man should get over it as well. 

Metro Man finally wrestled the swords out of Megamind’s hands and handed the villain over to the authorities. Normal. Roxanne waved him over, standing with her bored-looking camera man. 

“Metro Man, you have thwarted Megamind’s thrust against Metro City, could you samurais the experience?” She asked. Her blue eyes glinted mischievously and Metro Man politely ignored the mispronunciation. Megamind would be proud later when he watched the interview. 

“Well, Roxie, Megamind is a very dangerous individual, but what I can say now is that he is safe in custody and the helpless people of Metro City can rest easy again.”

“And the message Megamind broadcasted during the sword-fight;” asked Roxanne with her usual sharpness. “Do you think he made any _points regarding_ the mayors decision to carry through the renovation of the Old Spice district, effectively turning around four hundred of Metro City’s lowest-income families homeless?” 

Metro Man tried to keep his face neutral. That wasn’t his decision, so why would he have to comment on it? Metro Man kept bad guys in jail, not good but poor people in homes. That was selected officials jobs, not his. 

“Well,” he said as authoritatively as he could, hoping that it would deter Roxanne from commenting further. “While I do sympathize with the families that may be effected by this change, I consider Megamind’s call to action an attempt to cause civil unrest and uproar, rather than any having any noble goals with it. I would also like to remind everyone that demonstration of any kind is required under Metro City law to be approved before taking place and that going out armed as Megamind suggests is most likely serving an ulterior motive for the super-villain.” 

It Metro Man sounded like he read off a script it was because he basically was. The most useful advice his father had ever given him had been to, when in doubt, revert and cover legal necessity. Granted Lord Scott had talked about keeping their vast fortune and collection of companies intact by being sticklers for the rules, but Metro Man had applied it to other parts of his life. 

The only other advice from his father Wayne had never been able to erase from his brain had been given him when Lord Scott had obviously had too much to drink after a Christmas party with the firm. Lord Scott had pinned him under his gaze, a bit unfocused but more intensely than he usually looked at Wayne. 

“You ought to remember,” he said over the table, lighting a cigar. Wayne hated the smoke. “When you _own_ this city, make sure those who belongs to you fucking knows it.” Then he had slapped the ass of the waitress that walked past them and the firms executives had laughed along with him. 

Lord Scott later excused himself and Wayne spent the rest of the night pretending that he didn’t hear his father having sex with the waitress in the bathroom. 

It was — less of a useful advice, Metro Man had to admit, but in some way he applied it to Metro City. People that stepped out of line would have Metro Man to haul them off to jail. In a sense, he tried to make them see as politely as he could, just how they belonged in this system. 

Megamind had called him a hypocritical idiot for this point of view during a fight their banter had become a little more philosophical. Controlling people with the threat of pain if they misbehaved was tyrannical, said Megamind passionately. Then his face had split into a wicked grin. “ _So I guess it actually is perfect for you and the masters that tug your leash._ ” 

The evil plot had contained robotic dogs, so it had been a lot of dog-jokes that day. 

Roxanne hadn’t been with, either, so Megamind was both harder and crueller.

Speaking of Roxanne, Metro Man could tell she was dissatisfied with his answer. She turned to face the camera. 

“You heard it on KMCP channel 8 first, folks,” she said cheerfully. “The city’s hero, hard at work upholding the law.” 

The way she said it told Wayne what she thought about the law in this case, but he let it go and stood awkwardly where Roxanne had dismissed him. To his left a group of fans had gathered, pushing to see everything that he and the police was doing. Post-battle groupies was common occurrence, both for Metro Man and Megamind, if he was being honest. People loved to see what Megamind got up too, if he looked upset after a thwarted plan or not. Metro Man paid very little attention to it, to be honest. 

Suddenly though, an officer’s shout caused Metro Man to tense up. Immediately he looked to Megamind, suspecting him of breaking free. Instead of seeing his nemesis escape Metro Man saw a young blonde woman break through police-lines and toss herself around Megamind’s shoulders. She forced her lips against his, ramming him into the police vans backdoor. It took only a few seconds, but Metro Man could see it all slowed down. A fierce make-out session insured, ending with the woman biting Megamind’s lip before being pulled away by three officers. 

“I love you,” the woman screamed. Megamind looked stunned and ravished, a deep fuchsia spreading over his cheeks. Then Megamind looked over to Roxanne and Wayne, and Metro Man could smell the blood beading up from Megamind’s lip. 

Metro Man felt dizzy. Wayne had never experienced fainting, but he imagined this was the feeling right before that happened. The scent of Megamind’s blood had engulfed him completely. Metro Man had smelled it before. They fought a lot and Megamind liked getting hurt. 

At least that was what Metro Man had concluded every time the blue man stood up again after a beating. Of course he had smelled Megamind’s blood before. That was inevitable. It had never smelled like this though — sweet, intoxicating. 

When Metro Man was a teen he had experimented with alcohol; the strongest stuff only gave him a slight buzz, and Metro Dude had gone out of his way to try it all. But this scent, it made him feel like his teenage friends had looked when they overindulged. 

By his side Metro Man could hear Roxanne's teeth grind together harshly. That snapped Metro Man out of his funk, and he flew over to Megamind. The police got control over the woman and pulled her away from Megamind. 

“How about I escort him to prison,” said Metro Man, leaving no room for questions. He scooped Megamind up in his arms, hoisted them up in the air and shot off. 

With the other man in his arms, the scent came back strongly. Metro Man tried not to think of it until it grew too strong. Metro Man was on his way to Megamind’s prison, but suddenly he changed route and flew them to towards a rooftop, a secluded place away from prying eyes where they used to meet if they really needed to have a talk. It had only happened thrice in their life-time; lastly because Megamind had worried Minion was sick, but it had turned out to be bad digestion and nothing else. The time before that was after Metro Man and Roxanne broke up, and he wasn’t… well, he wasn’t handling it well. Megamind had set him back on track then, refocusing his attention on the Game. The first time, they had been teens. Metro Dude was starting late night patrols and he had been on his way home when he had caught Megamind’s scent. 

Even though Megamind hadn’t been a super-villain at that time, Metro Dude had worried the kid was up to no good, and had flown closer until he could see him. Megamind had just stood on the rooftop, staring out over the city’s skyline. Metro Dude hadn’t quite perfected his identification of scents and feelings at that time, but even then he could smell the sadness in the air. 

So Metro Dude had landed. 

“ _Come to push me off?”_ Megamind had said without turning around to face him. Megamind hadn’t said what he was sad over at the time, but they had talked almost kindly to each other for a while. 

_“See you in school,”_ Metro Dude said before he flew off. 

“ _Definitely,”_ said Megamind. The next day, Megamind set off a paint bomb during assembly and got suspended. As far as Metro Man remembered Megamind had never returned to school after that. When he had asked Kent about it later the teen had shrugged like he didn’t care. 

“ _Maybe he jumped off a building_ ,” he suggested cruelly and all their friends had laughed, so eventually Metro Dude had done that as well. He remembered thinking that _would_ have been funny — Megamind surrendering by his own free will.

Metro Man returned to the moment and set Megamind down. 

“You’ve _got_ to be kidding me,” hissed Megamind annoyed and glared at the rooftop as if offended. He turned around to face Metro Man, his arms crossed over his chest and his eyes narrowed. “Metro Mahn, two kidnappings in a row? If I didn’t know better I’d say my evil ways finally have corrupted your noble sen-si-billities.” 

“No, I just wanted to talk to you before I hauled you into jail.” said Metro Man. Then he added more quietly, “privately.” 

“Well I am your captive audience,” snarked Megamind and held up his handcuffed hands in mock-surrender. 

“So,” said Metro Man, suddenly… shy. Oh my gosh, he was actually stalling for something to say. “New lover?” 

Megamind raised an expressive black eyebrow at him and looked thoroughly unimpressed. “I have never seen that woman in my life.” 

Metro Man sighed and pinched the bridge of his nose like he was trying to quell down a head-ache. It did nothing, because Metro Man didn’t _have_ head-aches, but he thought it suited him. 

“Listen, we need to talk,” he said and looked at the other. “About last time, I am sorry.” 

Megamind regarded him silently. Metro Man suddenly felt less like a person and more like an interesting puzzle Megamind was mentally, and at rapid speed, solving. 

“Yes,” he said matter-of-factly and glared. “You have now said sorry _four_ times. Really, it’s getting repetitive.” 

Metro Man tried his best to keep an apology at bay. Megamind observed him, then he sighed. 

“Okay, what’s going on with you?” he snapped. “You haven’t been this unprofessional in years!” 

Megamind pushed a hand across his chest as if he was wounded. “It’s supposed to be _me_ who is irresponsible and unpredictable, not _Metro Mahn.”_ Metro Man said nothing to that. He shook his head. Megamind turned his to the side. With the collar he reminded Metro Man of a curious tropical bird. A black and blue tropical bird. 

“Are you feeling guilty because you’re struggling with the moral qualms of eating me?” asked Megamind suddenly. Metro Man startled. 

“What? No!” he gasped. Megamind made a disbelieving sound in the back of his throat. Metro Man stared. “Why would you even _ask_ me that?” 

Megamind shrugged. “Well, you are behaving unusual; you’re rougher and more prone to anger, you have kidnapped me twice, and you just _growled_ at me in what I can only assume is a threatening manner.” 

“So what, you think I’m gonna _eat_ you because of that?” asked Metro Man incredulously. Megamind flippantly shrugged again, but the tightness around his large eyes told Metro Man he was more alert than he let on. His heartbeat was beating rapidly and both of them knew the other was aware. 

“Sure.” said Megamind with as much casual energy he could muster. “You’ve obviously evolved for fighting; and you have the teeth of an omnivore.” 

“So have you!” Metro Man snapped back. 

“Alright then, I’ll eat _you_ if I get the chance,” said Megamind. Metro Man stared at him, feeling his mood darken. 

“You think I would _eat_ you?” he asked again. This time Megamind seemed to pick up on his change of mood. He straightened and turned his eyes to steadily meet Metro Man’s.

“Probably.” he said. 

Metro Man did something he hadn’t done since he was a child. He launched himself towards the other, without using any of his powers — just a messy, sloppy attack. Megamind rolled away and started running as fast as he could. To Metro Man’s horror Megamind leaped off the building with no regard for his own safety. Using his super-speed Metro Man caught up with Megamind, flew him back onto the roof and tossed him to the ground. 

Time returned to normal and Megamind grunted painfully. Metro Man had been more careful in catching him this time but being picked up in super-speed tended to hurt a lot, no matter how carefully Metro Man was. 

“What the hell?” screamed Metro Man, staring at the man lying gasping on the ground. “You could have killed yourself!” 

“Rather that than being eaten,” coughed Megamind weakly. Metro Man should be concerned, but he felt his anger flush up again. 

“I’m not going to eat you!” 

“You fucking launched at me, how am I supposed to know that?” Megamind sat up slowly, collapsed into a coughing fit and then spit out blood on the roof. 

The scent of him, that had kind of calmed down after Megamind stopped bleeding from his lip, returned ten-fold. Metro Man tensed up and took a deep sniff of it. God, it tasted good. 

His eyes shot open and he stared at Megamind, then took a step back in shock. 

“Shit,” he said and put a hand over his mouth. “I _do_ want to eat you.” 

Megamind watched him with hard, guarded eyes. “Go on,” he said. 

“Your blood, I can smell it.” said Metro Man and shook his head fiercely. “It smells _good._ ” 

Metro Man turned around and vomited. It didn’t stop until he had nothing left and only dry-heaves rocked his body. Metro Man had never cried in his entire life, but there and then he did. “God, no.” 

“You’re overreacting,” said Megamind over Metro Man’s sobs. He sounded strange, a mixture of pain, fear and… compassion tingling his voice. “Really, I’m almost flattered.” 

“It’s not funny, Buddy!” snapped Metro Man. “I’m a fucking cannibal.”

“Technically you’re only a cannibal if you eat your own species.” Megamind pointed out. “We’re not the same species.” 

“Semantics doesn’t matter right now.” said Metro Man, but he felt himself calming down as Megamind talked to him. He sat down next to his sick and turned to face the other man. 

“Yes it does.” said Megamind and bored his green eyes into him. It made Metro Man’s stomach twist. “For instance, have you ever wanted to eat anyone other than me?” 

Metro Man started heaving again, but nothing came. “I don’t _want_ to eat _you_ ,” he gasped out. Really; the thought, the very notion repulsed him to his very core. 

“Make up your mind, Metro Mahn,” Megamind snapped, the only thing giving away he was as freaked out as much as Metro Man was. “Either you want to eat me, or you don’t.”

“I don’t _want_ to eat you,” Metro Man repeated. “But why else would your blood smell… _good_?” Megamind considered it for a while. Metro Man could see the gears turn at rapid pace in his large head.

“Well,” said Megamind almost hesitatingly. “What do you mean by that it smells good?” 

Metro Man’s cheeks flushed a dark red. He took a shaky breath and frowned. 

“I don’t know, _good!_ ” Megamind rolled his eyes. 

“Well, fucking work with me here Wayne,” Megamind snapped and clutched his aching ribs. “Good as mouthwatering? Good as your stomach growling?” 

“ _No_!” 

“Than what?!” Megamind snapped back. 

“Like hot!” Metro Man screamed. Megamind stilled and raised an eyebrow. 

“Hot?” He said confused. Metro Man gritted his teeth. 

“Sexy.” he clarified between his teeth. 

“Arousing?” asked Megamind. “You find my blood... arousing?” 

With that Metro Man was certain that was the case. The thought of eating Megamind was revolting, but with the scent… he wanted to lick at him. He wanted to pin him down and explore everything there was to explore. Feel skin on skin as Megamind tensed up and grew stiff the way he had the time Metro Man had flown them to the Observatory. 

“Take me home,” said Megamind coldly. Metro Man stood up and helped the other up. Megamind refused to meet his eyes, and Metro Man was thankful. The superhero picked the super-villain up in silence and flew Megamind to his evil lair. Jail was out of the question. 

After they landed Metro Man bent the handcuffs off of Megamind’s wrists. They stood in silence for a moment facing each other without looking each other in the eye. Metro Man was focusing on where Megamind’s forehead turned to actual head, Megamind was staring directly in front of him into Metro Man’s chest. 

Megamind took a deep breath, getting ready to say something, then he snapped his mouth shut, turned around on his heel and fled into the Lair. Metro Man heard him disappear into a bubble of soundproofing, but he could still see him through the lead door. 

Megamind bolted every lock the door had, then he shoved a really heavy piece of furniture against the door. 

It wouldn’t stop Metro Man if he wanted to get in, they both knew that, but Megamind did it anyway. 

Metro Man stood frozen where Megamind had left him. He should leave, he shouldn’t be looking, but he couldn’t actually look away. He needed to know what the other would do. Metro Man watched as Megamind collapsed to the floor and let out a long whine. His heart was beating as fast as if Megamind was having a heart attack, but Metro Man could see it was a panic attack. Megamind was freaking out and held his hands over his face. Metro Man could see him hyperventilating. 

A low rumble escaped Metro Man’s throat. 

Megamind froze up, panic making his heart beat even faster. The scent was overwhelming. Metro Man growled, louder this time, and then, to keep himself from busting into the Lair he shot into the air and as far away he could get from Megamind.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Something about the thought of Megamind curiously asking Metro Man if he's thought about eating him is really funny to me. Please comment something!


	3. "Growl at this, asshole"

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Megamind does a little midnight burgulary at the Metro Man Museum.

Eventually Megamind calmed down long enough to exhaustedly crawl himself to bed. Sleep did not come, but instead he laid in bed, shaking as if he had a fever. He shouldn’t have asked Metro Man if he had some bloodthirsty urge to eat him, he should have bided his time, but somehow the question had just slipped out, and Megamind didn’t like what he had heard. 

“What the -” he heard Minion exclaim when he came back to the lair, then came sounds of what could only be Minion pushing the filing-cabinet Megamind had bolted the door with to the side. “Sir?” 

“Yes.” said Megamind tonelessly. Minion arrived at the bed and looked him over. 

“I thought you were in jail?” Minion sputtered, confusion all over his face. “Metro Man flew you off!” 

Megamind could feel his cheeks and ears colour a deep fuchsia. 

“He was no match for my amazing intellect,” said Megamind unconvincingly. Minion hesitated, then stood up.

“Shall I get us some snacks than, Sir?” he said. 

“Good idea, Minion.” said Megamind in as much of a dismissal as there ever was one. Minion retreated to the kitchen and Megamind closed his eyes. 

‘Focus,’ he thought to himself. Pay attention, listen, categorize, analyse, interpret. 

Metro Man is aroused by the smell of his blood. Megamind winced. That’s messed up. 

Megamind was a super-villain and even  _ he _ wasn’t attracted to blood! 

‘Refocus,’ said his mind calmly. Megamind took a deep breath. He replayed the battle, the capture and everything that came after it. Metro Man’s growling before he disappeared stood out to him the most after thorough analyzation. Megamind definitely had an involuntary and biological response to the sound. 

He thought of infrasound, low-frequency sounds that could cause physical responses in humans even though they weren’t technically able to hear the sound. One such thing was the classical and controversial fear frequency, which some people suggested where the ghost-frequency. 

Megamind had his own share of ghosts, but they didn’t have a specific frequency. Instead, Megamind mused, an uncomfortable feeling and even fear was more likely to affect humans because of the vibrations that sound actually was, rather than ghosts. Vibrations had an effect on people, that’s why it could be dangerous to live too close to an active construction site for too long, or why people could get sick when not using the proper equipment to protect themselves. Megamind was not  _ people _ , though. He wasn’t human. And neither was Metro Man. 

There was something with Metro Man’s sound and Megamind’s physiological response to it, something important. If only he could reach out and grab at it, but it disappeared when he tried to focus on it. Slipped from his fingers like sucked in by a black hole. 

That’s it! Megamind sat up with a start. Whatever answers he needed to this question; there weren’t any on Earth. But there must have been answers somewhere else, before the black hole devoured the planets that held them. And Metro Man had donated the very device that brought him to Earth to the Metro Man Museum like an imbecile. 

Possibly the pod didn’t mean anything to Metro Man and his collection of dumb-witted goons, but Megamind had never had the chance to study it. Perhaps there were some answers hidden within the code, something to guide the last survivor of an entire race to understand himself? 

Megamind wasn’t an idiot. His escape pod had been a botched up job, created in panic and desperation. His parents had used their last tooth and nail to save him from going under, but Metro Man… his pod was well-designed, drove smoothly, had a destination and a purpose. 

The Metro People had sent Metro Man from their planet on purpose, rather than just in a desperate attempt to save something. It made sense that they had sent something of their culture with them, right? 

At least, Megamind would have — only, Metro Man wasn’t smart or curious enough to find it. He hadn’t even wanted to believe he was an alien, why would he have wanted to know more of that dead, alien culture? 

It was almost stupid Megamind hadn’t thought of it himself until now. Sure, it wasn’t  _ his  _ people, but they had been his neighbours. Maybe there was something about them, about him in Metro Man’s pod as well? 

Megamind got up, changed clothes into something more casual than the battle-outfit. Still stylish, still bad, just perfect for some midnight burglary. Megamind and some brain-bots slipped into the night before Minion could stop them and made their way towards the half-finished Metro Man Museum. 

* * *

The security was a joke. Anyone could waltz in, and based on the fact that the city had collected a bunch of Megamind’s own inventions in the museum, he was offended. Didn’t they realize they had weapons of mass-destruction on their hands and not just some flashy exhibition of dinosaur-bones? 

Megamind made his way through the white marble halls. The whole building was surrounding a giant statue of Metro Man, holding a golden globe. Megamind thought it a little ridiculous comparing the superhero to the Greek titan of Atlas. The titan had been a scholar, after all, not a war-machine. 

He was just walking past a large display about Metro Man — filled out with a few of the hero’s superpowers and a larger than life scale of Metro Man’s organs when a dull voice rang out. 

“Hey, we’re closed.” Megamind stopped and saw a human with mousy brown, bushy hair and glasses walk towards him, pushing a cart of books. The human stopped by him and frowned. “Well, that’s a pretty tasteless costume.” 

Megamind glanced down at himself. 

“Megamind’s head is not that grossly exaggerated.” Megamind pulled out his De-gun and twitched to the right setting. “Oh, and you’ve even made a cheap replica of his de-hydration gun, how u-”

The De-gun flashed blue and then the human became a tiny, glowing cube on the floor.

“Idiot,” Megamind snorted and looked back to the display of Metro Man. He snapped a finger to one of the brain-bots to take a picture of it, then they carried on towards Metro Man’s escape pod. 

The museum had placed the little space-ship on a pedestal and there were stairs around it so people could step up and see down where little Metro Baby had been lying as he flew through space, but Megamind wasn’t interested in that part. That was just a cot, but if there was something of interest in the pod, it would be underneath that. The pod had to have a computer of some kind, a mainframe that controlled it. 

Megamind made quick work, feeling around all edges and crooks of the pod, then swiftly pulled a hidden compartment out from beneath the golden edge. He looked at it for a moment, scanning the computer and how it was connected with intricate little golden wires into the rest of the pod.

The pod was a battery, Megamind guessed. He would need the whole thing. The brain-bots picked the pod up and hauled it off with a few excited bowgs. They sure loved midnight burglary. 

Megamind looked around and his eyes landed on the security-camera by the ceiling. He angled his head up, allowed it to get a good look at him. Fucking Metro Man, he thought, then grinned viciously at the camera. He’d give him something to growl about. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A little shorter chapter, but I hope you enjoyed!


	4. misplaced usermanual?

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Metro Man tries to figure out Megamind's next move. Wayne tries to figure out himself.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Trigger-warning; discussions of rape/rape-fantasies and also kind of crude language?

Metro Man was with the chief of police, Thor Murdoc, at the Metro Man Museum. It was months from completion, but apparently that hadn’t stopped Megamind from crashing the party early. Together with a security guard they were reviewing the footage from the night before. 

Metro Man was looking at a screen, getting a good view of the blue man arriving with a bunch of brain-bots. They made their way inside and the camera shifted to another angle. Megamind stopped in front of an exhibit, then the curator of the museum caught him in the act. 

“And the man have been revived?” asked Metro Man seriously. The security guard, Irving Wells, nodded. 

“Yes sir, the moment the police found the cube.” 

“He didn’t have anything useful to add,” said Murdoc. “Apparently didn’t realize it  _ was  _ Megamind before he shot him. Thought it was a costume.” 

“He must be out of town,” said Metro Man dryly. He squinted, trying to see what Megamind was looking at, but the pixels on the screen even his super-vision couldn’t interpret. “What’s he doing?”

Wells squinted as well. 

“Looking at an exhibit, sir.” Metro Man ignored the annoyance that was welling up in his throat. 

“Which exhibit?” he asked instead. 

“Uh, science, I think.” said Wells. 

“It’s a chart of your physiology,” said a drawling voice from the door. Metro Man turned to see the man he had watched Megamind turn into a cube the night before come in with a police escort. 

“You’re the curator?” Metro Man asked. The man’s face didn’t change. 

“Bernard,” he said, sounding bored. He nodded back to the screen. “It’s just a bunch of facts and an x-ray picture of your body.” 

Metro Man frowned. Why would Megamind break into the museum to watch a few exhibitions? Especially after what had transpired between them last night? Wayne tried not to think about it, instead turning his attention back to the case. “Show me what he did next.” 

Wells switched to the next camera, catching Megamind going up and inspecting Metro Man’s arrival-pod. He couldn’t see from the perspective, but it looked like Megamind stroked his fingers around its edge. Suddenly, a hatch popped open at the genius clever administrations. Metro Man’s jaw dropped. 

He didn’t know it could do that! To be honest, Metro Man had always found the pod to be rather boring. It didn’t do anything, and whatever metal it was made out of he couldn’t see through. He had shaken it once, but it had made no sound what so ever. 

Megamind inspected what he had found for a bit, then seemed to make up his mind. He stood up and gestured for the brain-bots. They picked up the pod with their robotic arms and carried it away out of frame. 

Megamind turned his face towards the camera and stared at it for a long moment. Metro Man could see a harsh grin spread across his face. Metro Man knew that look. It meant that the Game was starting. 

Then, Megamind lifted a hand and blew a kiss towards the camera before he swirled around and disappeared. 

Metro Man stood frozen in place. “Rewind a little.” 

Wells did and they watched the same thing over again. Megamind looked to the camera, Megamind grinned, Megamind blew a kiss. 

Wayne felt his ears burning with embarrassment, but no one else seemed to notice. 

“What would Megamind want with your ship?” asked chief Murdoc confused. Metro Man said nothing. 

“Well, it’s obviously a computer of some kind,” said the curator,  _ Bernard _ , with a long-suffering sigh. “Maybe he wants to convert it into a weapon.” 

“Would that be possible?” Murdoc glanced at Metro Man. “He can do that?” 

“Possibly,” said Metro Man. Probably. Megamind was extremely resourceful with what he could do with common material found on Earth. What wouldn’t he be able to do with something completely  _ alien _ ? 

Wayne never thought about it, but he assumed that both his race and Megamind’s had been pretty advanced, far ahead of Earth’s technology, to be able to send both of them away from the black hole. 

Why now? When Metro Man had left the Evil Lair Megamind had been a mess — both in pain and freaking out. Then a couple of hours later he goes out and steals Metro Man’s pod from the Metro Man Museum? There had to be a connection, but unfortunately, Megamind’s mind tended to make connections so fast and wide that Metro Man usually had to have the villain explain it to him to even understand the leaps. It usually seemed like complete nonsense until Megamind somehow made it all make sense again. 

“Can I have a copy of the tape?” Metro Man asked. Wells nodded and made one for him, recording it all on a VHS-tape and handed it to him. Metro Man nodded thanks and turned to the chief of police. “Chief, keep an alert for Megamind, but do not approach if he is sighted. Consider him armed and dangerous.” 

“Will do, Metro Man.” Murdoc nodded sagely and scratched his furry moustache. “But tell me, how did Megamind escape from you last night?” 

“He…” Metro Man hesitated and glanced back at the screen. It showed nothing of interest, only an empty pedestal where his pod and Megamind had been before. “It doesn’t matter. He won’t get away a second time.” 

Before they could ask more questions Metro Man flew off. He took to floating over the city, mulling it over in his head. He could barge into Megamind’s lair and demand he return Metro Man’s pod to him. It was his after all, and he didn’t like it when people stole his stuff. On the other hand, Metro Man’s rather confrontational behaviour the last couple of times had let to Megamind thinking he wanted to  _ eat  _ him, and after that Metro Man had said some pretty embarrassing things. 

He couldn’t figure it out, he didn’t find Megamind attractive. Did he? Of course he didn’t. He wasn’t gay. He had never had any inclination towards dudes, and he had slept around. A lot. With women. 

Women didn’t smell like the scent last night, though. It confused him. He wasn’t a violent guy. Yes, he had a violent job, but that was all part of being a hero. So, since he wasn’t a violent guy, he wasn’t attracted to violent things. He had  _ never _ found that hot. 

In collage his roommate and best friend James had been really into rape-fantasies, which he played out with his girlfriend  _ a lot _ . Wayne had often come back to their dorm, realized James were fucking Linda on the floor while she pretend-cried and asked to be punished, and had left again. 

Wayne knew it was pretend because he had checked in on Linda, and let's just say, he knew she enjoyed it. James had even once asked Wayne to a three-way — a very elaborate and thought-out plan which involved James first “attacking” and “raping” Linda, then Metro Dude would show up to “save” her, and demand “a bit of compensation for the trouble”. Wayne, bless his soul, had for some fucking reason agreed. He was young, stupid and had been going through a bit of a rough patch with an ex-girlfriend of his, and after talking and assuring himself that Linda also wanted it, they had given it a try. 

Wayne had hated it. The further they got into it, the more repulsed Wayne felt. He had just “rescued” Linda from James, and she had suggested doing something for him and… Wayne left. He had flown around aimlessly much like he was doing now, until he had run into Megamind who just had started his super-villain career, and they had fought. 

He had told James the next day that he had heard Megamind causing trouble and that’s why he had ditched. 

“ _ That’s okay, man” _ James had said with a shrug. “ _ We went to round two without you _ .” 

So. Wayne, not violent. Not turned on by that, at all. Yet he knew what he had said to Megamind to be true. The scent of Megamind’s blood had been one of the sexiest things he had ever smelled. 

Scents were a big thing for him in general, considering he had a pretty excellent sense of smell. He could smell and pinpoint his parents from their smell, Roxanne from the whiff of her perfume mixed with the specific scent that was wholly her, Minion from the mix of plastic fur and salt-water, Megamind… well. Scents were a big part of his everyday life, but lots of people liked scents. That was normal. 

Wanting to lick on your nemesis because he bit his tongue when you grabbed him and slammed him into the ground was not normal. Metro Man needed to figure this out before it got out of hand. If he knew Megamind they were already playing the Game again, and if his head wasn’t in the Game it could be dangerous. 

Perhaps Roxanne could have some insights. He hesitated, thinking how mad she has seemed at him after their interview yesterday. Then he decided to screw it. He has already made some bad decisions, he may as well try to fix one of them. 

Metro Man flew straight to Roxanne’s office and entered through a window a window-washer had opened to do their work. Metro Man waltzed into KMCP’s main area and went over to Roxanne's desk. 

She was hard at work, writing a piece while her camera man was chatting away at her. 

“So we’ve been planning a full-day assault all week,” said the camera man enthusiastically. “I’m the leader, obviously, so it was mainly my plan, and Bruce said -” the camera man stopped and stared at Metro Man as he approached. Metro Man took a look at him and decided the man had been talking about a video game or something. Everyone in the office had noticed him, except Roxanne who were still writing. Metro Man cleared his throat. 

She looked up, eyes widening. “Metro Man.” 

“Hey. Can I talk with you for a second?” he asked. Roxanne glanced around the silent office, seeing all the staring people. Even a person without super-ears could have heard a pin drop. 

“Of course,” said Roxanne and stood up. She was wearing blue today, with a pair of comfortable looking shoes. Roxanne led him into a corner office and closed both the door and the blinds. Metro Man was thankful. “What’s up?” 

“It’s Megamind.” said Metro Man and rubbed his neck, then he gave the VHS-tape to Roxanne. She eyed it cautiously, then accepted it and walked over to the desk. Roxanne sat down and reviewed the footage. 

“When was this?” said Roxanne with a confused frown. 

“Last night,” said Metro Man. 

“Last night?” Roxanne raised her face to look at him. “I thought he was in jail?” 

“He escaped.” 

Roxanne raised an eyebrow. “How did that happen?” 

Metro Man shifted uncomfortably and avoided eye contact. “He outmanoeuvred me, that’s all.” 

“And then he went to the Metro Man Museum and stole some old junk?” asked Roxanne. Metro Man huffed his chest out. 

“Hey, it’s not junk, it’s my… my spaceship.” he said defensively. Roxanne rolled her eyes. 

“I know that, I just mean; it’s old. As old as you are. And he’s never showed an interest in it before, right?” 

Metro Man nodded agreement. Roxanne rewound the tape and watched it again, down to a quarter-speed this time. 

“Well, he clearly figured out how to open it,” said Roxanne after a thoughtful pause. “Did you know it could do that?” 

“No,” said Metro Man honestly. He didn’t know much about the pod or their home worlds at all. Megamind had always said they were from the same quadrant and while Wayne had never doubted the other, per se, he hadn’t necessarily asked questions either. To be honest, Megamind’s acute recollection of the events bothered him a bit. They had been babies when they arrived to Earth, so how did Megamind remember all of this? 

Metro Man was pretty certain that if his mom hadn’t confessed to it all on his tenth Christmas and showed him the pod he had arrived in, Metro Man had probably happily gone on thinking he was just a mutant or something. The fact that Megamind’s constant nagging was what finally had gotten Wayne to cave and ask was entirely incidental.

Mutants were at least heard of, but  _ aliens _ ? Well, as far as Wayne knew, there existed only three; Megamind, Minion and Metro Man. 

“So, what’s the theory here?” Roxanne asked, already writing down something on a list. 

“Well, the curator suggested that he maybe was building some kind of weapon.” said Metro Man thoughtfully. Roxanne scoffed. 

“Yeah, no kidding.” she drawled and showed the first thing she’d written; ‘WEAPON?’, in big, bold letters. “Come on, what else?

“He can build weapons out of anything,” Roxanne mused out loud and tapped the pen against her lips. “Why would he need  _ your  _ pod, specifically? It had to be pretty important if he escaped from you and immediately went to get it.” 

“Maybe,” said Metro Man. He started floating around the room, his version of pacing to keep him distracted. 

“Wayne,” said Roxanne thoughtfully. “You don’t think the pod have some kind of information in it?” 

Metro Man stopped and looked at her. Roxanne gave him a suggestive look. “You know, like how to destroy you.” 

“I don’t think so,” said Metro Man, but Roxanne had a point. Metro Man hadn’t even known the pod could open like that. Maybe it did come with a user manual. A user manual now in Megamind’s hands. 

“Well, I’ll do some digging.” Roxanne promised. He could already see her gears turning, longing to get on the chase. Roxanne had once said that she would have made a good detective, except that she cared for the truth too much. Journalism suited her fine. 

“There’s something else,” Metro Man said hesitantly. Roxanne looked up at him. Metro Man rubbed his neck again. “Megamind and I were… well, we kind of had an argument.” 

Roxanne’s big, blue eyes blinked, then her eyebrow shot up in the air. “Yes, that’s kind of how it goes.”

“Not then,” Metro Man snapped. Oh, why had he opened his mouth? “Afterwards. When we were talking.” 

“You two talk?” asked Roxanne interested. Metro Man crossed his arms defensively over his chest. 

“Sometimes.” he said. 

“So what?” Roxanne laughed. “Are you worried Megamind got offended like a scorned lover and stole your stuff just to be petty?” 

She sobered up when Metro Man didn’t laugh with her. “Wayne?” 

“Forget it.” he said. “See what you can dig up, I’ll patrol the harbour in case Megamind shows up, apparently finally in possession of the knowledge on how to destroy me.” 

“We don’t know the pod contains that kind of information -” said Roxanne but by then Metro Man had used his super-speed and was long gone. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Apologies for all the oc's, I wanted to fill out the world a little. My faviourite is James; just a total douche, but in the way that all Metro Man's friends are. You know they're all douches (besides Roxanne). Please leave a comment!


	5. Halloween

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Megamind tries to figure out more about his home world and Metro Man agrees to go to a party.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter contains masturbation (not explicit).

Megamind was hitting a snag. Metro Man’s pod had a lot of information than he had dared to hope, but unfortunately it was all encrypted. He had been at it for days, running every simulation he could think of and he had yet to crack it. It frustrated him beyond belief. 

The fact that Metro Man had had all of this beneath his fingertips for years without using it — well, there was a reason Megamind was the brains and Metro Man the brawns, weren’t there? 

As usual, Metro Man had more handed to him than he could do with while Megamind was left fighting for scraps. 

“Why do we have Metro Man’s escape pod, Sir?” asked Minion from the sofa. The henchman, plopped down in the evil swirl-chair was busy sewing on a new outfit for a battle Megamind had yet managed to develop in full, and he could feel Minion’s reddish eyes bore into the back of his head as he worked on a screen. 

“I told you, Minion,” said Megamind, his teeth gritting together in frustration. “To extract knowledge of Metro Mahn and use it to finally destroy him.” 

“Of course, Sir,” said Minion agreeably. “I just mean, why have we taken it now?” 

Because Metro Man is behaving unpredictably, Megamind thought. Because Metro Man is losing his composure, doing more and more things against the Game. Because Megamind needs to  _ know _ Metro Man, otherwise it is a very dangerous game they are playing and it’s going to end up with Megamind dead. 

Because Megamind is curious, now, and he’s hoping there will be something in the damned forsaken thing that will make the aching, black hole in his chest feel a little more full and not pulling him apart. 

“Opportunity, Minion,” said Megamind instead and cackled evilly as an afterthought. “And imagine the outrage when the pristine Metro Man Museum opens to the public and Metro Man can’t even keep his own things inside it.” 

“How can you even be sure it is something inside it?” Minion asked. “Could be just a navigation-system.” 

Megamind shook his head. 

“It has to be more,” he said determinedly. A flight-system wouldn’t have this much data encoded within it. This was an ark — a lone survivor being shipped off with the last semblance of what had once been a great culture. Megamind knew it, and he was certain that once he got past the encryptions there would be something about — something about their solar system. There had to be! 

“How do you feel about churros, Sir?” said Minion, abruptly changing the subject. “We could go to the park, maybe meet up with Mitch and tend to the business. You know, the  _ business _ we haven’t tended to in days?” 

Megamind did know. Metrocity’s criminal empire did not run itself, no matter how efficient Megamind had made it. Battles with Metro Man was one thing, but the business was another entirely. It consisted of making sure everyone was doing what they were supposed to be doing and no one was getting out of line. The Doom Syndicate had already been poking about where they didn’t belong and last time Mitch had been in touch he had said something about a shipment going to the wrong place. 

If Megamind had to deal with another of Psycho Delic’s spliced goods being distributed into Downtown Metro Area and making everyone hallucinate they were part of a massive orgy, which ended up with a lot of tree-humping in the park again he would actually lose it. 

“Yes, Mitch; good idea.” said Megamind. “How about you pop over to the park and I finish this up.” 

“Sir.” Minion was using his serious voice now. “It’s not cracking. It’s been a week.” Megamind frowned and turned to look at him. “What day is it?” 

“Friday.” Minion gave him an all-knowing look that told him he was very aware Megamind had lost track of time. Megamind thought it was Tuesday. 

“Oh.” he said. 

Minion looked thoughtful and put down the outfit he was working on. 

“How about I go to the park and see Mitch and you take a break?” Minion’s face brightened up and he continued nonchalantly. “Maybe you’ll figure Metro Man’s secrets out after a little nap?” 

Megamind considered it. He hadn’t taken a break in a while. Maybe it would actually be good for him. 

“Oh, alright.” he grumbled and stood up. “Bring back churros.” 

“Of course Sir.” said Minion cheerfully and bounced up. 

Megamind left the computer running tests on the pod, waved Minion off from the Lair and then went to the bathroom. Megamind actually looked a bit worn in the mirror. Lack of sleep and a laser focus had made him zoom in on Metro Man’s pod. And then there was the rather disturbing comment of how his blood smelled arousing. 

Megamind scrunched up his face and went to bed. What was up with that anyway? Metro Man spends their entire lives putting Megamind in the bad corner, then one day he flips the script and is aroused? That’s just plain rude, that’s what it is. 

Megamind is a professional, he shouldn’t have to put up with this. Fucking Wayne. 

Fucking Wayne wanting to fuck Megamind? Ugh, that didn’t sound right. Megamind tried to find a comfortable position, staring into the ceiling. 

Maybe he should have gone with Minion. He sighed loudly. He did feel tired, but restless at the same time. 

“Arousing,” he said softly to himself, letting the R roll longer than it should. Megamind closed his eyes, counted to a million, tried to relax. Technically hot and sexy, Metro Man had said. Megamind was incredibly handsome, so he supposed it was just a matter of time really. One of the burdens of being him. 

He itched his stomach. Without a really conscious choice Megamind’s hand went further down until it reached his groin. It did feel like sparks shot through him at that, so he did it for a while. He was rarely alone, so it’s not like he ever got alone time. Minion wouldn’t be back for a while. 

“What the hell,” Megamind decided and shoved his hand underneath his pyjama-pants. 

Megamind made quick work, letting his mind wander for a bit. Thoughts jumped between old plans and for some reason last year's Halloween ploy stood out. They had kidnapped Miss Ritchi from channel 8’s firm-party. He had been dressed out as Doctor Frankenstein, Minion was a mummy. Miss Ritchi was dressed out as Megamind. 

He’d felt oddly flattered. 

Megamind flipped around to his stomach and grounded into the bedsheets, thought of the witty back and forth banter; Miss Ritchi’s loud laughter when Metro Man had showed up dressed as Frankenstein’s monster, and how Metro Man at the end of their battle, when Megamind was being pushed into the backseat of a cop car had come over and handed Megamind a chocolate bar. 

“ _ It’s supposed to be trick  _ or _ treat,”  _ Megamind had said. 

“ _ In that case you’d never get treats”  _ had Metro Man replied with a grin. 

Megamind came, then he grunted. 

‘What was that about?’ he thought, feeling somewhat dirty now, like he’d done something wrong. He needed some air.

* * *

Metro Man had waited to see Megamind play out his hand, but nothing had happened since the theft. Megamind had not even been seen at all, which worried Metro Man a little. Halloween was just around the corner and Megamind loved Halloween. Usually there were an escalating build-up as they drew closer to the 31 of October, but this year, nothing.

Even Metro City’s citizens were a bit disappointed. Megamind used to televise the different plots and it had actually become a bit of a tradition for many people. 

James was one of the most disappointed, which he made sure Wayne knew when he came over to the Scott Mansion that day. 

“It doesn’t even feel like autumn,” said James grumpily and eyed Wayne with some suspicion. “You haven’t killed him, have you?” 

Wayne grit his teeth, keeping a growl down by reciting itsy-bitsy spider to himself until he calmed down. “No, I have not killed Megamind.” 

“Then what?” snapped James. He had just coloured his hair blond, which was not a good look on him. “We’re supposed to have a party tonight, how’re we supposed to get into the Halloween-spirit?” 

“I’m sure you’ll figure it out,” said Wayne and sipped his coffee.

“You two haven’t broken up, have you?” Wayne chocked, then looked at James with wide eyes. “What?” 

“Yeah, your rivalry-thing.” James gave him a sharp look. Wayne wiped his face with a napkin and avoided eye contact. 

“Oh.” he said. James started laughing. 

“Or what, you have something more I don’t know about?” He chuckled and shook his head. “Mega-Loser wishes.” 

Wayne glared at him, but James didn’t notice. He was too busy congratulating himself over his joke. 

“Hey, you’re fucking coming tonight, right?” said James suddenly. Wayne groaned. For weeks James had been trying to convince him to come to James’s newest girlfriend, Clara’s, Halloween party. Wayne wasn’t really feeling it. Maybe he could have asked Roxanne, but she had thrown herself into investigating what Megamind’s latest plot could be, and he didn’t think she’d stop anytime soon.

“I don’t know, man, I don’t have time.” he said. “Patrol.” 

“Patrol for fucking what?” James said. “It’s not like Megamind’s fucking doing anything, anyway.” 

“Can’t let down the guard.” said Wayne. It was like a mantra. Every day, can’t let down the guard, had to protect Metro City. 

“It’s not like you’re even getting drunk,” said James. “Come on, Clara’s got this friend, Vanessa. She’s wicked hot.” 

The older they got, the more interested James got in setting Wayne up with someone. He was pretty sure it was actually Clara that pushed for it, but James had jumped onboard rather quickly. “I don’t know.” 

“When’s the last time you got laid, dude?” James frowned at him. “You’re  _ Metro Man _ , you should be living the OG-life, instead you’re watering your moms plants for the weekend.” 

“Mother have a household staff, I’m pretty sure they’re watering her plants,” said Wayne doubtfully. 

“You’re coming,” James decided, ignoring him. “You can even wear your suit, chicks love the suit.” 

Wayne thought about it. Megamind had been quiet this Halloween. And James did have a point; it’s not like Metro Man got drunk. If Megamind decided to cause a scene sometime during the party, Metro Man would be able to deal with it. 

“Fine,” said Wayne. Maybe a distraction was just what he needed. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Please leave a comment!


	6. Kiss

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Wayne goes to the party, only to run into Megamind.

The party was loud. For Metro Man it was even louder, because besides the music he could hear every single person screaming over it to their friends. Outside where was a queue of people wanting to get in, and the bar was filled with people shovelling each other to get to the alcohol. 

“Wayne,” shouted James over the music, but Wayne would have heard him just fine if he had talked normally. “Can’t you get drinks?” 

James eyed the crowd at the bar meaningfully and Metro Man floated over. People that had been struggling to get to the drinks separated around him like Moses parting the Red Sea. 

“Three beers please,” said Wayne in his most charming Metro Man voice. “And a large glass of vodka.” 

The bartender started at him, then glanced down at the logo on his chest. Wayne got the drinks on a tray and floated back to his friends. 

James and Clara had a couple-costume of course, where Clara was Alice and James the Mad Hatter. Megamind had a Wonderland-themed Halloween heist two years ago. It had involved food that actually shrunk everyone that had bought food at Metro Zombie Festival at least a metre shorter. It had only lasted about two hours and forty-five minutes, but it had caused quite a big mess before everyone naturally reverted to their original size. 

“Thanks, man,” said James and took a beer.

“There’s Vanessa,” said Clara and waved over a taller woman in a blue costume. Wayne and Vanessa shook hands awkwardly, and the whole thing became even more awkward when James and Clara started making out in front of them. Wayne handed Vanessa a beer and looked anywhere else than the corner James and Clara were smooching in. 

“So, what are you?” Wayne asked, gesturing to Vanessa’s costume. Vanessa had a blue bodysuit with stripes on. It had a tail, and she had made her entire face blue with some Halloween makeup. It looked… odd. 

“I’m a Na’vi.” she shouted over the music. Wayne stared at her blankly. “From Avatar. It’s a movie. They’re this alien race.” 

“Oh.” said Wayne. He looked the outfit over again. Something about the colour seemed off to him. Maybe it was because he had seen how blue skin actually looked, that it had different shades and subtle flushes where the blood was pumping underneath the skin. Vanessa’s face obviously just had a bunch of paint slobbered all over it. “I haven’t seen it.” 

Vanessa frowned and looked towards the dance-floor. “Wanna dance?” 

Wayne had taken ballroom-lessons as a child. This was obviously not that kind of dance. Humans were rhythmically grinding up against each other, moving along with the heavy base the DJ, dressed out as Donald Duck, was spinning. 

“Sure.” he said. Sometimes you had to pretend to have fun to actually  _ have _ fun. That’s how he had made it through a lot of company dinners with his parents. Wayne finished his vodka in one quick sweep, and they went to the dance floor. 

Moving without accidentally hurting someone was difficult for him. Metro Man was a lot stronger than a human, so if he bumped into people there was a real chance they would fly across the room, but they made it work. Vanessa rubbed her blue tail against him, her arms over her head and against Wayne’s shoulders. They danced close and Wayne could smell the paint starting to break up because of sweat and movement. 

Metro Man didn’t get tired, but after an hour Vanessa leaned up to his ear. “Wanna take some air?” She asked. Wayne nodded and together they went outside. 

Outside it had turned dark and the air was chillier. Wayne took a deep breath and looked up at the sky. Vanessa was talking about her work as a sales-clerk at H&M as she with clever fingers brought out and lit a cigarette. 

“So, what do you do?” she asked and took a drag. Wayne looked down at himself. He was dressed in his super-hero suit, wasn’t it pretty obvious? He had been flying everywhere. Wayne gestured to his chest and Vanessa looked embarrassed. “Oh, right.”

She fiddled with the cigarette. The smell of it was starting to fill the air. Vanessa hesitated a moment, then she met his eyes. 

“I just wanted to say,” she said hesitantly, biting her lip and chipping some paint off her lips in the process. He could hear her excited heartbeat in the night. “A lot of people appreciate what you do.  _ I _ appreciate what you do.” 

She tilted her head up towards him and leaned over to him. Her eyelids fluttered close. Time started to slow down as Wayne hesitated. Vanessa seemed like a nice girl underneath that ridiculous costume.

‘Why not?’ he thought and kissed her. 

She tasted like a mixture of cigarette smoke and blue paint. Together it made a metallic, slightly damp, taste in his mouth. Vanessa put a hand behind his head and laced her fingers into his hair. The kiss deepened and Vanessa pressed them closer together. 

Wayne should pull away. They were in an open street with lots of drunk people around them. Anyone could see them and then news would be all over Metro City that he had been seen making out with a random woman in the street. 

Last time people thought he was cheated on Roxanne Wayne had got actual hate mail. It had made him feel so awkward and bad that he had convinced Roxanne to follow him to the next couple of parties and pretend to be his girlfriend so it would all settle down again. 

But Wayne was always so fucking careful. Always presenting so people would see him the right way. The only time he didn’t have to hold anything back was when he and Megamind was playing the Game; and otherwise he was always careful. He wanted to be uncareful for a little bit. 

So Wayne got his hand into Vanessa’s hair too and kissed her until she had to break away for air. She looked at him with half-lidded eyes, a hopeful smile spreading over her face. The paint was all smeared around. 

She was just about to say something when she was interrupted. “ _ Metro Mahn _ ?” 

Wayne knew that voice. He twisted around and yes, there was Megamind, wearing a much more casual suit — not his battle armour. That made Metro Man relax a little, but only a little. 

Megamind glanced between Metro Man and Vanessa. His eyes carefully took in Vanessa's blue suit and make-up. The green eyes focused on where the colour had smeared around her lips and he frowned. Megamind and he made eye contact again. Wayne held his breath. 

There was silence. Vanessa clung to Wayne’s arm in fright, and then Megamind’s entire face rearranged from surprise into a more villainous look. 

“Don’t let me interrupt,” he said in a bored drawl. “I can tell you’re busy, and really, so am I. Halloween isn’t going to ah-rrange itself.” 

Again their eyes locked. Megamind looked hesitant for a millisecond, then he twisted around with a flourish. “Ciao!” 

Megamind was quick when he wanted to, so it just took a moment and then he was gone. Metro Man stared after him. Vanessa squeezed his arm. 

“Metro Man?” she said shakily. Wayne didn’t look at her, but instead rose up into flight and quickly dashed after the super villain. 

Megamind had come three streets away when Wayne caught up with him. 

“Buddy,” Wayne said, appearing in front of him and stopping his flight. Megamind’s face fell and he glared at him. 

“My name is  _ Megamind _ ,” he growled and sidestepped him. Wayne floated after him. 

“Where are you going?” Metro Man asked. Megamind glanced sideways at him and pressed his lips together. 

“None of your business,” he said. “It’s not  _ illegal _ to walk on streets, Metro Mahn.” 

Metro Man stopped him with a hand on his shoulder. Megamind tensed up like he expected a fight, but when nothing happened his green eyes narrowed. 

“Are you going to tell me what you’ve done with my pod?” asked Metro Man. Megamind shrugged him off, then smirked. 

“No, I think not. I’d rather it be a surprise.” Wayne sighed. 

“Listen, can we talk for a second?” 

“We are,” said Megamind dryly. 

“About last time.” said Metro Man. Megamind groaned and started walking again. 

“God, you’re like a broken record,” he whined and gestured widely with his hands. “ _ ‘Can we talk, Megamind? I’m sorry, Megamind. I want to eat you, Megamind!’ _ ” 

“I don’t want to eat you!” Wayne snapped. Megamind turned to face him, his face suddenly dangerous. He pushed a hand against Wayne’s chest, hard. It didn’t hurt, but it was a definite force. 

“No, you just want to beat the crap out of me so I’ll bleed and you can get a boner!” Megamind snapped, glaring harshly at him. “There’s people like you in prison,  _ Wayne _ , with devious appetites.”

The way Megamind said devious almost made him sound like he was purring. His eyes glinted like green steel. “Are you sure it’s  _ me _ that belongs behind bars?” 

Wayne flinched but didn’t slink away. 

“Look, I’m sorry, okay?” He sighed and rubbed his neck. “I didn’t know what I was saying, I was exhausted.” 

Megamind eyed him suspiciously. 

“You don’t get exhausted,” he said. 

“Yeah, well, I was.” said Wayne. “My head wasn’t in the Game that day.” Megamind was silent, his head crooked to the side as he thought it through. 

“Your blue girlfriend is waiting for you,” was all he said. Megamind started walking again. 

“She’s not my girlfriend.” Megamind snorted. 

“Oh, apologies,” he said cheerfully. “Your blue prostitute is waiting for you.” 

Wayne frowned. His skin was itchy like he was ready for a fight. That Megamind seemed intent on leaving bothered him. He floated after him. “She’s not that either.” 

“That blueberry-jam all over your face says otherwise.” Megamind glanced back at him, clearly annoyed that he was being followed. “It looks like you blew a smurf.” 

“Buddy, come on.” 

Megamind twisted around again. 

“I’m not Buddy,” he snapped. 

“So why does it say that on your licence?” snapped Metro Man. 

“ _ I _ don’t  _ have _ a licence.” he said, offended, with a hand over his heart. “And that piece of paper your town calls a ‘birth-certificate’ is just some bullshit the Warden signed to get the state off of his back.” 

Metro Man rolled his eyes. 

“Whatever,” he said. It suddenly struck him that he had known Megamind basically his entire life, yet if they weren’t playing the Game they had absolutely nothing to say to each other. 

Was this… normal? Wayne honestly couldn’t tell. Megamind took up a huge part of his life — way more than any friend he had. He was starting to have a mending relationship with Roxanne again, slowly rebuilding what he had fucked up between them, but Megamind was basically the only reason he interacted with her, too. 

Besides today, Wayne couldn’t remember the last time he went somewhere for any other reason than Metro Man-stuff. He cleared his throat and held out a hand. 

“So, we’re friends?” 

Megamind stared at the offered hand like it was poisonous. He glanced up at him and raised an eyebrow. 

“You’re kidding, right?” he asked. Metro Man shook his head. Megamind snorted and slapped the hand away. “We are most certainly not friends.

“We’ve never been  _ friends _ ,” he hissed and glared at him. “We’re  _ rivals _ . I’m the bad guy, you’re the good guy.” 

Metro Man grimaced. 

“Well aren’t you tired of that?” he asked, frustrated. “We have done the same silly charade our entire lives!” 

Megamind blinked in surprise then his face scrunched up like he had bitten something sour. 

“No! Of course I’m not tired, I’m the  _ bad guy! _ ” He shouted, eyes huge. “What else am I supposed to do?” 

Metro Man rolled his eyes. “Yeah, wonder what an actual  _ genius  _ could do with his life?” 

“Are you mocking me?” said Megamind with a frown. “Because we’re not ten any more, such tricks won’t work on me.” 

“I’m not mocking you,” said Wayne with what he hoped was kindness in his voice. “You’re one of the best inventors this world have ever seen, I’m sure there're loads of things you could be doing.” 

“Yes, because we can all just quit our destinies and live happily ever after,” snarled Megamind. Wayne could see contempt colour his eyes darker. “What would the great Metro Mahn do, I wonder? Who would he be without all the helpless people of Metrocity?” 

Wayne hesitated. Megamind hadn’t known it, but he had accidentally stumbled onto something Metro Man had been thinking late at night, staring through the ceiling. Could he be something without Metro City? If he wasn’t the city’s hero, who was he? 

“Look,” said Wayne and tried to pick himself up. “I just mean, we get each other.” 

Megamind laughed, startled. “We do?” 

“Don’t we?” asked Metro Man. Megamind crooked his head and seemed to consider it. As he did he wrapped his arms around him and shivered a little against the cold. Metro Man knew temperatures could really mess the other up, and since Megamind was without his usual set-up Metro Man assumed he also didn’t have built-in heaters in what he was wearing right now. 

“I’m gonna go now,” he said determinedly. “Go back to your groupies, Metro Mahn.”

“Oh my god, can’t you just listen to me,” Wayne snapped, fighting the urge to hold Megamind down. 

“What, then?” Megamind snapped back at him and gestured widely with his hands. “What do you want?”

Wayne was fell silent. Megamind waited, then he snorted. 

“You don’t even  _ know _ what you want, Scott, except to constantly nag at me!” 

Wayne pushed Megamind into the wall and kissed him. Passionately. Megamind was shorter than him, but as his back hit the wall he somehow angled his body perfectly to let Wayne press closer. Megamind tasted sweet like he’d snacked on candied apples or something recently. It tasted good, less weird than Vanessa had tasted. 

Megamind made a sound, a mix between a startled gasp and something else, something rawer that shot electric sparks all the way through Wayne. His hands went around Megamind’s body, pulling him close to him while still keeping him pressed against the wall. 

Megamind made that raw sound again and grabbed the edge of Wayne’s suit. He didn’t push him away, but rather it seemed like he tried to pull Wayne closer as well. It felt amazing. Wayne wasn’t really a kisser — it never appealed to him. It was just wet and vaguely tickled him, but Megamind’s weight against him felt right; the way Megamind’s body ached into him and the way he kissed; harsh and starving; took Wayne’s breath away. 

His body felt on fire and every gasp Megs made travelled directly through him down to his groin. Wayne was getting erect, and through the durable fabric of his suit he felt Megamind’s body to the same. 

Wayne growled and grinded against him. Megamind moaned, leaning into it before he pulled his mouth away from their lip-lock. Wayne kept him locked by the wall, but stilled everything else. He stared at Megamind’s face, noting the rich flush across his cheeks and the way his big green eyes blinked, a little unfocused into nothing. Megamind kept clutching onto Wayne’s suit. 

“Are you okay?” asked Wayne. Megamind’s eyes focused on him and he licked his lips, slowly. Wayne could see his brain kicking in and starting to work over-time and that’s when he knew the moment was over. Wayne pulled away reluctantly. 

“Do you want me to walk you home?” he asked, keeping his voice as neutral and innocent as he could. His body still burned, but he wasn’t about to do anything Megamind didn’t want or wasn’t ready for. By the panic Wayne could see blossom up in those green eyes, Megamind didn’t want anything at all from him. 

“No,” Megamind gasped, but his voice was strange. He almost seemed unsteady on his feet. Wayne summoned all his Metro Man strength and took another step away from Megamind. His body was already screaming at him to press Megamind back up against the wall and taste that flushed, blue pulse underneath his lips. He wanted to fly them anywhere and pull those black clothes off the other in a frenzy. 

“Okay,” said Wayne instead. Megamind nodded distantly. It didn’t look like he was fully present. “Are you alright, Buddy?” 

Megamind didn’t shout at him for calling him by his human name. It didn’t even seem to register.

“I really should go,” he said and carefully pushed off against the wall. Wayne watched as he started to make his way down the street. 

“Let me walk you home,” Wayne pleaded. No matter what he may feel, it didn’t seem right to let Megamind stumble off in his state. It was such an odd reaction — Megs almost seemed drugged. Wayne watched Megamind take another few steps, then Megamind glanced back. 

“Fine.” he said crankily and carried on. Metro Man flew to go by his side. 

“I could fly us.” 

“No!” Megamind gave him a look, then he stared out into the dark. Wayne was hoovering next to him, feeling like a stack of ants had started to crawl all over his skin. He rubbed his neck uncomfortably. 

“Sorry,” he said quietly. “If I… stepped over a line, back there.” 

Megamind actually started to laugh. The sound was a surprise, but a welcome one. Wayne glanced at him and could see some colour really returning to Megamind’s cheeks. 

“This is what you consider out of the line?” asked Megamind. “I would have thought we had passed that a while ago.” 

“Well, yeah,” said Wayne and looked ahead. Suddenly he really wished his suit had pockets so he could find a natural place for his hands. “I guess we have, but… I still feel like this was different.” 

“Oh, I agree.” Megamind shook his head. “So fucking different.” 

Megamind sighed and pulled his outfit closer around him. Wayne hesitated for a second, then he stopped Megamind with a hand on his shoulder again, unclasped his cape and hung it over Megamind’s slighter frame. Megamind glanced down at the white piece of cloth. 

“I took your stupid pod because I thought it might have information, okay?” he said stiffly and started walking again. Wayne thought back at what Roxanne had said, about there being something about how to destroy him. His stomach dropped like a stone. Megamind didn’t seem to notice. “I figured, maybe it said something about us and our home worlds.” 

Wayne raised his head and watched the other curiously. “Does it?” 

“Well, it says something,” said Megamind hesitantly. “There’s an insane amount of data, but it’s encoded. I haven’t been able to crack it.” 

“Oh.” Wayne felt… disappointed, he realized. Their home worlds had been such a weird concept to him. He didn’t like thinking about it, but he must have had a family; parents, maybe siblings. Megamind too. Suddenly he felt guilty for not thinking about it. Their families were gone, and the only ones left to honour them — Wayne — ignored their very existence most of the time. 

“Maybe,” Megamind said slowly, glancing over to him. He had an unreadable expression on his face, one he often wore when he’d just thought of something. “Maybe you could unlock it.” 

“How?” Wayne frowned. “I don’t know anything about it, I didn’t even know it could open like that before I saw you unlock it at the museum.” 

“It brought you here.” said Megamind and stroked his goatee. “If it’s locked to your DNA it might have protocols waiting for you to access them.” 

“But I have no idea how to do that,” Wayne argued. “I don’t remember anything about our planets — not like you do.” 

Megamind’s face darkened and he shuddered. If Wayne didn’t have super-vision he wouldn’t have caught it at all. 

“Maybe it doesn’t matter.” he said slowly. “They were clearly advanced societies, and your pod’s a fucking limousine. It might just read your energy-signal now when I’ve opened it and tell us all we need to know.” 

Wayne thought about it. That maybe made sense. Megamind had certainly made lots of devices that just read him or activated when he got close, so maybe his people could have done that as well. 

“We could give it a try,” Wayne said. Megamind looked at him, and Wayne thought he saw a sliver of hope glimmer to life in those green eyes. 

“Yeah,” said Megamind with a nod. “Yeah, let’s do it.” 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Okay, I love the idea of Megamind's "real" "human" name being Buddy, except that it's really fucking sad. I can just imagine him in school, desperately trying to make friends and fit in, and then being called the one thing he never becomes with someone. Now I've made myself depressed.


	7. Maths

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Megamind and Metro Man tries to solve the mysteries of Metro Man's pod and have a rather philosophical discussion about alien and maths.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I dedicate this chapter to Blue_Oyster_Cult, because their comments made me really happy!

Metro Man had been in Megamind’s lair before. Of course he had. Yet it felt completely different when he stepped into it that night. 

“Don’t wake Minion,” Megamind said in a hushed voice, leading him into the main area of the lair. Megamind quickly glanced around and rushed to pull a curtain through the space. “And no peeking!” 

Wayne grinned faintly but nodded his head. By a bunch of monitors he could see his pod, that weird new hatch opened up. It was plugged up with a bunch of wires to a computer and all the monitors were showing the same weird symbols, over and over again. 

“What is this?” he said and took a closer look. It didn’t look like anything to him. Wayne had seen the Matrix and that was pretty much his source info about code. Megamind joined him by the monitors and looked at it emptily. 

“That is what information looks like when it’s stored, before it’s translated into words.” he said slowly like he was talking to a child. Wayne frowned. 

“I thought that was all like ones and zeros.” Megamind glanced at him with a raised eyebrow. 

“Wayne, it’s  _ alien _ ,” he said. “You can’t assume maths from an entire different planet looks anything like it does on Earth.” 

“But I thought that maths’ a universal language,” Wayne looked at him. Megamind snorted and looked incredibly amused. 

“And by universal, you mean just Earth, right?” He shook his head. “That’s your sample-size, right? Of course, it is, because besides you, me and Minion, there are no known extraterrestrial life, as far as Earth knows. Granted, whether maths exist or not is really a matter of whether things, people, places, objects are a product of our understanding of them, or if they have a plutonic existence beyond that understanding.” 

“I know some of those words, but together they make no sense.” said Wayne. Megamind hummed in the back of his throat, then he picked up two screwdrivers and held them out.

“Imagine it like this,” he said and gestured with the tools. “If we weren’t here to count these, would it matter that there are two of them?” 

“Well, it is two.” said Wayne hesitantly. Megamind nodded. 

“Yes, but does it  _ matter _ ?” he asked. “If no one’s here to count them, and then they get destroyed — say with your laser-vision. Every trace of them, obliterated. Does it matter that there were two? Or is the very notion of counting them in the first place dependent on someone with the ability to count them?” 

“I mean…” Wayne frowned and glanced between the tools as if they’d give him some clues. “If there are two screwdrivers there are two screwdrivers.” 

“If you want to claim that they have a plutonic existence, then yes,” said Megamind with a shrug. “But if no one is there to recognize them as screwdrivers, it doesn’t really matter what they are. If no one knows what they’re for, they can’t be used as screwdrivers, and if they can’t be used as screwdrivers, then in the end, it doesn’t really matter that they  _ are _ screwdrivers. Or that there are two of them, because they’re only conceptualized if we notice them, categorize or use them. 

“In a simplified form, maths can be understood as understanding order,” Megamind continued. “That’s what it is used for, as a sort of pattern and organisation-system. To understand or recognize order a being needs to be able to conceptualize and understand at least the significance of 2. This being needs to be able to tell that there are more than one thing and also understand that these things are similar in some way. If they are not similar, clumping them together doesn’t accomplish anything, it just creates chaos, which is the opposite of order.

“So, your understanding of maths as a universal language is actually a capability to recognize order. Since this capability is shared by, if perhaps not all humans on Earth then pretty damn close to all — maths is considered a shared and understood processing of order and pattern.” Megamind took a deep breath and continued his explanation. “However, you can not assume that aliens have the same way of conceptualizing or even processing the world as humans do. Even we, literally aliens, have grown up on Earth and therefore might very well have learned and adapted to an Earth-like way of understanding reality that might have been vastly different if we have grown up on our home planets with our peoples.” 

“So what you’re saying is that they had other ways of counting?” 

“I’m saying that they might not have necessarily been able to count in the way we understand counting at all.” 

They grew silent. Wayne looked at the monitors, watching that gibberish slowly move forward across the screen and feeling a bit light-headed. 

“So, even if we got into this thing, we might not learn anything from it at all?” he asked. “I mean, it’s probably written in their language, too, right? And we don’t know that language either.” 

“Possibly, but there’s a difference in trying to  _ break  _ into something and trying to interpret something.” Megamind said slowly. “They were obviously intelligent people, otherwise they wouldn’t have been able to send us here. And intelligence executed to the level it took to sent us away requires some kind of order — repetitions in all the data. Right now the mainframe is locked, which means its whole purpose at the moment is to keep unauthorized people away from the data inside. If we could bypass the security at least the mainframe wouldn’t be fighting against us.” 

“Okay,” said Wayne and nodded. He wasn’t going to try pretend he understood all of this fully, but if anyone could try to figure it out it would be Megamind. What he had said  _ had  _ made kind of sense, so to Megamind it probably was even clearer. He faced the other. “So how do we do that?”

Megamind frowned and bend down to the pod. 

“To be honest I was hoping it would just react to you.” he said and probed it with a screwdriver. “Give me a second.” 

In front of Wayne’s very eyes, Megamind started to deconstruct the pod. To Wayne, it had always looked like a solid piece with a hatch that opened to a little bed, but Megamind kept finding more and more ways to take it apart. Then, Megamind made that curious hum in the back of his throat again and reassembled it to mint condition.

“Well?” asked Wayne. 

“It doesn’t make sense that you’d have to pull it apart,” Megamind mused, more to himself than Wayne. He picked the white bed out and stared at the underside. All Wayne could see was a mess of tiny wires and weird lamps, but it must have made sense to Megamind because he nodded. “Perhaps my first idea isn’t so far off - 

“Wayne, put your hand here!” Megamind pointed where he wanted him. Wayne did as he said and waited. Nothing happened. 

“Now what?” he said. Megamind furrowed his eyebrows. 

“Try to activate it.” 

“How?” 

“I don’t know,” said Megamind frustratedly and pursed his lips. “It’s not identifying you as the pilot.” 

“It was worth a shot,” Wayne said and pulled his hand away. Megamind looked at him. 

“Oh, we’re not done,” he said and bounced up. “First rule of being  _ Evil _ , if at first you don’t succeed, try again!” 

“That’s not — that’s not a rule about being  _ Evil _ ,” said Wayne with a frown. Megamind scoffed. 

“Oh, what do you know?” he said nonchalantly and went to grab a few things.

Wayne watched at Megamind connected a few extra cables to the pod and started writing on a monitor, and then the other seemed to get completely absorbed by his work. Wayne took the moment to look around. There was a bunch of junk everywhere — scraps of metal that looked like Megamind and Minion had fished it out of a scrapyard, tesla coils and blinking lights that seemed to serve no other purpose than an evil aesthetic. 

Metro Man walked over to a machine the size of a fridge. It looked like a really old-school computer, the kind Wayne had seen in pictures and films about NASA. He peered at it, but even taking a look on the inside with his laser-vision told him nothing about it. It was plugged up to something, but that something kind of just like a huge fan. Wayne raised a finger and carefully tapped on a light-bulb. A lightning bolt shot out and zapped his finger. It surprised him more than it hurt, but Metro Man released a quick little growl. 

“What did you do?” asked Megamind. Wayne looked over his shoulder. 

“Nothing, the thing -” but Megamind wasn’t paying attention to him. He was staring at the pod that had started to glow, a bright, golden light. Wayne flew over. “What did  _ you _ do?” 

Megamind glanced up at him as the light faded. His green eyes sparkled with excitement. 

“Do that sound again.” he ordered. Wayne furrowed his eyebrows. 

“What sound?” 

Megamind cleared his throat and almost perfectly copied the growl Metro Man had released. Wayne felt weird. The pod started to glow again. Megamind laughed. 

“Of course, it’s all about sound.” he said and shook his head. “I should have thought of that sooner.” 

“You’re in it, then?” Megamind glanced at him. 

“I know how to activate it, now.” he said and stroked his goatee. The bright glow started to fade again from the pod. “It seems to only working for a short period of, though. Maybe it needs a command after it’s activated.” 

He stood up and walked past the red curtain. Metro Man did his best not to peek after him. Instead, he leaned down over the pod, bit his lip, then shrugged. 

“Activate,” he commanded. Nothing happened. 

“What are you doing?” said Megamind. Wayne flipped around. 

“Nothing!” Megamind came back, gave him a once-over and shook his head. In his hands he held a stereo and a microphone. He handed the thing over to Wayne. 

“Record the sound.” he said and went back to the monitor. Wayne looked down at the stereo. 

“Uh…” 

“I’ll need the sound to be able to activate the pod properly.” Megamind explained. Wayne hesitated. 

“Yeah, but I’m here.” he said. Megamind looked up with a surprised look on his face. He seemed to consider it. 

“Do you plan on staying here long?” he asked flatly. 

“Well,” said Wayne and fidget. “I mean, till we figure this out, at least.”

“We’ve just managed to turn the power on,” said Megamind slowly. “It’s not unlocked, so I’m guessing it’ll still require some hacking to get past that. 

“It’s going to take time.” he said definitely and turned back to his monitor. “You can’t be here when Minion wakes up.” 

“Oh.” said Wayne. His heart fell a little. “Yeah, sure.”

He didn’t know quite how he felt, being dismissed by Megamind, but he didn’t want to leave. “I’ll just… record this then.” 

“If you would,” said Megamind calmly without looking at him. 

Wayne fiddled a little with the stereo, then placed it down. It was an old thing, the kind Wayne had as a kid and recorded songs on in the living room. He picked up the microphone, pressed ‘record’ and made the harshest growl he could think of. 

The pod beeped and started glowing. Megamind stilled and stared at him, frozen in place. Wayne glanced between him and the pod. 

“Uh… sorry.” Megamind took a deep, shaky breath. 

“That’s… fine.” he pressed out through his lips. He looked pale, like all blood had rushed from his face. “I’ll, uh, see what I can do and get back to you.” 

Wayne watched him closely. 

“Are you okay?” he asked. Megamind’s expression changed into something annoyed. 

“I swear to Evil Science, Wayne, if you don’t get out soon I won’t tell you shit.” he snapped. Wayne shut his mouth and nodded slowly. 

“Okay, I’ll — go.” He looked Megamind over. “How will you contact me?” 

Megamind pursed his lips and barely contained his eye-roll. “I’ll figure it out,  _ Metro Mahn. _ ” 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'd like to thank professor J.B Nation at the Department of Mathematics, University of Hawaii, for his paper debating whether or not aliens would know or understand math the way that we on Earth do. If anyone is interested it's called "How Aliens Do Math" and shows up with a simple Google-search. It was a really interesting read, and coming from someone who considers maths her absolute worst subject, it was surprisingly easy to understand. 
> 
> Please leave a comment if you enjoyed!


	8. the Docks

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Roxanne is doing some investigations, which leads her to a potential scheme of Megamind's, but Metro Man doesn't seem that interested in it.

Roxanne’s day was not going well. To start off, she had been late for work. That  _ never _ happened. She was always reliable and showed up at least half an hour early, which was just enough time to settle down, drink a cup of coffee in peace, go over her schedule and clear her head. But she had slept through the alarm, and when she finally woke up she had just enough time to toss on the same outfit she’d worn yesterday and try to make it to KMCP without missing the first two hours. 

She hadn’t been sleeping well, lately. Or rather, she had been so focused on working this new angle that she had accidentally stayed up till 4 am the last couple of nights which was now backfiring, big time. 

It was just — Megamind had been unusually quiet lately. Halloween was his greatest season, and she hadn’t heard so much as a peep or seen even the briefest flash of the invisible car roll past even once. She couldn’t help but feel it had something to do with him breaking into the Metro Man Museum and stealing Metro Man’s pod. Maybe it really had the ability to make a great weapon and Megamind was about to unleash horrible things on Metro City, or it contained something that could be used against Metro Man. Roxanne was sure that Megamind wouldn’t stop until he reached his goal, and she was worried what that might be. 

Then, when Roxanne finally rushed into the office Hal had greeted her and accidentally tripped her, so she spilled coffee all over herself. Luckily, Lisa Brook-Sanchez had borrowed out a spare shirt she always kept in her bag and Roxanne had been able to change into something clean. Work had gone relatively smoothly after that, and she had been able to stay at her desk and work on a few pieces, but the day had been slow. 

She found herself coming back to the subject of Megamind, wondering what he was up to. Surely he would do something for Halloween. It was practically a given. Roxanne had spent months thinking of a costume, and she wasn’t going to see all that hard work go to waste. And Roxanne knew that at the end of the day, Megamind was paying her bills. The people of Metro City wanted the details, the scoop of what their main supervillain and what they’re beloved super-hero was up to. She needed Megamind’s plans because that’s what’s kept her in a gorgeous corner-apartment with a big balcony at the best spot in town. Her building had a doorman who knew her by name. She was living the sweet life, here, and Megamind better deliver. 

It wasn’t just professional interest though. She was curious. Why had Megamind stolen Metro Man’s pod? That sounded like something that he could have taken a long time ago if he wanted it. Granted, he may not have thought about it until recently, but still… it was odd. Megamind usually build his own devices. If there was one thing he was good at it was inventing things. They didn’t always work, but the actual engineerical ingenuity behind the devices — usually solid. 

Minion’s body was one of those things, for instance. The devices build for fighting could break down at any time, but Roxanne had never seen Minion’s suit malfunction. It just worked. She didn’t even know how; she couldn’t tell how Minion controlled it, even. To her it looked like Minion just floated around in that glass ball of his, but he had full control over the gorilla-suit. She had seen him execute Megamind’s lavish plans, to fighting Metro Man or another villain, and she had even seen him bake cookies, and decorate said cookies to exceptional detail, once where a snow-storm halted the evil plan for a few hours. 

So, sometimes Megamind’s plans just worked, and sometimes absolutely nothing about it made sense. But Roxanne also knew that Megamind never did anything without a reason, which is why she felt like the pod had to be significant somehow. 

She had poured over the VHS-tape several times, trying to discern anything from the video, but unfortunately Megamind hadn’t given away any clues as to what he was up to. The blue alien usually wore his expressions on his sleeve, but he looked oddly flat in the video. It was only when he made eye contact with the security camera and blew that kiss that she recognized his usual persona. 

It felt a little disconcerting, actually. Obviously Megamind knew that they would be stumped about why he took the pod, and she felt like he was mocking her. Something about that devilish grin right before he blew the kiss, the miniscule hesitation where it almost looked like he’d rather raise his middle finger at the camera… 

He was definitely taunting Metro Man. 

Roxanne sighed and leaned back into her chair. She ought to focus on work — like, real, actual work that she had to do before Megamind kidnapped her again. From her purse she heard her phone beep, and she fished it out of the bag. 

It was a text from one of her sources, short and cryptical.

‘Shade going at the docks — meet at M-brigde, 16.30. K.’ 

It was rather mystical, Roxanne thought, but she also knew that K was one of the most reliable sources in Metro City, and she couldn’t afford to disregard her. Roxanne glanced at the time, noting that if she left now she’d have time to stop by the café and buy K a sandwich before she made it to the bridge. Roxanne collected her stuff in a hurry and popped her head into her boss’ door before she headed out. 

“Hey, Carl, I have a few leads I thought to check out, that okay?” Carl, a middle-aged black man, and a bit of a silver-fox, looked up at her. 

“Something dangerous?” he asked. She smiled, thankful that he wanted to look out for her. She thought it over for a second. K had been rather short. 

“Potentially,” she settled on. Carl nodded. 

“Okay, call me when you’re out of the woods.” Roxanne saluted him and dashed of to the elevator. Just as the doors started to close she saw Hal rushing to catch the elevator, and she knew she should hold it, but then the doors slid close and the elevator started moving. 

‘Well, Hal can wait to the next elevator,’ she thought and shook her head. The café she usually took her lunch-break at was just around the corner from work, and Roxanne went in and ordered one of the biggest sandwiches to-go, then she called a taxi and went over to the Metro Bridge.

The bridge was a lovely walk-promenade with a view over the bay. In the middle of it there was a rest stop where people could have picnics and enjoy the views. It was also a public place where people rarely noticed who met up and talked to each other. There was a kind of privacy in the open space, and Roxanne knew it was a favourite spot for K. 

She walked over to the rest stop and leaned against the railing, breathing in the fresh water air. It was getting cold now, and Roxanne wouldn’t be surprised if it started to snow any day now. She didn’t have to wait long until K appeared next to her, peering at her nervously. 

Roxanne smiled and handed the sandwich over to K. K was young, maybe nineteen, but Roxanne would guess she had been homeless for a few years by now. She had never managed to get the full story, but from what Roxanne had been able to puzzle together over the years she knew that the girl had been kicked out by her parents when she came out as trans, and that she hadn’t met with her parents since then. 

Roxanne felt bad for her, she really did. Roxanne knew that feeling; of trying to hide who you were and worrying that someone would find out and how they would react. She had eventually had a good experience with her family, but she knew that a huge portion of LGBTQ-people were not so lucky. Just in America the percentage of homeless LGBTQ-kids were between 11 and 40 percent, and Roxanne was leaning towards the higher estimate. It was hard keeping statistic like that, so she assumed that the hidden number was even larger. 

K didn’t want pity though. She would accept a sandwich, and once, when the weather had been terrible she had allowed Roxanne to get her a place at a shelter for the night. Any other kind of offering was met with a blank refusal. It wasn’t like Roxanne could shelter every trans kid with a sad story she found, either. 

“There’s something weird going on at the docks,” K said and took a bite of the sandwich. She had gained some weight, Roxanne noticed, rather pleased. She hoped that meant that K wasn’t using Psycho Delic’s drugs any more. 

“Weird how?” she asked. K glanced around to make sure no one listened in on them. 

“There're loud sounds from a warehouse, and cars and boats coming and going all through the night.” 

“What kind of sounds?” said Roxanne. 

“Guns,” said K. “Definitely guns. And there’s some crazy security going on, big guys, look like they’re military or something.” 

Based on K’s expression Roxanne decided she knew what she was talking about. 

“Guns…” Roxanne mused thoughtfully. Could it be Megamind? Metro Man did say that his first thought had been that Megamind was building some kind of weapon using the stolen technology. “Have you seen Megamind there, K? Or some brain-bots?” 

“Nah, no one’s seen Megamind in a while,” K said and shook her head. “Just the guards.” 

Roxanne frowned. 

“Are you sure?” she asked. K gave her a look and Roxanne raised her hands in surrender. “Okay. Thanks, K — I’ll look into it.” 

K didn’t answer, but Roxanne could see how she hesitated. The girl shifted from one foot to the other and eventually made up her mind. 

“I don’t like ‘em. They’re brutal, and the whole thing just seems fishy.” K rubbed her arm nervously. “I mean, the docks are usually safe, you know?” 

Roxanne crocked her head to the side and regarded her. She shook her head and have an apologetic but what she hoped was an encouraging smile. 

“No, sorry.” she said. “What do you mean, that the docks are safe?” 

K seemed to struggle how to express herself. 

“Like, you know,  _ safer. _ Megamind controls the dock-area, so everything usually goes through him.” She shrugged uncomfortably. “Like, even the big-dealers respect him, you know? You don’t misbehave in the docks.” 

Roxanne pursed her lips and thought about it. Keeping the bay under control would actually be a smart move; they had a big port with lots of traffic, and she assumed Megamind could accept and transport a lot of illegal goods through the ships. 

“Where exactly in the docks have you seen these guys?” asked Roxanne. This definitely needed further investigation. 

* * *

Roxanne had made it home to her apartment when she called Carl. K’s info was interesting, but she wanted to see what else she could dig up before she shared it with her boss. Carl was satisfied that she was safe and wished her a good weekend.

“Don’t work yourself to death,” he said before they said good-bye. Roxanne laughed and hung up on him. Then she went over to her computer and started to pull up some information about the dock-area. 

Metro City Bay had been a blossoming import and export site for quite a while, but eventually it took a turn for the worse. It was still a hub of import, but Scott Financial had been forced to close down a huge part of the industry, and the Bay Area had taken a hit from that. That seemed to have made way to some criminal behaviour — theft, assault and drug-dealing had been reported. Then, strangely enough the reports had started to go down again about ten years ago. Now, even through it still seemed to be a place of drug-abuse and just generally a place for societies outcasts and unwanted, K seemed to be right with saying that the docks were  _ safe _ . Statistically it was a calmer area for violent crimes than certain other places in the city, at least. 

Roxanne wondered what that meant, that people behaved to not anger Megamind. She had to admit, besides Megamind’s very public fights against Metro Man, he was a lot more private with other aspects of his villain career. Yes, he was the flashiest of Metro City’s villains by far, but every other day Roxanne heard horrible tales about other super-villains attacking other cities or causing massive destruction. 

Megamind was a menace, and he certainly spread a trail of destruction around him, but it also seemed like he had some kind of hold over the other villains in town. Maybe he really did control the city — the spider in the web that were pulling all the strings. 

He certainly knew how to get out of jail, well enough; it wouldn’t surprise Roxanne if he had a list of corrupt guards in his pocket that aided with his escapes. And if he could get to people like that, it made sense he could get to others just as easily. 

Roxanne knew Megamind was a bit of a bumbling idiot. She had seen him loose to Metro Man more times than she could count. She knew that more times than not, his plans backfired in his face. Yet, she also had the suspicion that Megamind could do a lot more damage if he wanted. Megamind wanted the spotlight, first of all. Causing mischief was second to that, and mixed with an unhealthy dose of anti-establishment, that combination had proved to create the unstable super-genius that was Megamind. 

Roxanne knew she needed to update Metro Man on what she had learned, though. Megamind would sooner or later actually succeed in one of his plans, and that could be catastrophic for the city. She fished out her phone and dialled Metro Man’s number. 

“Hello?” said Metro Man. 

“Hey, Wayne, it’s Roxanne.” 

“Roxie.” Wayne sounded a little odd, but Roxanne pushed the thought away. She had more exciting things to share. “What’s up?” 

“I’ve been doing some digging into your pod,” Roxanne said and looked at the old pictures for the dock on her computer. “Something big seems to be going on at the docks. Could be Megamind.” 

“Yeah…” said Wayne hesitantly. She could almost see him rub his neck like he did when he was uncomfortable. “Well, I’ve kind of already figured that out.” 

Roxanne blinked. “Oh. Since when? How?” 

Metro Man was silent on the other end. 

“Wayne?” she asked. 

“Yeah, just, you don’t have to worry about the pod any more.” he said. Roxanne frowned. 

“Okay, but -” 

“Listen, Roxie, I gotta go, the Mayor’s calling.” 

“Yes, sure,” said Roxanne hesitantly. Wayne hung up without saying good-bye. When had Wayne figured out the Pod-thing? And why hadn’t he told her about it? 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> It's 3 am and I need to write an essay tomorrow. I'm basically Roxanne. I should try and sort out my sleeping-schedule, but instead I'm here, writing Megamind fan fic. Why do I do this to myself? Dx


	9. cloud

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Halloween does not go according to plan, but Roxanne Ritchi isn't about to let something like Megamind not showing up stop her from getting to the truth.

“Sir,” said Minion. He wasn’t playing any more. Megamind could hear the shift of tone in his voice. Minion was serious now. Megamind ignored his henchman and continued typing away on the screen. He preferred to build, to be honest, but cracking Metro Man’s damn pod was taking over his mind. 

“Okay, that’s it!” Minion snapped when he got no reply, then the fish leaped over and pulled the screen out of Megamind’s hands. “This has gone on far too long!” 

Megamind blinked where the screen had been seconds before and slowly turned his face towards Minion. A brief pang of frustration hit him, but he couldn’t muster up the energy to act on it. He was so close at figuring this thing out, didn’t Minion see that?

“I’ve stayed quiet, Sir, but this is out of hand.” Minion pressed the screen to his chest and gritted his teeth. “I didn’t push about where you’d gotten that recording from,” here Minion shot their old tape recorder a vicious glare like it was the plague. Megamind assumed it was fitting, as the tape currently contained a recording of Metro Man growling like a fucking monster straight out of Megamind’s childhood nightmares. “And I even said nothing when you refused to work on anything other than the pod, but it’s  _ Halloween _ , Sir. We haven’t prepared  _ anything _ , at this rate we’ll have to pull out a robo-sheep or else -” 

“Halloween’s cancelled this year, Minion.” said Megamind flatly. Minion froze, his jaw falling open as he stared at him. 

“Pardon?” 

“I don’t have time, Minion,” Megamind shook his head and turned to Metro Man’s pod. It was glowing softly, taunting him with its secrets. Sure, robo-sheep would be fun, but the pod was more important. The closer Megamind came to it, the more convinced he became. 

The problem was that Wayne had been correct; unlocking the pod was one thing, decoding an alien language was another. Megamind was so close and yet so far away. The pod, in all its gold and glowing metal was just like the black hole that had torn their home worlds apart. It contained all this knowledge, and it was continuously outside of his reach. 

Were Megamind less of a scientist he would have destroyed the pod out of frustration. It would feel good, getting some kind of control in an uncontrollable situation. He felt like he was back in naughty corner, except now it wasn’t Metro Man that held him there, it was the massive, consuming black hole locking him into place, making him too slow and heavy to get away. 

“Sir — it’s Halloween.” said Minion, confused. “We always do Halloween.” 

“We’ll do a big one next year,” Megamind promised, distracted. The pod was slowly losing its light, which meant it was time to play the recording again. 

“It’s only ten-thirty, Sir, I’m sure Miss Ritchi is still up.” 

Megamind snorted. Sure, Miss Ritchi might be up, but Mr Goody-two-shoes was probably all tuckered in by now. 

“Let her enjoy the Halloween-party,” Megamind said and reached for the recorder. She deserves some time off, doing normal things. The Game wasn’t exactly  _ normal _ . 

For a brief second he wondered if Miss Ritchi hated all the interruptions in her normal life. He hadn’t really thought about it, but it seemed… likely? Although, last Evil plot had released her from a charity-event when she was being grilled by Lady Scott about when she was going to make an honest man out of Metro Man, and Megamind had thought she looked pretty relieved when he burst in through the ceiling with a rock-entourage. 

“But, Sir -” Megamind raised a hand, gesturing that he was done with this conversation. He pressed the recorder and let that horrible growl burst through the speakers. He tensed, feeling his entire body shudder involuntarily at the sound. 

Each time he played it, the same thing. He kept seeing Metro Man growl like that at  _ him _ whenever he closed his eyes. Flying towards him with murder in his eyes. Megamind wasn’t sleeping much. 

It didn’t matter. Metro Man’s pod was glowing again, accepting him into the mainframe. He just needed time to translate all the information. That was all. He was certain of it. That pod… it was a chance to regain something — anything — of what they had lost. Even if it was just a sliver; even if it was more likely to concern Wayne’s people and perhaps just have a brief mention of Megamind’s… that sliver was enough. It would be worth missing Halloween, worth all the sleepless nights, and even worth listening to Wayne’s growl over and over again and wanting nothing more than to hide… that sliver was worth more than Megamind’s entire criminal empire. He’d suffer through a thousand years before he gave up on it. 

Megamind knew grief. He had felt it his entire life. He knew what it meant, being handed a bad hand. He had lost his planet, his parents, his culture. He had lost uncles to misfortune, poverty, deceases and addiction. He knew pain. He wanted something else. Metro Man’s pod held that. 

Minion would understand later. 

* * *

It was closer to midnight when Roxanne accepted the fact that the Halloween plan wasn’t happening. She had been waiting for Megamind to reveal his hand the entire week, but nothing happened. It was so unlike Megamind that she was growing paranoid. 

Megamind had held Halloween plots for the last seven years, like clock-work. He had  _ never _ missed kidnapping her and showing off a grand, themed ploy that eventually ended up with him in jail. It wasn’t right. 

And not to mention all the snide remarks she could already hear from the network, saying that maybe Megamind had found someone else to kidnap. 

Roxanne wasn’t jealous, but she needed to do something. Her professional career relied on it. She wasn’t going to give up her apartment, her pay-checks and her doorman just because Megamind wasn’t doing his part. If he wouldn’t come to her, she’d come to him. 

And the concern K had raised about the dock wouldn’t leave Roxanne alone. She had seemed genuinely concerned about it, and something that upset K like that was bound to be real, Wayne’s reassurances be damned. She knew that whatever was going on at the docks had to be big if Megamind skipped Halloween — he  _ loved _ Halloween — and she was going to find out what he was up to in that warehouse. 

And that was how Roxanne found herself sneaking around in the dock-area, in the early morning of her squandered Halloween plans, in freezing temperatures, with only her camera for security. She had briefly considered calling Hal, but had opted out of it. She’d get more done alone. 

But Roxanne was a professional, too, so she had sent a text to Carl telling him what she was up to. She thought about texting Wayne, too, but in case something were to happen she could just call out to him and he’d hear her, so she decided not to. Wayne was acting weird, too. She still couldn’t believe he had figured out the pod-thing and not told her. She didn’t have to tell him things, either. If he was going to be all secretive she could afford a few hours without Metro City’s favourite superhero knowing what she was up to. 

Finding the place was easy. Roxanne took one turn, but eventually managed to follow the instructions K had given. The warehouse in itself wasn’t anything to note — it was an industrious-looking building with a few entrances big enough to let trucks drive through it. The windows were blocked out with black spray-paint, keeping peering eyes out from whatever business Megamind was up to. 

Besides K’s assurances, and the fact that all entrances were guarded by five men each, every one looking buffer and burlier than the next guy, the warehouse could have been like any other in the area. 

Megamind ought to get himself better guards, Roxanne thought as she snapped a few pictures of the men. The brain-bots were more alert than these guys — although, she had to admit that their harsh faces were a little scarier than the brain-bots jagged maws had ever been. 

Roxanne did her best to stay out of sight from the guards and took a sweep around the property. In an alley to the side she found a rusty ladder attached to the wall. An old fire-escape, she guessed. It didn’t look safe. 

Good thing she was all caught up on her tetanus vaccines. Roxanne secured her camera over her shoulder and started to climb. 

Once on the roof, Roxanne found the door leading into the warehouse. Up there, the windows weren’t as well-kept as downstairs, and through a broken windowpane she could reach the hatch on the other side of the door and unlock it. 

Roxanne grinned as she slipped inside. Megamind was slipping if he thought this was secure. 

She worked her way down the stairs in total darkness, moving as carefully and silently as she could. She could hear people the closer she came to the bottom, and when she finally ended up on the ground floor she slowly creaked the door open.

A beam of light made her blink a few times, but once her eyes adjusted she peeked out, trying to catch sight of whatever was going on. No one appeared to have heard or seen her. Outside there was a big space and while she didn’t see any people she could see lots of boxes. 

‘Guns,’ K had said with a shudder. Roxanne slowly pushed the door open, peeked around, and slipped off to another hide out. She snapped a few pictures of the crates, then sneaked up to one. She opened the lid. 

Semi-automatic rifles. Roxanne made sure to photograph them and did a quick count of the amount of boxes in the room. She didn’t know much about weaponry, but this looked like it was supposed to supply an entire army. 

What would Megamind do with guns? Wasn’t that too… ordinary for him? Megamind built death-rays, not things humans were already using to hurt each other. 

“I’m telling you, the shipment will be ready.” 

The voice was far too close. Roxanne slammed the box shut and ducked down. She couldn’t see anyone, but the woman she’d heard had to have been just around the corner. She looked around, saw a door and took her chance. She rushed through and closed the door behind her. 

Roxanne found herself in an office which thankfully was empty. The only light was a dimmed desk light further in. Slowly she stepped away from the door and looked around. Perhaps there would be some clue around here as to what Megamind was up to. 

She walked over to the desk, leafed through the papers stacked there. It didn’t make any sense to her, but she made sure to get pictures of it anyway. Roxanne pulled up the first drawer. Inside there was a file that looked promising. She picked it up and opened it. 

It was a bunch of black and white pictures. They were dark and a bit grainy, but Roxanne could clearly make out who were in the pictures. It was Megamind and Metro Man, at some street in Metro City at night. 

Metro Man was in his suit, but Megamind was not. If Roxanne didn’t know better, she’d say he was casually dressed. Obviously either of them had no idea that anyone had taken the pictures. It looked like they were arguing. Roxanne flipped through several ones, seeing Megamind wave his hand angrily in Metro Man’s face. 

Then she came to the picture that froze her. Instead of arguing, Metro Man pushed Megamind against the wall. The next picture confirmed what she already knew; they were kissing each other. 

Roxanne just stared at the picture. She could hear her blood pump loudly through her ears.

But — how? Why? Metro Man and Megamind? The next couple of pictures were close-ups of the two of them, making out as if their life depended on it. Roxanne watched through the rest of the photos frozen in fascinated guilt. It ended with Metro Man pulling away from Megamind and Megamind clutching his suit, then the two of them walked away together. 

Roxanne — this wasn’t for her eyes. She shouldn’t have seen this, she was sure of it. Megamind would be horrified if he knew she had seen… that. 

She leafed through the pictures again, trying to get a clue as to who had taken them and why they were here in Megamind’s warehouse. Was someone trying to blackmail him? 

She stopped at the one where they pulled apart again. Metro Man was at a bad angle to read, but Megamind, clutching Metro Man’s suit… his face looked so open in that picture. Vulnerable. Roxanne knew that it was something he’d  _ never _ want anyone to see. 

It took her a moment before she realized she was angry. Angry at whoever had dared take these pictures at a time that obviously was very personal. She didn’t know what was the history and reason behind their kiss, but it was damn sure it was something between Metro Man and Megamind — not whoever forced their way into it. 

Roxanne hoped someone was trying to blackmail Megamind; she’d love to see what he did to the person that tried to expose him like this. 

“Who are you?” someone exclaimed from the door. Roxanne’s head snapped up from the pictures to see Hot Flash and Psycho Delic stand in the doorway. “Hey, I know you, you’re that reporter!” 

Roxanne knew when it was time to swallow her pride. 

“Metro Man!” she shouted at the top of her lungs. For a second, Hot Flash and Psycho Delic were frozen. Roxanne waited on Wayne to bust in through the ceiling. 

And… nothing happened. 

“Aw, looks like Daddy’s not coming to play,” said Psycho Delic. The last thing Roxanne saw was the purple cloud shooting straight for her. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Things have been a little slow for me and the energy to work have been pretty low, but I just want to thank everyone who have left comments on this! It really motivated me to read your kind messages and I hope you enjoy this chapter!


	10. "What do you mean Metro Man is in Australia?"

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Roxanne finds herself in the hands of the Doom Syndicate and they hatch a scheme to use her to get rid of Megamind for good.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A shorter chapter, but I hope you enjoy!

Roxanne woke up slowly. Her head hurt like a son-of-a-bitch and her mouth tasted funny. It wasn’t at all like the forget-me-spray and for a moment she was disoriented, then, along with a painful cough, the memory came back to her. 

Psycho Delic and Hot Flash. She coughed and the more she did the worse it felt. Her airways contracted painfully. 

‘I’m gonna suffocate,’ Roxanne thought in a panic when all of a sudden a purple cloud wrapped around her and allowed her to breathe again. As she raised her head she could see Psycho Delic as the one distributing the gas. 

With that notion, Roxanne’s sense of self came back. It was with some stress she realized she was tied to a chair by her wrists and ankles, and both hands and feet were numb. 

Megamind, at least, was an expert at knots; tying them just enough to be a nuisance, never actually painful. She could barely feel her hands at this point, so apparently his co-workers lacked the expertise Megamind possessed.

“Can’t have you dying just yet, the party’s just getting started,” Psycho Delic drawled. Roxanne glanced around and saw Lady Doppler sitting in a sofa, filing her nails while Hot Flash sat on the arm rest and watched her disinterested. 

“You guys are in so much trouble,” Roxanne croaked. Her throat hurt to speak. “When Metro Man -” 

“Metro Man’s off to Australia,” said Hot Flash. “It’s all over the news.” 

Roxanne blinked. 

“What?” 

“Fighting some big forest fire.” Psycho Delic leered at her. 

“Big papa’s not coming, luv,” said Hot Flash, grinning. The other’s laughed like it was all a big joke. Roxanne struggled against her bonds but it did nothing. They wouldn’t give. 

“Where’s Megamind?” she asked. The members of the Doom Syndicate glanced at each other. Lady Doppler was the one who spoke first.

“Oh, Darling, you’re uninformed,” she said with a shake of her head. Sparks like electricity shot up Roxanne’s spine at Lady Doppler’s movements. “No one’s seen that glass of water for weeks.

“Well, except for this,” she said and held up a picture of Megamind and Metro Man kissing. Roxanne’s stomach dropped. 

Megamind… wasn’t involved in this. It wasn’t his warehouse, nor his boxes of guns, or his file of incriminating pictures of himself and his sworn nemesis. That explained the guards at the door; not brain-bots but humans. It explained how K said the docks usually were safe, but whatever was going on here wasn’t following the rules. 

It had nothing to do with that damn alien pod, either. If Roxanne hadn’t been so fucking focused on it, she would have seen the signs! 

“People know I’m here,” Roxanne said and raised her chin. Well, Carl knew she was at the docks working on a story. She hadn’t counted on them not having Metro Man at their disposal to just  _ find _ her. 

How long did fighting a forest fire take, really? 

“And thanks to that we had to move shop,” said Psycho Delic with a sneer. He was glaring at her in a way that caused shivers to run along her back. 

Psycho Delic gave her the creeps, always had. When Roxanne was a teen Psycho’s name was being whispered like an urban legend, a vicious drug boss that teens at school found cool and the adults found terrifying. He was Metro City’s very own Pablo Escobar, except it was somehow made worse by the fact that he also could create hallucinogenics through his body and infect anyone he wanted. 

The only ones immune to Psycho Delic’s work was Metro Man. And Megamind and Minion, of course. 

“What’s the Doom Syndicate doing with all those guns?” Roxanne asked instead, slipping into her familiar role of investigator. The villains each gave her an unimpressed look. 

“What is this, twenty questions?” Psycho Delic snorted. He turned to his colleagues. “Let’s just get rid of her.” 

From the sofa Hot Flash’s hair started glowing brighter, and she raised a hand towards Roxanne, her hands being licked by pink flames. Roxanne started to struggle, fighting against her restraints.

“Wait,” said Lady Doppler. Roxanne pressed her eyes closed, waited to be set on fire, but the heat never came. “She’s  _ Roxanne Ritchi _ .” 

Roxanne opened her eyes slowly. Hot Flash was lowering her hand, glancing at Lady Doppler. “And?” 

Lady Doppler placed down her nail-file. “And, she’s had a front row seat for Metro Man and Megamind’s battles for what? Close to ten years?” 

“So?” Psycho Delic snapped. Lady Doppler’s grey eyes focused intently on her. She was smirking. 

“Ten years is a long time to survive without a scratch in a super-fight.” she practically purred. “And yet, here she is, with her big eyes and petite little mouth.” 

Psycho Delic glanced at her. Roxanne’s skin crawled at the attention. 

“You’re thinking Megamind’s sweet on her?” Lady Doppler shrugged casually. 

Roxanne felt her eyes widen. That was — completely wrong. Megamind needed an audience, she was a reporter, it made sense. And she’d like to think she was reasonably clever. Megamind liked cleverness. She kept her mouth shut though, because whatever the Doom Syndicate thought, at least it might give her a better chance not to get toasted like a marshmallow by a fire mutant. 

“Then we should kill her just to send a message.” Psycho Delic concluded. Lady Doppler rolled her eyes. 

“Always so aggressive.” she said and shook her head. “Think bigger.” 

“What are you thinking?” said Hot Flash. Lady Doppler grinned at her. 

“Our dear Overlord must go to great lengths not to accidentally harm her.” she tilted her head thoughtfully at Roxanne. “What wouldn’t he give up for her safe return, you think?” 

They all looked to Roxanne, their eyes narrowed in thought. 

“Give up the docks?” said Hot Flash. 

“Back off on restrictions?” said Psycho Delic. Lady Doppler’s face slipped up into a wide grin. 

“Leave Metro City for good?” she purred. 

“Megamind would never,” Roxanne found herself saying. She tried to give them her most intimidating look. “You’re over-estimating my importance. And what’s to say he wouldn’t just take those things back and come back to Metro City when you released me?” 

She wanted to curse herself! What was she up to? Trying to convince them that she wasn’t a useful pawn they could use against Megamind? That could get her killed!

“Megamind always keeps a deal.” said Psycho Delic slowly. 

“Only one way to find out,” said Lady Doppler. 

* * *

“Uh, Sir?” Minion poked his head past the curtain. Megamind shook himself awake, expectantly looking at the pod, but still nothing! Didn’t Minion know better than to disturb him? 

“Yes?” He reached for the recorder to activate the sound again. 

“The Doom Syndicate is requesting you,” said Minion. Megamind stopped, his hand hovering over the recorder. He glanced back to Minion with furrowed eyebrows. 

“Say what?” 

Minion pushed the curtain open to show Psycho Delic on all the monitors. The lair wasn’t being broadcasted to them, however, which Megamind decided was a small mercy. He wasn’t in the mood for Doom Syndicate if he was being honest. 

“Well, tell them to book an appointment, Minion!” Megamind said quickly, but he straightened out his pyjamas and tried to make himself somewhat presentable. You never knew. 

“They say it’s urgent.” said Minion. 

“Well, so is my evil time,” said Megamind and waved his hand. “See if we can’t schedule them next month; the sixth, or something.” 

“Alright, Sir,” said Minion doubtfully and turned back to the comms. He pressed a button which allowed them to talk. “Can we schedule an appointment?” 

Psycho Delic grinned, an unfortunate sight that caused his entire skeletal face to slip, revealing darkened teeth from all substance abuse. 

“He’s the boss,” said Delic, swirling around. “But I’m not sure his little flame’s gonna last that long.” 

Psycho Delic stepped aside and revealed a person behind him, tied to a chair. Megamind jumped up from his seat. 

“Roxanne?” She was gagged, but when she heard his voice she started to shout through the muffle. He couldn’t understand a word she said, but she looked… really frightened, he realized. He had never seen her like that before. 

“That’s right,” Delic said. The smirk was practically audible. “Meet us at fifth and thirteenth in an hour, to negotiate your abdication.” Psycho Delic popped back into frame. “Don’t even think coming armed; tootsie here have been injected with my poisonous venom, and she’ll die unless  _ I _ distribute the antidote.” 

“If you harm her -” Megamind started. Psycho Delic grinned. 

“Tick-tock,  _ Overlord. _ ” 

And then the feed ended. Megamind blinked at the monitors where Roxanne’s face had been moments before. 

“Track them,” he snapped to Minion. Minion immediately started typing away, but after a moment he shook his head. 

“They were using a burn-out, it’s impossible to track.” 

“Where is Metro Man?” Megamind growled. Wasn’t this Metro Man’s entire purpose? Keeping people out of harm's way? Roxanne Ritchi, Metro Man’s  _ girlfriend _ had just been poisoned. Minion tapped away on the keyboard. 

“Says here he’s off to Australia, trying to control the forest fire, Sir.” 

“What?” Megamind leaned over and read the brief article. Massive fire, firefighters’ working around the clock, yaddah-yaddah. “Out of all the moments he chooses to go on vacation, this is the one time?! Unbelievable!” 

“What shall we do, Sir?” Minion asked. Megamind glanced to the pod, hooked up his monitors. He whistled for the brain-bots to ready his suit. Looked like Halloween was back in business. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you so much for all your lovely comments and support! It makes me so happy that people are enjoying this! I know updates are a bit sporadic; alas, it is the life of a master-student. Writing for fun is a rare occurrence. Please leave a comment if you've managed to get this far; I love your feedback!


	11. Leave Metro City

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Megamind arrives to negotiate with the Doom Syndicate for Roxanne Ritchi's life.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> To all of you who left comments when I was taking a break, this chapter is for you!

Fifth and thirteenth was a dump. Despite that the numbers suggested a kind of centrality to Metro City it was in the outskirts of town, on one side a scrapyard and a big factory on the other. The factory spewed out smoke all hours of the day, and the scrapyard rusted away. Megamind hated it. It smelled wrong. It was industrialized, yes, but there was also another smell that he couldn’t put his finger on.

As teens, he and Minion had sold scraps they collected all over the city to the scrapyard, and even then it had made his skin crawl. Megamind tended to stay in the city centre, by the docks; what he considered his territory, and that generally meant he avoided the outskirts of town. It made sense that the Doom Syndicate felt comfortable there. Megamind had less sway there; cared less if they upheld restrictions in the fringes and was less likely to inspect their businesses. Megamind had never felt bad about the fact he had basically given the Doom Syndicate their own territory until this moment as he was walking in on someone else's turf, and they held the cards. 

How had they managed to catch Miss Ritchi?  _ Why  _ had they caught her? It was an outstanding feat, he had to admit. Catch Metro Man’s girlfriend the one time Metro Man is out of town. And then use her to have  _ Megamind _ abdicate? Well, their plan certainly had some kinks, but no one’s perfect. And the truth was that Megamind  _ wasn’t  _ going to let Miss Ritchi come to harm, so maybe their plan was better than he gave them credit for. 

Roxanne Ritchi was an essential part of the Game. If she got injured… he didn’t want to think about it. He didn’t want to think about how Metro Man, who was growing more and more… unpredictable… was going to react to Miss Ritchi injured either. 

Megamind was punctual. That part was out of respect as well was necessity. Being late to an evil plot was unprofessional, after all, even if the evil plot was against  _ you _ , and he also didn’t want to leave Miss Ritchi in the Doom Syndicate’s hands for longer than he had to. 

He stood still on the street for a moment, tasting the foul scent in the air. The street lights were illuminating small pockets of space and cast everything else in complete darkness, but Megamind could see just fine. He had always been able to see a blend of white light and infrared, and in the dark being able to see temperature shifts became incredibly useful. He already knew that Psycho Delic, Lady Doppler, and — based on the intense heat she radiated — Hot Flash was waiting with Miss Ritchi in the scrapyard. There was also a lot of guards, and he could tell they were heavily armed. He didn’t like the look of that. 

Megamind made his way over the fence, dropped down on the other side and started towards the group waiting for him. Crushed cars and other pieces of metal was stacked high above them, and at the end of a cleared up path the Doom Syndicate waited. The whole affair reminded him of a mafia-movie or something. 

“That’s close enough, Megamind,” Psycho Delic snapped when Megamind were about ten metres away from them. Megamind halted and raised his hands to prove he was unarmed. 

“Check him,” Hot Flash ordered one of their henchmen. The man walked over to Megamind and frisked him quickly. Megamind took his time looking over Miss Ritchi. She was tied to a rolling chair that had been pulled to the middle from a nearby office, still muffled. She didn’t appear harmed, but she had a high temperature, despite the cold night. He suspected it was the result of whatever Delic had forced down her system. Megamind gritted his teeth and gestured in the air when the henchman gave the clear. 

“So, what’s all this then?” he asked in a bored kind of tone. He generally didn’t come to the Doom Syndicate when they called, they had to come when it suited him. He hoped that through his tone they’d be able to tell he was displeased. 

“Where’s the fish?” Psycho Delic asked instead. Megamind glared at him. 

“Not here,” he replied. Psycho Delic snorted. 

“Bullshit — you don’t go anywhere without him.” 

“Well, perhaps you should have been more specific if you wanted Minion to come along, then,” Megamind snapped back. 

“Enough,” said Lady Doppler, and it was as much to Megamind as it was Psycho Delic. “Let’s negotiate.” 

Megamind raised an eyebrow at her. “Negotiate about what?”

“Your abdication as overlord of Metro City in return for Roxanne Ritchi’s life.” Lady Doppler said calmly. Megamind glanced to Miss Ritchi. Once again she tried to shout something, but the muffle made most of it unintelligible. Her big, blue eyes were wide however, and when they made eye contact she shook her head. Megamind looked back to Lady Doppler. 

“You realize she’s  _ Metro Mahn’s girlfriend,  _ right?” He made a dramatic look around the scrapyard. “He’s going to be so pissed at you when he finds out. Kidnapping is  _ illegal _ .” 

“Is she his girlfriend?” said Psycho Delic, his voice the quality of a cat that had swallowed a canary. Megamind gave him a don’t-be-stupid-look. Psycho Delic pulled something forth, a file tied together with string. He tossed it over to Megamind who caught it in mid-air. “Explain this then.” 

Megamind raised an eyebrow but untied the folder. Inside were black and white pictures, and Megamind recognized them immediately. They were of him and Metro Man, the night Wayne and he had decided to team up on the pod. The night Metro Man had… the night they kissed. Megamind flipped through the pictures, feeling a sense of dread grow in his stomach. Megamind took a pause by the picture where Wayne pressed him against the wall and kissed him. He could feel his cheeks flush and his heart racing. That anyone had seen this, let alone the  _ Doom Syndicate,  _ made him feel sick. It made him feel violated. 

Take away whatever weird thing Metro Man and he had going at the moment, if it came out that he had been kissing Metro Man of all people — that would ruin his reputation. Megamind had been raised in prison. There were masculine rules you didn’t break, lest you suffered massive loss to your cred. 

Homosexual behaviour was of course practised, but it was a disgrace to be the receiver in that practice. People would take one look at these pictures and there was no way they wouldn’t draw conclusions from that, from everything from the way Wayne had pushed him against the wall, to the way Megamind clung to his suit when he pulled away… these pictures could ruin him. 

And as Megamind stared at himself, clinging to Metro Man like his life depended on it, he also realized that these pictures took something away from him. The chance to decide for himself whatever it was that were going on between him and Metro Man and where that should lead, should it lead to anything at all. These pictures outed him into something he didn’t even understand. It certainly outed Metro Man as well. 

Megamind had sort of hoped that by waiting for answers by the pod — answers that might never come — he could get away from dealing with… this. And here it was again, delivered to him by the Doom Syndicate. He had managed to outmanoeuvre Wayne, but he couldn’t run from this. 

He took a deep breath, steadied his racing heart. No one could hear it, Metro Man wasn’t here. He had this under control. He looked back up at Psycho Delic and tried to keep his face calm. 

“Explain what?” he asked. “Bad photoshop?” 

“So they’re fake?” asked Hot Flash. Megamind shrugged and closed the file with a snap. 

“Obviously,” he said. 

“We have the negatives,” said Psycho Delic. Megamind raised an eyebrow. 

“If you say so,” he said, mustering up every ounce he had to make himself sound uncaring. He sighed. 

“Look, I really don’t have time for this, so unless we’re going to fight, I’d really just rather get this done with.” He waved his hand again. “You come with a threat, I come with a counter-threat, eventually we come to the conclusion that I am Metro City’s overlord, and things go back to usual.”

“Not this time,” said Lady Doppler calmly. “This time, we’re winning.” 

She nodded to Delic, and suddenly a purple cloud shot towards Miss Ritchi from Delic’s body. Miss Ritchi started to cough and through the muffle Megamind could see she was struggling for air. She was going to suffocate if he didn’t do anything. 

“Alright, stop!” He shouted. The cloud drew away, but Megamind could see it pool behind Delic like some looming threat. 

“So you do care,” said Lady Doppler with a sarcastic smile. Megamind shot her a dirty look. 

“I care about my empire not being levelled to the ground when Metro Mahn arrives back from his little vay-cay and finds his girlfriend dead.” he said. For a second he almost believed himself. He could see Wayne go berserk. Probably. Maybe. He straightened up. “Or have you forgotten about Metro Mahn? The super guy, Mr Goody-two-shoes who possesses invulnerability, super-strength and can fly?” 

“We’ll deal with Metro Man ourselves,” said Lady Doppler. “Once you’re out of the way.” 

Megamind couldn’t help it. He started laughing. 

“You’ll deal with Metro Mahn?” he said. “You have no idea how to deal with Metro Mahn. You need me, and the worst part is, you’re all too stupid to even realize it.” 

That seemed to get their attention at least. The Doom Syndicate members glared at him, and Megamind shook his head. 

“You think business run as smoothly as it does here in other cities with super-people?” Megamind snorted. “New York — or what about fucking Metropolis? 

“I’m the fucking distraction,” Megamind said in a venomous tone. “I keep Metro Man focused on me so you have the fucking chance to conduct business in the first place!” 

He could see the members glance between themselves. He took a chance to glance at Miss Ritchi. She stared at him like she didn’t recognize him. Megamind looked back to see Psycho Delic staring at him. The drug lord started laughing, a dark, creepy laugh that sent shivers down the spines of lesser people. Not Megamind, though. 

“Good try,” Psycho Delic said and pointed at him. “I almost believed you. But you’ve always been expressive in the eyes, and looking at tootsie, here… you don’t want her to come to harm.” 

Delic took the few steps that separated him from Roxanne and grabbed hold of her hair. Roxanne struggled to get away from him, but he gripped her hair so tight it had to hurt like hell. She made a sound and Megamind reacted. 

“Leave her alone!” Psycho Delic smirked but didn’t let go of her. Lady Doppler was the one who started talking. 

“We’ll let her go when you leave Metro City. For good.” 

Megamind looked between her and Psycho Delic. He didn’t have to look at Roxanne in order to feel her gaze on him. 

Leave Metro City, the one place that had been his home since exile, even though it was a shitty place? Even if the city never had appreciated him? Leave the game; the one thing he was good at? 

He could refuse. He should refuse. But he didn’t know what concoction Delic had put in Roxanne, and even though Minion was at the Evil Lair trying to use old samples of Delic’s drugs to make an antidote that would hopefully be successful, it wasn’t certain it would work. He hadn’t even received the code that Minion had  _ anything _ at all. 

Megamind allowed himself to look at Roxanne properly. Her big, blue eyes, the flush of her cheeks, the way her brown hair fell like silken tresses around her face — when it wasn’t being held by a psychopath, that is. 

Megamind felt like Metro Man had hit him in the gut with all his strength as he watched her. He’d give up anything for her, he realized. He’d even give up being a Bad Guy for her. 

He looked to Lady Doppler again.

“Fine,” he said, his voice tight. “I’ll leave Metrocity.” 

“For good,” said Lady Doppler. Megamind gritted his teeth. 

“For good,” he copied and held up a hand to stop them from interrupting. “In exchange that Roxanne Ritchi is released and given the antidote to save her life -” here he glared at Psycho Delic, “- as well as the Doom Syndicate’s word that she will be safe and unharmed for the rest of her life.” 

“She’s snoopy, what she gets up to is none of our business,” said Hot Flash. Megamind shoot her a look. 

“That’s the deal — I leave Metrocity, and she is never harmed or involved in any of your schemes.” 

Megamind kept his eyes on the members of the Doom Syndicate, fearing that it he looked to Roxanne he’d say something that would be dangerous. He could see them shoot each other looks, then they nodded. 

“Deal,” said Lady Doppler. Megamind pointed to Psycho Delic. 

“I want to hear him say it.” 

Delic rolled his eyes, his fingers still clutching Roxanne’s hair. The drug lord shrugged. “Fine, deal.” 

Megamind nodded. The air felt tense around him. The bad smell was everywhere. 

“Give her the antidote,” said Megamind. Delic gripped her hair tighter again. 

“Not before you get the hell out of our city.” he said. Delic nodded to the edge of the scrapyard. “The city-line ends there. Start walking, and keep going till you’re long gone.” 

Megamind glanced the direction Delic nodded towards. A fence separated the scrapyard from everything else, and then nothing. Fields that probably led to a suburbia somewhere, and then the world. 

It struck him that he didn’t know what lied beyond. Megamind had never left Metro City. From the moment he had crash-landed there by chance he had stayed there. Inside an invisible line. Leaving hadn’t even occurred to him. 

He swallowed, the stench of the place almost choking him, and slowly Megamind started towards the edge. He reached the fence, grabbed the metal, then, heard a commotion behind him. He twisted around just in time to see Roxanne yank herself out of Psycho Delic’s grasp, somehow having freed herself from the confines of her chair. She yanked the muffle out of her mouth. 

“Megamind, no!” He saw her dash towards a guard and wrestle the rifle from him, and then there were gun-shots. Megamind turned and ran as fast as he could towards Roxanne. Time actually seemed a little slower as he did. He saw Roxanne fire a round wildly, but it did the trick. He managed to reached her, grabbed a hold of her arm and started dragging her along. Roxanne shot a few rounds back and Megamind pulled her into a side corridor of scraps to escape retaliation.

“Are you crazy?” he shouted at her. 

“I’ve always wanted to do that!” Roxanne screamed back at him. The drugs must have made her delirious. Megamind continued to drag her along and raised his hand to his face. 

“Minion, code, send in the brain-bots!” There was static for a moment, and Megamind feared Minion wouldn’t reply, but then he heard his friend on the other side. 

“You know, the whole point of a code is -” 

“Minion!” Megamind screamed. Gunshot ran out behind them and Megamind tossed both himself and Roxanne to the ground. “Now!” 

He couldn’t hear it because of the gunshots, but suddenly a smoke-bomb dropped by next to them, hiding them from view. One brain-bot appeared next to them and made a curious bowg. Megamind took the hint. He scrambled back up, pulled Roxanne with him and ran the way the brain-bot directed him. 

In a few turns they ended up by the hover-bike and Megamind could have kissed Minion for that stroke of genius. 

“Get on!” he screamed. They both jumped up and the bike revved to life. Quickly Megamind flew off. A bunch of brain-bots joined them after causing mischief back at the scrapyard and escorted them back to the Evil Lair. 

The landing was smooth and Minion rushed over to meet them. Megamind stepped off the bike and took a shuddering breath. Behind him he could feel Roxanne also step off. 

“That was awesome,” she exclaimed. “We went all gangsta’ on them!” Megamind twirled around and glared at her. 

“What the hell was that?!” he snapped. Roxanne blinked those beautiful blue eyes at him. Her smile vanished but the flush didn’t disappear from her cheeks. “You nearly got yourself killed!” 

“I stopped you from making a mistake!” she said. She sounded hurt — at him, for questioning her. “Giving up Metro City to them —” 

“I was trying to save your life!” Megamind said. “You need Delic’s antidote, or have you forgotten that?” 

Roxanne paused. For a second it seemed like she actually had forgotten that, as if defending Megamind’s title of Overlord of Metro City was more important than her life. Then she shook her head. 

“I’ll take my chances, but Megamind, surrendering to the Doom Syndicate, that is a mistake. It looked like they’re smuggling in weapons to do a coup and —” 

“They are,” Megamind snapped and shook his head. “Against  _ me _ .” 

Roxanne watched him, her face suddenly sceptical. 

“You don’t think that after they got you out of the way, they’d go amok on the city?” she said. Megamind made a frustrated sound. 

“Yes, they would, but when Metro Mahn returns he would have gotten it under control!” He shook his head again and gestured to her. “And you would have received the antidote and been safe!” 

“But you would have been gone!” said Roxanne. She glared at him, her face filled of righteous fury. “Delic said you always keep a deal, so I couldn’t let you go through with it.” 

Megamind watched her, then he looked to Minion. 

“Tell me you have an antidote ready.” 

“I have made some progress, sir,” said Minion apologetically and looked to Roxanne. “Perhaps if I could use a blood sample from Miss Ritchi I could more easily identify the pathogens and stabilize a cure.” 

“Sure,” said Roxanne and started rolling up her sleeve. Minion raised a finger. 

“Miss Ritchi, may I take the gun, first?” 

Roxanne stopped, blinked at the weapon and then sheepishly handed it over to Minion. Megamind growled and stalked off to get a syringe and some disinfectant. This was the weirdest Halloween ever. 

* * *

Usually when Roxanne was in the Evil Lair an Evil Plot was undergoing. Now, when the Evil Plot had been stopped, it seemed like Megamind didn’t know what to do with her there. He was the one to draw blood from her. 

“You’re pretty good at that,” Roxanne said, trying to make conversation. Megamind looked up at her, his green eyes unreadable. 

“Yeah, well, I can’t very well go to a hospital, can I?” he replied. At her confused expression he continued. “An alien goes to the hospital, says, ‘doc, I don’t feel so good’. The doctor says, ‘you think you got it bad, now I’ll have to do a fuckton of paperwork from Area 51’.”

Roxanne watched his face, stiff and determined. 

“That’s a bad joke,” she said slowly. Megamind smiled at that, but it didn’t reach his eyes — not like when he was talking about his next evil scheme, trying to impress her with the latest gadget. 

“People loved it in shool.” he said drily. “Used to shout it as they beat me up.” His voice was emotionless. “Perhaps you just lack humour.” 

Roxanne shut up after that, and Megamind handed the syringe over to Minion and carefully applied a band aid to her vein. Roxanne watched his elegant, blue fingers work, then as quickly as they had arrived they disappeared. She glanced at him again. 

“I’m sorry if I scared you,” she said. Megamind raised an eyebrow. 

“Scared me?” he copied. Roxanne nodded. 

“When I grabbed the gun and started shooting.” she said and rubbed the back of her neck. “That was… a bit reckless. I’m sorry.” 

Megamind blinked, trying to process what she had said, then he nodded. 

“Yes, it was,” he said. “You’re lucky the safe was off.” 

“Hey, I know how to use a weapon.” Roxanne said with a huff, offended. Megamind gave her a dubious look. 

“Oh, really?” he said and crooked his head. “How?” 

“I reported a scoop on a gun range,” Roxanne said. Megamind raised an eyebrow. 

“And there you learned how to shoot a semi-automatic rifle?” She looked back at him. If she didn’t know better, he almost seemed amused. Roxanne shrugged lightly. 

“Well, no — not entirely.” she admitted. “My uncle Ray was a prepper when I grew up.” 

“What’s a prepper?” Megamind asked, confused. Roxanne was surprised she had even said anything about it, because she tended to not talk much about that life. She shook her head.

“A survivalist — he believed the world was going to end, so he hoarded all kinds of stuff in a bunker.”

“Ah.” A glimmer of understanding emerged in Megamind’s eyes. “Aliens?” 

“Race war, actually,” said Roxanne. “And gay marriage, of course.” 

“Charming,” said Megamind. 

“We’re not in touch,” said Roxanne awkwardly. At the mention of gay marriage she was suddenly reminded of the pictures she had seen before. She knew it hadn’t been for her eyes, but she needed to say something about it. Maybe explain to Megamind that she had seen them, but she didn’t mean to, and that she was sorry for invading his privacy. 

“I — uh,” Roxanne arranged her hair nervously, a distraction to sooth herself. “I need to tell you something.” 

Megamind looked at her and waited. She hesitated, glancing into his big green eyes. “I saw the — uh — the pictures of — you and Metro Man.” 

His eyes widened and she held out her arms. “I didn’t mean to, it was an accident — well, I mean, I meant to look in that file, but I didn’t know what was in it!” 

She was rambling. Megamind gripped her arm tightly and it snapped her right out of it. 

“Don’t tell Minion,” he whispered, panic badly hidden in his voice, and then Minion returned from wherever he had been. 

“I’ve got it!” He said cheerfully and then stopped in his tracks. In his hands he held a tray with a syringe on, and a clear blue liquid was in it. “Is everything alright?” 

Megamind released her arm and dashed up. 

“Yes, everything is perfect, Minion,” he said and gestured to Roxanne. “Now hurry, Miss Ritchi needs the antidote, immediately!”

Minion watched them both suspiciously but came over to her. Roxanne winced at the look of the syringe. 

“Are you alright, miss?” asked Minion. Roxanne glanced up and gave him a faint smile. 

“Yeah, I just… don’t like shots.” she said. 

“You were fine when I drew your blood,” Megamind objected. Roxanne shrugged and shivered at the same time. 

“That’s different,” she said. “Taking something out is fine, it’s putting something  _ in  _ that I don’t like.” 

Minion gave her a kind and toothy smile. “I’ll be as gentle as I can, Miss.” 

For some reason that comforted her, and she nodded her agreement. 

Minion administered the shot, and it really wasn’t as bad as Roxanne had feared. 

“You ought to rest a bit,” said Minion when he was done. “The antidote needs some time, and you must be tired.” 

Roxanne looked around for a clock but couldn’t find one. “What time is it?” 

“Five o’clock, miss,” said Minion. Roxanne had left her apartment at midnight. For some reason that surprised her the most. “You can sleep in Sir’s bed, miss. I’ll go and change the sheets.” 

“No, I can’t,” said Roxanne and looked between the fish and Megamind. “Where will you sleep?”

Megamind’s cheeks flushed a soft shade of fuschia, and he avoided her eyes. 

“I’ll sleep on the couch,” he said. Roxanne was suddenly too tired to argue. Minion put a hand over her arm. 

“This way, miss,” he said and she stood up and followed. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Please leave a comment if you enjoyed, I read all of them and they are super-motivating! You people are the best, and I am so happy that people want to hear more about what I make up about a ten-year-old movie (I mean, Megamind is a masterpiece, so it makes sense, but that you want to read /my/ musings about it... harder to believe).


	12. Remembrance

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The day after escaping the Doom Syndicate, Roxanne can't leave least the Doom Syndicate is after revenge, and so have to stay in the Evil Lair.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Well my friends, I have no impulse control, so here's the next chapter. Hope you enjoy ~

It was several hours later when Roxanne woke, feeling worn but not feverish anymore. The antidote seemed to have done its job. She had gotten to borrow clothes to sleep in — pyjama trousers she barely managed to squeeze into and a t-shirt with the neck-part cut open to accustom for Megamind’s enlarged head. She felt a little weird thinking about Megamind dressed in normal clothing. Where were the spikes? The leather? The flair? 

Of course, it did say Edgelord on the t-shirt, so she supposed it had a little flair, but it was mild compared to his usual style. 

Roxanne laid in the bed for a moment. It was soft and the sheets smelled of a gently fragrant laundry detergent. Megamind had a big bed — much too big for just one person. Roxanne frowned and sat up. That wasn’t her business, was it? 

Tiredly she rubbed her face and rolled out of the bed. She made her way at random, but her instincts were correct and she quickly found a bathroom. She did her business and as she watched her hands she caught sight of what she assumed was Megamind’s toothbrush. That was inconspicuous, but what made her laugh was the Metro Man toothpaste next to it. Wayne’s face was smiling blindingly at her and in a speech bubble above his head it said ‘ _ Hey, it looks like my hair! _ ’. She wondered if it was Minion or Megamind who had bought that particular item. 

After her laugh she took toothpaste on her finger and rubbed it all over her teeth. The paste was sweet, like kids’ toothpaste, but it made her feel a little more refreshed at least. 

When she had completed her bathroom routine to the best of her abilities Roxanne stepped out into the Lair. It was silent and Roxanne tiptoed barefoot to where she had last seen Megamind. 

He was still there, and even though he had said he’d sleep on the couch it looked like he had fallen asleep in a chair. Next to Metro Man’s pod. 

Roxanne frowned and carefully wandered over. Wayne had said he’d sorted the pod — but it was here? In Megamind’s lair. 

She leaned close and inspected it. Megamind had removed what seemed to be the chassis and connected lots of wires to a larger computer. On screens a bunch of symbols were flicking back and forth. It looked like Megamind was running some kind of diagnostics on the spaceship. 

Standing next to the pod was an old tape-recorder with its speakers facing the pod. Roxanne peered closer, glanced to Megamind drooling in his sleep and pressed play. 

From the recorder, the ugliest growl she had ever heard burst forth. Several things happened at once. Next to her, Metro Man’s spaceship started to glow brightly. From the chair Megamind flinched awake with a gasp, then he fell off the chair. Roxanne blinked and ran over to him. Megamind was stiff as a board, and when she touched him to help him up he suddenly flinched from her and pulled away. 

“Are you okay?” Roxanne asked. Megamind shuttered, his eyes glued to the recorder. Slowly Megamind seemed to come back to his senses and pushed himself off from the floor. Roxanne kept her hands to herself but stood close enough to help him is he needed it. “What was that?” 

“Metro Man,” Megamind said through gritted teeth. Roxanne glanced to the recorder and frowned. 

“It sounded like an animal,” she said hesitantly. Megamind dusted himself off and glanced at her. 

“It’s the pod’s activation-sequence; to identify the driver.” 

“I thought Metro Man took the ship back,” Roxanne said. Megamind gave her an odd look. For a second neither of them spoke. Roxanne thought back on the pictures, and the kiss, and suddenly she felt stupid. 

There was obviously lots of things Wayne didn’t share with her.

“Listen, Megamind, about the pictures -” Megamind glared off into space and avoided looking at her. Roxanne sighed. “I understand that it is personal, and I don’t want to intrude on… whatever is going on. I just want you to know that I’m not going to tell anyone.” 

“Miss Ritchi, there is nothing  _ going on _ ,” Megamind said, his voice low and hard. Roxanne knew she should leave it, but she wanted to make sure he knew she was serious. That she wouldn’t spread anything forward to anyone, no matter that she was a reporter. She reached out touched his shoulder. 

“Okay. I’m just saying, I won’t say anything.” Megamind snorted and pulled away from her.

“That won’t matter, Roxanne,” Megamind snapped at her. His body was stiff, and he started to pace like a caged animal trying to release energy. Roxanne blinked. He had never called her Roxanne before. Megamind paced back and forth. “The Doom Syndicate will spread it all over the city in retaliation — I’ll be ruined.”

He picked up a wrench and glared at it. 

“Fucking Wayne.” he muttered. Roxanne didn’t know if she should be surprised to learn that Megamind knew Metro Man’s secret identity or not. She supposed that if they were an — item? — it made sense that he knew. 

The way he glared at the wrench however, as if he imagined it had the face of Metro Man on it and he was trying to light it on fire through telekinesis told Roxanne that maybe it wasn’t as simple as to just call them an item and call it a day. 

What had she gotten herself into with this? She had set out to investigate what Megamind was up to at the docks, and now her investigation had taken a completely different turn. She could tell Megamind was upset though, and she wanted to calm him somehow. 

“It’s not that bad,” she said gently. Megamind turned to glare at her. Roxanne felt a shiver run up her spine. She straightened up and gestured widely to the devices in the lair. “I mean, it’s just pictures — you’re Metro City’s reigning supervillain! People shudder when they hear your name; cower by your custom-boots!” 

For a moment it looked like she was winning. Megamind lowered the wrench, a spark of interest in his green eyes. 

“Leather from baby-seals,” he agreed. Roxanne nodded encouragingly. 

“You’re  _ the _ bad guy,” she said. “No one is going to forget that.” 

She could see Megamind’s face shift through several emotions in rapid succession. First, something alike hope, then doubt and something that looked like… grief. His face fell and he shook his head. 

“You don’t understand,” he said and made to start a rant, but then his eyes locked onto to something behind her and his eyes grew wide. 

“What?” Roxanne twisted around to look, but couldn’t see anything unusual. Metro Man’s spaceship was glowing gently, but besides that it all looked ordinary. Megamind, however ran past her to the computer. 

“It’s unlocked — I’m in!” He laughed excitedly and twirled around to face her. “The encryption, it’s broken!”

Roxanne didn’t know what he was talking about, but his enthusiasm was contagious, and she found herself rushing to look at the screen. To her, it looked like a computer that was set to a different language — kind of similar enough for her to understand, but more through interface and less to do with any symbols she could interpret. Megamind started pulling things forth and Roxanne leaned close. 

“Is that… an alien language?” she asked, her voice caught in her throat.

“Yes,” said Megamind. Roxanne looked over to him and grinned. 

“That is  _ so  _ cool!” she exclaimed. Megamind looked confused at her enthusiasm, but smiled brightly as well. Roxanne looked back at the screen. She was the first human ever to come across confirmed, alien language! “What does it say?” 

“Don’t know,” Megamind said brightly. “Complete gibberish to me — but I’m in!” 

He did a little dance, then started to pull up programs that Roxanne could understand. It seemed to be a translation-script of some kind. 

“Do you know what this means?” Megamind asked her. She looked at him. His green eyes sparkled excitedly; the Doom Syndicate was forgotten. It was like when an Evil Plot was underway and Megamind was sure he would win this time. She smiled and shook her head.

“We’re going to learn the last information Metro Man’s people could save from the black hole — what they wanted their only surviving son to know about them.” 

Megamind looked wistful, and somehow sad as well. Roxanne observed him and slowly looked back to the computer. 

“That’s amazing,” she said. 

Wayne rarely spoke about it, but once he had mentioned the black hole to her. It had been just in passing, something he didn’t like to dwell on, and she had been able to tell it made him uncomfortable. Just mentioned that the black hole destroyed his world, and that Megamind came from the planet next door. 

Two inhabited planets in the same solar system. What were the odds of that? What were the odds that the only three survivors ended up on the same planet — in the same city? 

Roxanne straightened up and pushed her hair out of her face. 

“I suppose I’ll leave you to it, then,” she said. 

“Huh?” Megamind looked at her. Roxanne blushed and gestured with her hands. 

“I should go home; be out of your hair -” but Megamind didn’t have hair. Roxanne blushed even harder. Megamind shook his head. 

“I don’t think that’s a good idea,” he said. “At least not before Metro Man returns to the city.” 

At her confused look he spoke again. “The Doom Syndicate will be looking for revenge, and it’s not hard to figure out your address — you’re listed.” 

“Right,” Roxanne said. She hadn’t thought about that. Did that mean Megamind suggested she should stay in the Lair until Metro Man returned? To be honest, she didn’t have anyone she could crash at if she couldn’t go home to her own apartment. Roxanne worked. A lot. Her mom didn’t live in Metro City any more, and the friends that didn’t leave for collage had sort of… drifted away. Roxanne had co-workers, and informants, and reporting on Metro Man and Megamind’s fights. 

She hadn’t even realized when her life became all about work. Roxanne should at least call Carl and let him know she was alright. But her phone was dead, and her charger was at home. 

“Do you have a charger?” Roxanne asked. Megamind blinked at her like he had no idea what she meant. Roxanne guessed Megamind didn’t have a cellphone. “For my phone? I need to call my boss.” 

“Oh.” said Megamind. He looked around at all the junk surrounding him. “Uh — how does it look like?” 

* * *

Megamind did not have a charger. His response to that was to build one. That did not look safe to Roxanne; especially when he shoved a bunch of wires into the socket of her phone and sparks started to fly around it. 

Megamind didn’t seem to mind, though. 

“More power, Minion!” he shouted and Minion, who had joined them once he heard they both were awake, flipped an extra few switches and the lights flickered. Roxanne glanced at the ceiling and prayed nothing would catch fire. 

“It’s alive!” Megamind shouted gleefully. Minion turned off the power. Megamind was cackling, then very calmly he pulled the cords out and handed Roxanne’s phone over to her. Roxanne’s now fully charged phone that only slightly smelled of burnt plastic. 

“Uh, thanks,” Roxanne said. 

“No problem,” Megamind said and leaned his elbows on the desk he’d worked by. He placed his chin in his hands and grinned at her. “Want me to make it so it never runs out of battery again? 

“I did it to Minion’s suit — it’s only mildly radioactive.” 

Roxanne glanced to Minion who gave her a bashful smile. 

“The dosage is non-lethal,” Minion said cheerfully. 

“Maybe later,” Roxanne said. “I’ll just call my boss, tell him everything’s fine.” 

She turned and walked back to the privacy of Megamind’s bedroom. Before she stepped out of sight she turned back and saw both Megamind and Minion hunched over the computer connected to Metro Man’s spaceship. 

Roxanne closed the door behind her and dialled Carl’s number. She sat down on the bed as she waited for him to pick up. 

“Roxanne?” Carl’s voice greeted her. “Are you alright?” 

“Yeah, hi, Carl.” Roxanne smiled. She could envision her boss, shoulders falling back in relief at the sound of her voice. It made her insides all warm thinking that he cared enough about her to sound so worried over the phone. “I’m okay — I ran into some trouble, but it worked out.” 

“I tried to reach you five times,” Carl said. Roxanne made a face. 

“Sorry, my battery ran out.” There was a silence, then she heard Carl shift some papers around. 

“So, did your investigative stunt lead to anything, at least?” Roxanne laughed at the sour tone and nodded. 

“Kinda, but I’m maybe going to need some time off from the office to work on it.” 

“Can you at least give me a hint?” asked Carl. Roxanne glanced to the door. 

“Doom Syndicate. Big Guns.” She hesitated for a second. “Potentially a power struggle in the criminal empire going on.” 

“Megamind-related?” asked Carl. He sounded interested, and she knew she’d get time off. Roxanne bit her lip. She wasn’t going to give Megamind away, but she also needed to pay the bills. 

“Maybe,” she admitted slowly. “I’ll let you know more later, okay?” 

“Alright, keep me posted.” Carl said. 

“Will do —” Roxanne was about to hang up, but then changed her mind in the last second. “Hey, Carl? Any news on Metro Man?” 

Or Megamind, she wanted to add, but kept that to herself. 

“Nothing other than he’s still trying to get control of that forest-fire. Why?” Roxanne relaxed a little. 

“Just curious,” she said. “I’ll talk to you later.” 

They hung up. So at least the Doom Syndicate hadn’t spread the pictures, yet. Not to official channels, at least. 

Roxanne clutched her phone in her hands and considered it. Megamind said that the pictures could ruin him. What did that mean, exactly? 

The way he had said it… there was a real concern that he had. Anything that troubled Megamind that  _ honestly _ had to be taken seriously, even if she didn’t quite understand it. Obviously Megamind acted and faked drama all the time, but she could tell this was something else entirely. 

‘ _ Don’t tell Minion, _ ’ he had said as his fingers dug into her arm. Don’t tell Minion what? About the pictures? Or about the kiss? 

Roxanne frowned. A thought suddenly appeared in her mind. Wayne hadn’t…  _ done _ something, had he? Megamind had not seemed particularly thrilled about Wayne, and with Wayne’s powers it’s not like anyone could stop him if he  _ wanted _ to do something. 

She shuddered. That was not a pleasant thought. It couldn’t be true, either. She  _ knew _ Wayne. And the image when they pulled apart but Megamind still clung to Wayne’s suit… it had been something there then. She had seen it in Megamind’s face. 

Roxanne groaned and fell backwards into the bed.

“Stop thinking about it,” she ordered herself. She had sworn Megamind some privacy. Thinking about who and when he was kissing was not privacy. What he did in this big bed of his was not her business. 

Roxanne suddenly felt mad at herself and forced herself up from the bed. She took a few deep breaths and stepped back out into the main lair. Megamind was still hunched over the spaceship, but Minion had pulled himself away and were rearranging the mess Megamind had created when he built her phone-charger. When Minion caught sight of her he stopped what he was doing and smiled at her. 

“Ah, Miss Ritchi, are you hungry? I could whip up some pancakes.” Roxanne smiled at him. 

“Only if it’s no trouble,” she said. Minion swirled around in his ball a few times in what she assumed was the fish shaking his head. 

“Not at all,” Minion said cheerfully. Roxanne glanced to the back of Megamind. He still wore the battle-suit he had showed up in the scrapyard with. 

Well, Roxanne had been hogging his bedroom. He probably had his closet there. She looked back to Minion. 

“Can I help?” Minion looked surprised but nodded, and Roxanne followed the henchman into the kitchen. 

* * *

Megamind had been forced away from working on the pod after Roxanne and Minion had cooked pancakes, and… it was actually kinda nice. They were eating by a make-shift dining-table, Megamind’s latest invention pushed to the side to make room for a tower of pancakes and a large bowl of whipped cream. 

Roxanne was laughing at something Megamind said, and Megamind was only barely remembering the pod, the Doom Syndicate, and the fact that Metro Man still wasn’t back from his vacation. Out of all the stupid times, he had to pick now? 

The antidote seemed to have worked wonders, however. Roxanne seemed healthy, and when Megamind had in secret scanned her everything appeared normal again. Of course, he needed to take a blood sample to be absolutely sure, but for now, he was satisfied she was alright. 

For a moment, Megamind wondered if this was what it was like for the good guys, eating good food and joking with each other. He barely had time to finish that thought before the computer hooked up to the pod started to beep. Loudly. 

Megamind looked over just in time to see the screen go all wonky — letters flying all over the screen in rapid succession. 

“What is that?” Minion asked and followed Megamind’s gaze. The pod was glowing brighter than it had before and then suddenly the light switched from golden white to blue. Megamind stood up hesitantly from the table and walked towards it. 

The pod was humming softly, and when Megamind came within scanning-range the blue light shot out from it and formed a hologram. It flickered, formless for a second, then it took the shape of Megamind. 

Except it wasn’t Megamind. The face was different, softer. The clothes were white. The hologram was of a woman from Megamind’s species. 

Megamind just stood and stared at her. The hologram stared into space, not taking in anything at all for a second, then all of a sudden it jumped into action. The hologram faced Megamind and smiled. Tears were forming in her eyes. 

“Tipt — I don’t have much time.” The hologram said. It wasn’t speaking English, but Megamind understood it anyway. “I’m so sorry I couldn’t be there for you. You are our last hope.” 

Here the hologram flickered. The woman in the hologram was smiling, but tears were flowing down her face now. “I just hope that you reached the designated planet and that you are safe, wherever you are. The ship contains all the knowledge of our people.”

Another flicker, and the hologram looked away, onto something that didn’t exist anymore. She looked back at Megamind and smiled. 

“Just remember that mommy loves you,” she said, then the recording stopped. The hologram flickered and repeated again. And again. 

Megamind was trembling. He reached out, but his fingers went straight through her face. The woman was nothing but a trick of the light. That woman was dead. 

“Remember that mommy loves you.” 

Mommy. Remember that mommy loves you. This woman… was Wayne’s mom? Wayne’s biological mom was like Megamind? 

He stared at the hologram again. Blue skin, larger than human head, and her eyes were the same colour as Wayne’s blueish grey eyes. 

_ Remember that mommy loves you. _

Megamind didn’t even realize he was crying until Roxanne and Minion came up to either side of him. 

“Megamind?” Roxanne said hesitantly. “What’s going on?” 

Megamind shook his head and burst out into sobs. He hid his face in his hands, then Minion was pulling him close and Megamind was sobbing into Minion’s fur-suit. 

More gently than what should be possible Minion used his robotic arms to stroke over his back and hummed low, soothing sounds against him. Megamind gripped Minion’s fur and clung to him till eventually Minion was the only thing keeping him standing.

“Let’s go to another room, Sir,” Minion said calmly. Megamind shook his head and pulled away. 

“No, I need to —” 

“ _ Sir _ ,” said Minion. His tone made it clear that Megamind didn’t have a choice in the matter. “Please.” 

Megamind glanced at the hologram, watched it repeat and nodded. Minion ushered him towards his bedroom and pushed Megamind to sit on the bed, then he gently squeezed his shoulder. 

“I’ll be right back, Sir.” Minion closed the door behind him, but Megamind could still hear Roxanne and he whisper at the other side. 

“What’s going on?” Roxanne asked. 

“Please look after him for a bit, Miss,” Minion whispered back. “I’ll try and turn that message off.” 

Megamind remained where Minion had left him, and when Roxanne came in and closed the door behind her he made his best not to look at her. Roxanne was silent for a moment, then she slowly walked over and sat down next to him. 

“I don’t quite know what’s going on, but obviously that was pretty upsetting.” she said. Megamind bit the inside of his cheek and said nothing. “Do you want to talk about it?” 

He glanced to her. She was still in his pyjamas, and her blue eyes looked wide and concerned. He really  _ didn’t _ want to talk about it. In truth, he didn’t even know much. All he really knew was that there was a hologram of a person who looked like him, claiming to be Wayne Scott’s biological mother. Speaking Megamind’s native language. 

“That was his mom.” he said. Roxanne tilted her head. 

“Whose mom?” 

“Wayne’s.” 

They both stared at each other. Roxanne looked shocked. Megamind imagined that he wore the same expression. 

He shook his head, trying to clear it. He needed to think.  _ Focus _ . 

What did he know? 

Metro Man and he came from the same solar system. Metro Man’s pod was a survival ark, while Megamind’s was a botched-together, desperate attempt to save him. Megamind had a biological fear-response connected to certain aggression markers of Metro Man’s behaviour. Metro man’s mother was of the same species as Megamind and spoke the same language Megamind remembered from his own world. Metro Man was going through a change which had left him starting to find certain aspects of Megamind’s physique — such as his scent — arousing. 

_ Remember that mommy loves you. _

Megamind thought back; back before school, before prison, before the vacuum of space, to the one place he never ventured if he could help it. He thought of his home planet. His parents. His mother that had his eyes. His father that had the same face-structure as Megamind did as an adult. 

Their homeworld was being ripped apart. The infrastructure was breaking down and massive earth-quakes and shock-waves were wrecking the walls and ceiling around them. There was his parents, but who else was there? 

Blue men and women in white suits, and children. Some were blue. Some were… hovering? 

_ Look away from your parents _ , Megamind thought.  _ Look away from your mother. _

He did. Above his mother’s shoulder he could see a man and two children, huddled close. One blue baby cradled in his arms while another, slightly older boy was hovering next to his head. The flying boy was human-looking. Or rather, it was looking like Metro Man. 

Megamind reached out and grasped that memory — focused all his attention on it. 

A few days earlier he had been outside. His parents had ventured outside the safe-zone to meet someone. To show Megamind off to someone. 

Megamind tugged against the black hole threatening to suck him in, and from the purple sky a figure floated down. Metro Man. 

Except it wasn’t Metro Man. It was someone else. Older. His hair was completely silver. Megamind’s parents were talking to this man, and the man leaned over to Megamind and stroked his cheek. The man was smiling. 

He had supplies with him; scraps of metal that he gave Megamind’s parents. The very same scraps they used to build Megamind’s desperate escape-pod with. 

The silver man leaned his forehead against Megamind’s father’s, then his mother’s, and then, very gently, he rested his forehead against Megamind’s too. 

“ _ Goodbye, _ ” he said. Megamind shook himself from the memory. 

Roxanne was staring at him. 

“Are you okay?” she asked. 

Megamind let out a shaky breath. He didn’t know how he knew that, but he had just remembered the only memory he had of his second father. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I tried to find out of there was any fandom names for Wayne's birthname, but couldn't find any. So when in doubt, make something up! I settled on Tipt, which is a rearrangement of Metro Man's voice actor's last name, (Brad) Pitt. Kind of wanted it to be short since fandom big-names for Megamind is Syx and different variants of Sir. Thoughts, anyone?


	13. Dynasty

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Metro Man and Megamind tries to come to terms with the new information they've unlocked through Metro Man's spaceship. Knowing that both of them are very stubborn, Roxanne Ritchi wants to facilitate between them.

Wayne was tired. Like, legit, physically tired. He didn’t even know that was a thing that could happen, but apparently trying to put out a raging wild-fire threatening to burn down at least half of Australia's wildlife for 48 hours straight was enough to even tire Metro Man out. 

Things were finally —  _ finally — _ starting to get under control; at least enough that Metro Man could hand the reins of the volunteering fire-fighters and take five minutes to drink a coffee. 

He felt guilty as he stepped into the small barrack for fire-fighters arranged close by and poured him a cup. He should be out there, helping. Not just people, but animals too. He felt awful. He wanted to hide on the toilet and cry. 

Scotts’ don’t whine, his mother and father would have reminded him. Wayne grimaced and drank the bitter coffee in three gulps. He could do this. 

“Uh, excuse me, Mr Metro Man?” Wayne turned to the firefighter in question, the chief in charge, an older woman with the same, tired expression on her face as he felt in his bones. She looked him over like she was assessing him, then she held out a note. “Your girlfriend have been calling you.” 

“My girlfriend?” Metro Man asked and took the note. Hastily written down were the name Roxanne Ritchi, as well as her phone number. 

“She said it was urgent.” said the firefighter. “Sorry you didn’t hear sooner, but we couldn’t get a hold of you.” 

Wayne had been at the front, often times flying through the flames. Technology couldn’t handle the heat. He guessed the Australians weren’t used to the fact that they basically just had to shout his name for him to hear them. He gave her a tired nod. 

“It’s alright,” he said. “Is there a phone I could use?” 

“You can take my office.” She pointed at what basically was a cupboard, but it was private and he could close the door behind him, so he wasn’t complaining. Wayne barely fitted in there, but he manoeuvred himself behind the little desk and picked up and dialled Roxanne’s number. 

She answered by the fourth signal. 

“Wayne. When are you coming back?” 

Wayne frowned. He glanced at the phone. 

“Hi, Roxie. Uh, things are starting to get under control here, but…” 

“You need to come home.” Roxanne said. She sounded worried. “It’s Megamind.” 

Wayne straightened up in his seat. His first thought was that Megamind was hurt somehow, not ‘what was he doing now?’, but ‘is he alright?’. He pushed that aside. Megamind was alright. Megamind was probably just running rampant in the streets without him, having the time of his life. 

“What have he done?” Wayne asked and pinched the bridge of his nose. 

“Hey!” another voice protested. “He hasn’t done anything.”

“ _ Minion _ ?” Wayne blinked. 

“Yeah, sorry, Minion’s here too.” Roxanne said sheepishly. “I should have said.” 

“Why is Minion with you?” 

That didn’t make sense. Except if Megamind had kidnapped Roxanne, not knowing that Wayne was away from Metro City, and now had got Roxanne and Minion to call and convince him to come home. Except that that didn’t make sense either. 

“It’s a long story, I’ll explain when you get here.” Roxanne said and there was a silence on the phone. “I really think you should hurry.” 

She was starting to scare him. “Is everything alright?”

Through the receiver he could hear whispering between Roxanne and Minion. Had he been there he could have picked up what they said immediately, but the phone didn’t carry their voices particularly well. 

“Tell him -” said Minion.

“I don’t think — not right — Megamind should explain…” said Roxanne. 

“Sir have broken the encryption of your pod,” Minion said loudly into the phone. Wayne’s ears perked up. 

“Really? Has he found something?” 

“Uh, kinda.” Roxanne said. She sounded hesitant. “Just come home, Wayne. We have to go.”

She hung up on him. Wayne stared at the phone, then slowly lowered the receiver to the hook. Worry was starting to gnaw in his stomach. Had Megamind discovered something bad? Was Megamind doing something bad? He shook his head. No, Minion had said he wasn’t doing anything, and Roxanne would have been upfront with him if Megamind was up to something. That actually worried him even more, because that meant that it was something out of the ordinary; something that couldn’t be explained as easily. 

He stood up and went out of the office, looking for the chief. He found her arranging the rested firefighters to position over a map. 

“Chief — that was — apparently I am needed in Metro City.” he said and rubbed his neck. Oh, god. Why did he even say anything? It didn’t matter, because he was needed here. Megamind, Roxanne and whatever was going on just had to wait. 

But the chief turned to look at him, and she didn’t appear ready to tear him a verbal new one. Instead, she nodded and smiled tiredly. 

“Your help have been invaluable,” she said and held out her hand. “Thanks to you, we can take it from here.” 

Wayne blinked at her outstretched hand and was not tearing up. He cleared his throat and shook her hand quickly. 

“It’s been an honour, ma’am.” 

“The honour’s been ours, Metro Man.”

Wayne awkwardly nodded to her, and the other firefighters, and flew off. 

* * *

Wayne could fly fast, but travelling 15 000 kilometres took a while, even for him. Still, he was faster than the speed a rocket needed to leave Earth’s orbit, so he cut himself some slack.

Roxanne hadn’t said where to meet her, but once he caught sight of Metro City he tried to locate her. At first nothing came up. That nothing in itself was telling, though. That meant that she was somewhere where Metro Man couldn’t use his powers to smell or hear her — which pretty much only left Megamind’s lairs as options. His lairs, scattered around the city, were the only things that stood out like negative space for Wayne; completely soundproof and scent-free. And even though he needed to focus to  _ see _ those spaces, it was a lot easier to just search the negative spaces rather than the entire city. 

He quickly found both Roxanne, Minion and Megamind in the lair by the docks, the lair Metro Man knew was one of Megamind’s preferred spaces. He landed by one of the doors and knocked. 

He didn’t quite know what he expected to happen, but Roxanne popping her head out of the door was not it. She looked him over with a mixture of relief and worry. 

“Oh, good, you’re here.” she said calmly and held the door open for him. Wayne hesitated, then he stepped inside. 

“What is going on, Roxie?” 

Roxanne looked down the corridor and faced him. 

“Okay, remember what I said about something going on by the docks?” 

Wayne frowned. Barely. Roxanne had thought it had something to do with Megamind and Metro Man’s spaceship, right? 

“Yes,” he said slowly.

“Well, I went to investigate.” 

And Roxanne told him the whole thing, how she had been caught by the Doom Syndicate and how Megamind had come to barter for her life. She explained the Doom Syndicate’s plan to get Megamind to leave Metro City for good, and how she had stolen a semi-automatic rifle to stop Megamind from crossing the city line. 

Wayne just stared at her, trying to process it all. He had left the day before Halloween — how had they had time for all of this? 

Something else churned at his stomach, too. The thought of Megamind leaving the city left him feeling weird. Like, mad. Or…  _ jealous _ ? A mixture of all kinds of ugly emotions at least. He gritted his teeth. 

“What does this have to do with my pod?” Wayne asked perhaps a bit harsher than needed. Roxanne halted with her explanation and gave him a piercing look. 

“Well, nothing directly,” she said slowly. She glanced down the corridor again and sighed. “I think you need to hear it from Megamind.” 

Wayne frowned and followed Roxanne into the main-part of the lair. His ship was where he had last seen it, hooked up with a bunch of wires to Megamind’s machines. Megamind and Minion was there, and it looked like a set out of a sci-fi movie or something. From his pod a bright light were glowing, shooting out beams of light that became kind of like a computer screen hovering in the air in front of Megamind. Megamind was sifting through text and pictures so fast that Wayne had to slow time to even catch sight of what it was, not that it did much good because he didn’t understand what he saw. 

Minion was the first of the two to notice him. He tapped Megamind on the shoulder. 

“Sir, Metro Man’s here.” 

Megamind glanced at Wayne and several emotions Wayne couldn’t decipher flashed across his face before it hardened. With a flick of his wrist the light disappeared and the pod stopped glowing. Metro Man glanced between Megamind and the pod and rubbed his neck. 

“So, you cracked it then?”

Megamind said nothing for a second, then he looked past Wayne to Roxanne and back. 

“I did.” he said, his voice dark. 

Wayne shifted his weight from one foot to the other. 

Megamind was making him uncomfortable. He was using the same kind of voice he did during really bad fights, where both of them were sick and tired and were too brutal. 

“That’s amazing, Buddy,” he said. Megamind liked being praised, but Megamind’s expression remained grim. Wayne waited, but nothing came. “What does it say?” 

Megamind watched him, then sighed. 

He waved Wayne over and brought the light from the pod back up. With quick administrations he picked something forth, and all of a sudden a woman, blue, just like Megamind stood in front of them. 

Wayne couldn’t help but gasp. He looked to Megamind, excited. 

“A person like you!” he exclaimed. 

It hadn’t occurred to him at first, but one sleepless night as he had been mulling it all over in his head it had suddenly struck him that maybe one of the reasons Megamind were so interested in the pod was because it maybe contained information about his species too, as well as Wayne’s. 

If anyone  _ deserved  _ more info it was Megamind. He was a lot more deserving that Wayne, at least. Wayne felt guilty for thinking it, but did he really want to know what kind of life he could have had? He didn’t remember anything. Not like Megamind did. 

“A person like us,” said Megamind, tight-lipped. He shook his head and waved to the person. She burst into action and started talking, an alien language that sounded vaguely like something he had made up in a dream. The woman had her own distinct voice, but then one of the devices hooked up to the pod started talking English side by side with her. 

The device was translating, Wayne realized. 

She seemed to be on repeat, and she was crying by the end. 

“Just remember that mommy loves you.” the computerized voice finished. Megamind cut the sound quickly. Wayne could hear Megamind’s heart race next to him. Wayne looked at him. 

“I don’t understand — who is that?” 

Megamind pressed his lips together, his green eyes glued onto the woman, and then, slowly, he reached out and touched Wayne’s shoulder. Wayne felt like an electric current shoot through him. 

“That’s your mom, Wayne.” said Megamind gently. 

Wayne glanced back at the woman. If he had said it was Megamind’s mom, Wayne might have believed him. But when he looked back at Megamind Wayne knew he was telling the truth. He could see it in his eyes. 

“What?” he asked, confused. Megamind said nothing, just stared at the woman in front of them. 

“Maybe I should go and make us some tea.” said Minion suddenly. Wayne had practically forgotten he was there. 

“I’ll come with you,” said Roxanne and both Minion and Roxanne pulled back from them. 

“I don’t understand,” said Wayne. Megamind’s face cracked just a little, and he rubbed his face tiredly. It looked like he hadn’t been sleeping much, and when Wayne looked closer his eyes seemed bloodshot. “Have you been crying?” 

“Mind your business,” Megamind snapped, but lowered his hand and waved at the woman. “She’s your mom, Wayne. She recorded this message before she sent you off planet.” 

“But,” said Wayne. “She’s blue.” 

Megamind glared at him, then he slowly took a breath like he was talking to a child and needed to compose himself. 

“Wayne, we’re… we are the same species.” he said in that faked calm of his. Wayne frowned. 

“What?” 

Megamind gestured to the ship. 

“Okay, so, it’s actually a lot of information on this thing. I haven’t managed to go through or decode everything —  _ yet — _ but from what I’ve gathered so far is that life evolved on my -” Megamind snapped his mouth shut and exhaled loudly. “On  _ our _ planet, the blue one, not the one that you launched from, and — oh, why do I even care, you don’t remember shit!” 

Wayne blinked at him. Megamind swirled around and stalked off. 

“Megs!” Wayne called after him. Megamind flipped him off and ducked through a door. 

Wayne glanced back at the blue woman, then he followed him to what turned out to be the lair’s roof. Megamind was staring out over the bay, his face angled towards the abandoned observatory. 

Wayne floated up to him and stared that way too. He didn’t dare look at him, lest Megamind would get angrier, so instead he just watched the way the water made tiny waves against the concrete pier. 

“Your real name is Tipt, by the way.” Megamind said gruffly. “Of the Hajrka dynasty. The one chosen to leave our people any kind of legacy.” 

Wayne took his chances and looked at him. Megamind glanced over to him quickly, but the brief glance was enough. Wayne could read the pain and anguish in his eyes. He wanted to reach out to him, but knew that was a bad idea. 

Instead, he looked back over the water.

“I don’t understand how we can be the same species,” he said slowly. “You told me that we came from different planets.” 

Megamind sighed and bent down to pick up a forgotten screw from whatever scheme he had been hatching up on the roof last. 

“We  _ launched _ from different planets. It’s all recorded in the pod.” Here Megamind did a pause. “Or rather,  _ you _ are recorded, I’m pretty sure no one had any clue about me. Still the odd one out.

“Life in the glaupunkt-quadrant evolved on one planet, then spread to the neighbouring one. Considering that at least some of our population were — well, like  _ you _ — travelling to the nearest planet isn’t all that difficult.” 

Wayne rubbed his head. He might actually be getting a head-ache. 

“I just — I don’t understand.” he said and turned to face Megamind. Megamind observed him coldly. 

“ _ What _ don’t you understand, Wayne?” he asked. “Like always, fate have picked her favourite. You were chosen to survive when  _ everyone else  _ died.” 

Megamind looked to the sky and laughed, harshly and without any mirth. When he angled his face upwards he made his neck long, and Wayne watched the curve of his adam’s apple. Maybe he was trying to see out into space. 

“And you wouldn’t even have cared or found out about it if not I had, through some kind of sick cosmic joke, managed to survive through whatever shitfaced odds got stacked against me.” 

Wayne frowned. Was this why he was mad? Because… because Metro Man had been chosen to live? Wasn’t that a good thing? Wasn’t it his pod that even gave Megamind this knowledge in the first place? 

He should ask Megamind those questions. What came out of his mouth was something else entirely, however. 

“Yes, because everything is always against you, isn’t it?” he snapped. “You’re never responsible for your own actions; it’s not your fault when those actions have terrible consequences for other people!” 

Megamind shot him a dirty look. For a moment it looked like Megamind was going to attack him, but then his lips settled into a tight line. 

“Get the fuck off my roof, Metro Mahn.” 

Wayne glared at him. “Fine. “I’ll just take  _ my _ pod and leave.” 

“ _ Your _ pod? You know fucking shit-all about it!” Megamind exclaimed.

“It’s still mine,” snapped Wayne. 

“Yeah, well, stealers keepers,” snapped Megamind. 

“Girls, girls, you’re both pretty,” said Roxanne. 

Both of them spun around and saw her standing by the doorway. By the look of her face, she had been overhearing their argument, and she was not pleased. She shot Wayne a look that was not a look and pushed her chin out. 

“Tea’s ready.” she said calmly. She turned her attention on Megamind and there seemed to be some kind of silent communication between them, acted out entirely through eyebrow-flinches and mouth purses. Eventually Megamind huffed. 

“Fine!” he snapped and walked past Roxanne in. Roxanne looked to Wayne and raised an eyebrow at him. 

‘Well?’ it seemed to mock him. Wayne stood still for a moment, then followed Megamind down to tea. 

* * *

Roxanne could tell this was not going well. 

Wayne looked tired and confused, and Megamind looked like he was hiding his grief behind a huge wall of anger. They were at opposite sides of the cable, each clutching a cup of tea and refusing to look at the other. Minion glanced at Roxanne and placed down a fresh batch of muffins in the middle of the table. 

Roxanne knew that it was somehow up to her to mediate between them. 

“So,” she said calmly and sat down her own cup. “Let’s start with something easy.”

Megamind glanced at her and she smiled encouragingly. Based on his expression she could tell he didn’t consider any of this easy, but they needed to start somewhere. 

“Your solar system is part of the… glaupunkt-quadrant.” she said, pronouncing it slowly and as carefully as she could, hoping to somehow trigger Megamind into an explanatory rant. When nothing came except expectant stares from both Megamind and Wayne, Roxanne took a deep breath and kept her face as neutral as possible. 

She really wasn’t the best person for this, but Megamind and Wayne were both too stubborn to cooperate with each other. Roxanne felt stupid and nervous at the same time. 

Megamind had just spent half an hour in his own room after the pod released its message for the first time, then he had thrown himself into investigating what else the pod contained. Minion had complained, but it was like Megamind barely heard him. He had made a translation-program and read, and spent several hours just engulfed in that without saying a word. All she really knew was that, somehow, Megamind and Wayne were of the same species. Megamind had explained that much. 

The same species. Roxanne’s head was spinning at the fact. They looked nothing alike — Wayne was big and tall and just —  _ human _ . Megamind was short, like Roxanne’s height, and thin and wiry. And  _ blue _ . But they were the  _ same _ , just like Roxanne was the same as any human walking around in the surrounding bay area right now. 

Megamind was right. Nothing about this was easy. 

“My parents spent their last days alive trying to build my escape pod,” Megamind said suddenly. He was staring down in his tea, clutching both hands around the cup. “My mother designed it along with my fathers, using whatever scraps they could find. They — they genetically modified Minion so I would have some kind of guidance — so that I wouldn’t be alone.” 

Here Megamind looked up towards Minion. He took a deep, shaky breath. “I’m sorry, Minion. You were  _ created _ for — for me. To look after me.” 

“Sir,” Minion said and reached out and took his hand. “That doesn’t matter. I don’t care if I was born or made — I would have looked after you no matter what.” 

“It  _ does _ matter, Minion,” Megamind said, but he didn’t pull away.

“No, it doesn’t, Sir.” Minion said, calmly but determinedly. “I am more than what I was  _ made _ to be. I don’t care who made me, and neither should you.” 

Roxanne was watching them and feeling like she was intruding on something very private. She glanced to Wayne who, despite being cranky, also seemed uncomfortable. Megamind pulled away from Minion and stood up. 

“Come with me,” he said. Megamind walked to the pod again. 

Roxanne stayed at the table for a second and shared a look with Minion. The fish smiled gently and Roxanne felt hopeful. She stood up and followed with Megamind. Wayne and Minion came and stood next to him.

Megamind made that peculiar flick of his wrist and brought up several holograms; one was of the blue woman that was apparently Wayne’s mother. The other was another blue man, and the last was of a large, very  _ large _ , man with huge muscles. His skin was Caucasian flesh-toned. They were all dressed in white. 

“These are your biological parents, Wayne,” Megamind said. Roxanne looked to Wayne who was staring at the big man who looked like him. She watched him glance at all the holograms, then to Megamind. 

“It’s three of them.” Wayne said. 

“They are all your parents,” said Megamind calmly. Wayne was frowning. 

“What?” 

“Oh, don’t worry, Old Friend. I’m sure this won’t eat away at the morality of the nuclear family,” said Megamind drily. He was trying to joke, Roxanne realized. She smiled brightly at that, relief flushing over her at the new change. 

Megamind sobbing into Minion’s shoulder had unsettled her — scared her, even. She had wanted to hug him too, even if at the time she didn’t understand why he was sad. It felt nice so see him joke.

“Turns out, this combination is actually  _ our  _ species version of a nuclear family.” 

“How is that even possible?” asked Wayne. 

“I’m an alien  _ engineer _ , not a  _ biologist _ ,” Megamind said, but without any real bite. He gestured to the holograms and they disappeared. “It’s like trying to piece together a puzzle, except the puzzle is of something the ones who made it thought was obvious, and you just don’t have that understanding of it. Unfortunately it seemed like our people was more concerned with saving their cultures, philosophies and sciences instead of including a high-shool biology textbook.”

He looked at Wayne thoughtfully. “Maybe they thought that since you most likely wouldn’t be able to reproduce anyway, it wouldn’t matter.” 

“Hey,” Wayne said, sounding offended. Megamind rolled his eyes. 

“Oh, come on, we both know there’s no way  _ this _ -” here he did a gesture to the entirety of Wayne’s physique — “have the ability to reproduce with  _ that _ .” Megamind gestured to Roxanne. Roxanne glared at him. 

“I don’t like being forced into your hypotheticals,” she said and crossed her arms. Megamind glanced at her for a brief second and if she didn’t know better she would say he was blushing. 

“Sorry.” He said meekly and turned back to Wayne. “Just, I know you know you’re infertile.” 

Now it was Roxanne’s turn to blush. Wayne was staring at Megamind. 

“I — how do  _ you _ know that?” he asked. 

“I hacked your medical records.” Megamind said calmly. 

“You hacked my medical records?” Wayne replied, not calm at all. “You — those are confidential!”

“I was curious,” said Megamind and shrugged. “You should get better internet-security if you don’t want people accessing things like that. That’s why trying to access  _ my _ confidential files downloads a malware on your computer that fries whatever device is being used.” 

“Why would you steal my medical records?” Wayne exclaimed. Megamind shrugged again. 

“No need to be defensive about it.” he said. “If it makes you feel better I’m incompatible with humans, too.” 

Wayne gaped at him. Roxanne watched the ceiling like it was the most fascinating thing she had ever seen. For a moment no one spoke, then Wayne seemed to compose himself. 

“I’m… sorry about that, Buddy,” he said silently. Roxanne dared to glance down from the ceiling just in time to see Megamind give Wayne a curious look before he made a grimace. 

“I — I guess I’m sorry you’re infertile, too,” Megamind said awkwardly. 

“Can we not use the word infertile?” Wayne asked. 

“Impotent?” Megamind offered. “Sterile? How do you feel about barren?” 

Wayne rubbed his neck. 

“To be honest, I don’t like any of those words.” he said slowly. 

“Incompatible, than,” Megamind said. 

“That makes us sound like computers,” said Wayne. Megamind shot him a sharp look. 

“You  _ wish _ you were optimized like a computer.” 

“How about we get back to the topic at hand instead of bickering,” said Roxanne calmly. She really didn’t know if it was a good idea or not to let them carry on like they were doing. It felt like it could easily dissolve back into an argument, and she wanted… she didn’t quite know. 

She didn’t want them to argue, she guessed. But there was also something else. The way Megamind had cried, and the way they had looked in the pictures… Megamind had been vulnerable then, and if Wayne and he was of the same species, they were the last survivors. Roxanne wanted them to  _ have _ that, somehow. 

She had this weird, heavy feeling in her stomach, and she felt like if she could mediate between them somehow that feeling would go away. 

Megamind looked at her and the feeling grew heavier, but Roxanne pushed that away. 

“How can I have  _ three _ parents?” said Wayne. Roxanne could see Megamind physically hold himself back from coming with a snarky reply. Instead, he just released a slow, heavy sigh. 

“Wayne, we are  _ aliens _ .” Megamind said. “It’s everything on Earth that is weird for us, not the other way around.” 

“Having three parents is weird, Buddy!” said Wayne and gestured with his hands. He must be really agitated, because he was starting to float back and forth, even though it didn’t look like Wayne was aware of that he was doing it. “How is that even possible?” 

“Three parents really isn’t that weird, even on Earth, Wayne,” Megamind said, apparently growing tired of Wayne. “You’re just  _ incredibly  _ vanilla.” 

“Well I am sorry that this is a little hard to take in!” Wayne snapped harshly. Megamind watched him float around the room, then he gave Roxanne a dark look, like ‘can you believe what I have to put up with?’ 

Roxanne stepped up and stopped Wayne in his float-pacing. He blinked at her like he had forgotten she was there. She smiled in what she hoped was a calming manner. 

“Do you need some air?” she asked. Wayne glanced towards Megamind who had turned away from them. He nodded. 

Roxanne led Wayne back to the roof, and they stood in silence for a while as Wayne was composing himself again. Roxanne watched him stare off into space. 

“Are you okay?” she asked. Wayne looked down at her. His face was hard-set and he shook his head. 

“I just — this is all new for me, and everything is just so easy for him.” Roxanne pursed her lips. 

“I don’t think it’s as easy for Megamind as you think it is, Wayne,” she said. She didn’t want to betray Megamind’s confidence, but telling Wayne a little wouldn’t be that bad, would it? 

“You don’t understand, Roxie,” said Wayne before she had the chance to say anything at all. “He’s always been into all this  _ space stuff _ , and I… it’s hard for me.

“I just wish that — that I was normal.” Wayne gestured around. “None of this is normal.” 

Roxanne looked to him, floating about a decimetre above the roof. She frowned. 

“Wayne — you can fly.” she said, not unkindly but sternly. “You can lift a truck. It’s not exactly normal to begin with.” 

Wayne made a face and rubbed his neck. 

“I know,” he said eventually. “I just mean that Buddy’s always been into space, and his species, and where we came from. For me, I think it’s hard to even admit I’m an…  _ an alien _ .” 

“You say that like it’s a bad thing,” Roxanne said. Wayne gave her a look. 

“Isn’t it?” he asked. Roxanne frowned at him. 

“No.” They stared at each other, and it didn’t look like Wayne believed her. Roxanne pointed down towards Megamind’s lair. “You think that Megamind and Minion are bad?”

Wayne made a face. “Well, they are villains.”

“Not what I meant,” Roxanne snapped and waved him off. “You think they are bad because they are  _ aliens _ ?” 

Wayne frowned and looked away from her. Roxanne kept her mouth until he broke the silence. 

“No, of course not,” Wayne said eventually. She nudged him with a shoulder. 

“So why would it be bad that  _ you _ are an alien?” 

Wayne made a pained face and stubbornly looked the other way. Roxanne frowned and put a hand on his arm. 

“Do you remember what you said to me when I told you I was trans?” she asked. Wayne ignored her, so Roxanne tugged a little at him. He didn’t bulge, but he did glance at her. Roxanne smiled. “You said that there was nothing that would change your opinion of me. 

“The same is true for you, Wayne. There is  _ nothing _ that would change my opinion of you. Being trans is part of who I am; the same way being bisexual or having brown hair is who I am.” Roxanne laughed, and it was only a little nervously. “And some of those things used to scare _ the shit _ out of me, but once I embraced them, they actually enriched my life.

“I won’t say that you don’t have the right to be scared of different parts of your identity, but I’m here for you.” Roxanne cleared her throat. “I think Megamind and Minion could be there for you too, if you let them.” 

“Buddy used to try and talk to me about our planets when we were kids. To be honest, it scared me. I  _ hated _ it when he tried.” Wayne sighed and rubbed his neck again. “I was an asshole to him whenever he said anything.” 

Roxanne tried to not show the surprise on her face. Wayne and Megamind had known each other since they were  _ kids _ ? That actually explained a few things. That weird mixture of familiarity and rivalry between them, the ease they had around each other sometimes, while at other times they appeared completely at odds with each other. 

She tried to imagine the two of them as kids, though, and found it hard. Wayne was just equal to  _ big _ for her, and Megamind as a kid felt odd. Like a mixture of unbelievable and probably really fricking cute. Roxanne shook her head from that mental image and focused back on Wayne. 

“I could kind of read some tension between the lines,” Roxanne said slowly. 

She didn’t get it, though. There were just lots of things that didn’t seem to fit together. For instance, where did the pictures of them kissing fit in with the animosity between them today? Roxanne bit her lip.

“Listen, Wayne,” she said and shifted her weight. “When Megamind saw your mom for the first time, when the message came on — he was crying. He’s not totally cool with this, no matter what you think.”

Wayne looked her, his gaze suddenly sharp. 

“He was?” he asked, almost startled. Roxanne blinked at the intensity but nodded. She felt kind of bad for sharing that, but at the same time, maybe a bit of honesty was what they needed. Wayne frowned. “I’ve never seen him cry.”

“Shall we go down again?” Roxanne asked, pushing the guilty feeling down to the pit of her stomach. Wayne sighed but nodded. 

“Yeah, okay.” 

* * *

When Roxanne had led Metro Man to the roof, Megamind had turned his back towards them. Minion faced him when they disappeared. 

“Sir? Is everything alright?” 

Megamind sighed and looked at the pod. There was so many ways to answer that question. Was he alright with apparently being the same species as his arch-nemesis? 

Maybe. Well, both yes and no. He had always thought that he was the only one left of his species, and as much as he considered Minion a brother, they obviously were not the same. It was lonely being the only survivor, trapped on a piece of shit planet that were xenophobic even to their  _ own _ people, let alone him and Minion that so physically looked different. That Wayne was like him felt… odd. Like the notion mattered while it at the same time didn’t matter at all. 

Wayne and he were nothing alike. They didn’t even look alike, so their sameness were not even skin-deep. But Megamind thought back on the large, silver-haired man he had seen in his earliest memories, who had collected debris to construct his escape pod and had seemed so interested and genuinely happy to see him, even if it was just once in both of their lives. 

He didn’t like to dwell on it. The way he saw it, now he had just another ghost to haunt him. Another parent dead into the cold, uncaring mass that was the black hole. 

Or did Minion wonder if everything was alright with the fact that Wayne was some sort of chosen survivor and Megamind was basically some white trash that managed to escape death? That notion had felt easier to swallow when they were not of the same species, because then it had been Megamind’s people who had tried their best, and Wayne’s separate people had designed the fancy, sleek and golden space-ship that Metro Baby had rolled into Earth with. 

Now, when those people were one and the same it became obvious that Wayne Scott had always been rich and important, even before he was Wayne Scott, and Megamind had been dirt-poor and unimportant even before he ended up in prison as a baby. 

It was unfair. Unfair that Wayne got everything handed to him, even when he had done nothing to deserve it except been born with great hair and the ability to fly. 

Or were Minion referring to more present matters? Like the fact that the Doom Syndicate had pictures of Metro Man pushing Megamind up against a wall and kissing him? The Doom Syndicate that now, probably, were really fucking pissed; not only because Roxanne possibly shot a few of them, but also because their plan to usurp Megamind as Metro City’s reining Overlord failed. 

He needed to deal with that. He needed to destroy those pictures before they could be used against him. Except that he didn’t know where the negatives were, or where or how many copies were already made. He didn’t even know who had taken the pictures to begin with. 

Metro Man and he were the same fucking species, and on top of that Megamind was about to have his reputation ruined because Wayne couldn’t keep his own biological instincts to himself. That thought made him frown even deeper. 

Biological instincts of Metro Man’s that involved Megamind. That obviously had been completely acceptable among their own people, if the hologram of the Hajrka dynasty and his memories of the three-way relationship of his own parents were to be trusted, but on Earth made everything in Megamind’s body to scream  _ ‘abort!’  _

He couldn’t be queer as well as blue. Definitely not queer with Metro Man, of all people. 

Except that that was natural for their species, wasn’t it? And Megamind hadn’t… well, he hadn’t hated Wayne kissing him that time. He hadn’t loved it, either, but if the subsequent outing to the Doom Syndicate had proved anything, it was that he wanted to decide over it himself. He wanted to be able to choose. He wanted at least the option to decide for himself if it should be explored or not. 

“Sir?” Minion said, but before Megamind had to reply he heard Roxanne and Wayne in the stairs again. He steeled his face and turned to face them. Both looked a little rosy-cheeked, like the air had been cold up there. Or if they’d been snogging each other. 

Wayne was the first one to speak. 

“I’m sorry I snapped at you,” he said and rubbed his neck. “I’m just — I’m not as quick as you. It takes longer for me to get stuff.” 

Megamind raised an eyebrow. It felt weird being acknowledged as smart by Wayne, but Megamind recognized an olive branch when he saw one. He sighed. 

“I’m sorry I called you vanilla,” he said. 

“Well, you weren’t wrong,” said Roxanne mischievously. Both Wayne and Megamind looked at her surprised and she grinned. Megamind couldn’t help it. He laughed. 

Wayne was gaping like a fish on dry land and blushed a deep red. 

“I plead the fifth,” he said eventually. Roxanne’s blue eyes sparkled when she looked at Megamind. Megamind chuckled and shook his head. 

“Here.” he said and handed a homebuilt iPad to Metro Man. “You can use it to go through stuff, if you’d like. The machine translates to English pretty well.” 

“How did you manage to translate so quickly?” Wayne asked and looked at him. 

“Well, I was only eight days old, so obviously I hadn’t learned to read yet, but I did understand speech.” Megamind shrugged. “I used your mother’s message as the base, and then the computer is searching through that script to translate what is most likely being said.

“It still has a few issues, but then again, her message wasn’t that long.” 

“Almost like the Rosetta Stone,” Roxanne said excitedly. Megamind nodded. 

“Kind of,” he agreed. 

“So what, I should just… go through this?” asked Wayne. 

“Well… it is your ship,” Megamind admitted unwillingly and looked at the pod. He shook his head. He had more pressing matters to attend. Like dealing with the Doom Syndicate and try to rescue his empire. “I have other work to do.” 

Wayne glanced at him and Megamind petted his shoulder after a brief consideration. 

“You got this.” he said. 

“I can help you go through stuff if you want,” Roxanne offered. Megamind left them to their own devices. He saw Minion eye him, but ducked away before the fish could catch him. 

He really didn’t want to answer if everything was okay right now. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hope you enjoy the chapter! I feel like it maybe is a little all over the place, so some feedback would be greatly appreciated.


	14. Divide and conquer

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The Doom Syndicate have not forgot their broken deal and they do not forgive.

Megamind was trying to locate the members of the Doom Syndicate, but without any luck. Rumour was that Destruction Worker had been sighted Downtown, but nothing about Psycho Delic, Hot Flash or Lady Doppler. It frustrated him, because it meant that the Doom Syndicate were playing it smarter than he gave them credit for. 

He was reviewing footage from a brainbot on the upper-east-side when Minion appeared next to him with a tray. 

“I’ve made some food, Sir.” he said and navigated the plate into Megamind’s lap whether he wanted it or not. 

On the tray was a bowl of Minion’s famous gumbo, and Megamind’s stomach growled just at the smell of it, so he didn’t argue when Minion pushed a fork into his hand. 

“Thank you, Minion.” he said and glanced at his friend. “Are they..?” 

“Still reading through the information, Sir,” Minion said. “I figured you didn’t wish to eat with them.”

Megamind shook his head and glanced back to the monitors. Minion sat down on the desk and watched him silently. Shifting in his seat, Megamind eventually started eating.

“What are you working on?” Minion asked. 

“Trying to locate the Doom Syndicate.”

“They could turn out to be a real problem for Miss Ritchi.” Minion said agreeably and bobbled up and down in his bowl. Megamind frowned. 

Forget Roxanne, they could be a real problem for Megamind. He shifted to review footage from another brainbot. 

“Of course, now Metro Man is back, so she will be safe.” Minion said thoughtfully.

“She would have been safe to begin with if he hadn’t left Metrocity.” Megamind muttered through gritted teeth. At the corner of his eye he could see Minion peer at him curiously. Megamind sighed. “What?” 

“It just occurred to me before when you were talking with Metro Man, Sir,” he said thoughtfully. “About incompatibility with humans? If your species required two genetically male inputs to create offspring, does that mean that technically you and Metro Man would be able to reproduce?” 

Megamind almost suffocated on the gumbo. 

“What?” he coughed and stared at Minion. Minion didn’t look like he had any malice with his words, though, but tapped the glass of his dome thoughtfully.

“Well, I read an article a few months ago about using spinal fluid to extract DNA, which could then be used to fertilize eggs. The article was talking about people who were unable to reproduce through natural means, such as two women, could have a biological child that way. And if Metro Man have three biological parents, perhaps the missing ingredient to both of your infertility is — well, each other, Sir.” 

Megamind’s entire face was hot. Like burning. He looked away from Minion and tried to compose himself. 

“Sir?” Minion asked, hesitantly. 

“I don’t think it’s suitable to speculate about such matters, Minion,” he practically shouted and pushed the tray back into Minion’s hands. “Now, speak no more of it, I have to work.” 

Minion watched him for a moment, then stood up. 

“Alright, then. I’ll go and help Metro Man and Miss Ritchi.” 

“Yes, good idea.” Megamind screeched in that loud way and buried his head by the monitors. Before Minion had the time to leave however, a distant explosion took them both by surprise. 

“What was that?” Minion said and looked around. 

Megamind frowned. It had sounded like a bomb. He pulled up a few feeds on the monitors at the same time as Metro Man flew into the room. 

“Did you —” Wayne asked. Megamind ignored him and found a camera angle that displayed Metro City downtown. Roxanne ran in after Wayne the moment Megamind caught sight of Destruction Worker and a partly crumbling Metro Bridge. 

“What’s going on?” Roxanne asked. Megamind nodded to the screen. 

“Destruction Worker, on eleventh.” 

“On it,” said Wayne. 

“It could be a trap —” said Megamind, but as he turned Wayne was already gone. “Son of a bi—! He never listens to me.” 

He looked to Roxanne who have him an awkward shrug. “Did you see that? He didn’t even wait.”

Roxanne ignored him and came closer to the monitors. 

“What’s Destruction Worker up to?” she asked. “Can you change the angle?” 

Megamind did as she asked and the video followed Destruction Worker as he set off another explosion. Debris was flying and the people in sight were running for cover. Just as one of the support pillar of the bridge was about to collapse Metro Man appeared on sight and lifted the falling bridge. Roxanne gasped in delight like she always did when Metro Man saved the day, her eyes glued on the monitor. 

Something started beeping from the lair. 

“Sir,” Minion pointed to the little communication device lying on the desk. “It’s Mitch.” 

Megamind frowned and tore his eyes away from Roxanne watching Metro Man’s fight. 

“What?” 

“Who’s Mitch?” asked Roxanne. 

“Oh, he’s one of our lieutenants,” said Minion helpfully. 

“Minion!” Megamind snapped, grabbed the device and shot Roxanne a distrusting look. “Stop telling her all our secrets!” 

Roxanne rolled her eyes and nodded towards the device. “Looks like Mitch really wants to get a hold of you.” 

Roxanne was right. The device kept beeping and vibrating in Megamind’s hands, and Megamind twisted so at least Roxanne was behind him before he answered. 

“Mitch, can this wait, we’re following the fight downtown.” he said. The device screeched awfully, then Mitch’s voice came through, coughing his lungs out. 

“Boss!” Mitch screamed, but he was so hoarse it was barely over a whisper. “Delic — Old Spice district — he’s poisoned them.” 

Megamind’s eyes widened and he spun around in his chair again, pushing Roxanne out of the way as he locked the monitors to the Old Spice districts. 

Called Old Spice as a kind of homage to the perfumed scent that allegedly used to surround the district because of all the sex work that was being done in the area, Old Spice was home to a lot of Metro City’s poorest. It was cheap rent and cheap brothels, and it was under Megamind’s protection. Sex work could be dangerous for the workers, and in exchange for fees Megamind kept Old Spice safe.

But what appeared on the monitor was anything but safe. There was a thick, greenish fog over the street, and when Megamind jumped camera into one of the brothels the fog was there as well. People were scattered all over the floor, alive but coughing and apparently without any strength to get up. Through one camera angle Megamind saw the corner of Psycho Delic’s purple boots. 

Behind him Roxanne gasped and covered her mouth. Megamind gritted his teeth and lifted the device to his mouth. 

“Mitch, I’m coming.” 

* * *

Megamind jumped up from his seat and ran past Roxanne. She shot the monitors a horrified glance and followed after him to the main lair. Minion was also in motion, running to the lab where he had constructed Roxanne’s own antidote. 

“I’ll try to take forth a serum,” Minion said. Megamind nodded and whistled for some brainbots that he put into work before running to the hover bike. 

“What should I do?” Roxanne asked. Megamind, half-way up on his bike, stopped and stared at her. 

“You stay here,” he said. Roxanne flinched but set her chin. 

“I can help!”

“I know,” Megamind said. That shut her up from arguing further, and she frowned. 

“Then why am I staying here?” 

“Because this is obviously revenge,” Megamind snapped. “Two attacks on two different parts of the city at the same time? Stay here where it’s safe, Roxanne.” 

“You and Metro Man isn’t staying where it’s safe,” Roxanne snapped. Megamind grimaced. 

“This isn’t the Game, Roxanne!” he snapped. “You’re staying here.” 

And with that, Megamind revved the bike to life and shot off. Roxanne stared after him and had she held anything she would have tossed it after him. 

“You can help me, Miss Ritchi,” said Minion. 

Roxanne didn’t argue with him, or snap at him for being left behind or being a spare wheel. Instead, she walked up to him. 

“What can I do?” she asked. 

Minion gave her a couple of vials and petri dishes. “Take these to the centrifuge over there, three minutes for each, then add some of this.” 

He tapped on a large container full of some liquid. Roxanne didn’t know what it was, but it had a skull and crossbones on it, so she assumed it needed to be handled with care. 

Roxanne did as Minion asked, and soon she had filled all dishes with what became a foul-smelling slime when it was mixed with the skull-and-bones liquid. She made a face. 

“What is this?” she asked and handed one dish over to Minion. He took it with extreme care and put it under a microscope. 

“Every known compound Psycho Delic have used in the past.” he said and peered at it. Roxanne was allowed to look after he was done. 

“So what do we do now?” she asked. 

“We have to test certain concoctions and see their result.” Minion said and walked off for a moment. When he came back he held a little cage with three mice. Roxanne stared at them. 

“On them?” she asked. 

“Are you alright, Miss?” asked Minion. She shook her head and looked at him. 

“I don’t agree with animal-testing, Minion,” she said. Minion placed the cage down gently and nodded. 

“A worthy opinion, Miss,” Minion said mirthlessly. “But Delic’s poisons are too dangerous to use human subjects, so it is the only way.” 

Roxanne frowned. 

“Is there no other way?” she asked. 

“Not that I am aware of, Miss.” Roxanne was just about to reluctantly agree when another alarm went off. The entire lair sounded like a tornado-siren, and Roxanne had to cover her ears. Minion ran back to the monitors Megamind had sat in front of before and started typing something, but then the power went out. Everything became dark and completely silent. 

Roxanne let go of her aching ears. 

“What’s going on?” she asked and tried to make her way over to Minion. Luckily Minion had a torch built in his suit, so quickly she could see again. Minion was frowning and put a finger over his bowl to hush her. 

“We’re not supposed to lose power,” he whispered when she was close enough. “Back-up generators.” 

Roxanne tried to see out in the dark, but every window of the lair had seemed to have been covered up with well insulated curtains and besides the little spot of light from Minion’s flashlight, everything was pitch black. 

“Turn off your light,” Roxanne whispered back to him, but before Minion had the chance a lightning bolt appeared in the dark. It bounced between every electric device, illuminating the entire lair for a brief second. Roxanne could see as it fried every device, bouncing into the air and hitting the few brainbots still in the lair before the bolt settled directly in Minion’s suit. 

Roxanne saw Minion drop like a sack of potatoes, then everything went black again. She dropped to the floor and scrambled to find Minion’s body. His suit was so heavy that she barely managed to bulge it, and for a second she cursed whoever came up with the idea to make Minion into a gorilla. 

“Minion?” she whispered. 

“Here, Miss,” Minion said in the dark. He sounded alright. “The suit is fried. Quick, there’s an emergency button in my armpit.” 

Roxanne felt around until she found Minion’s armpit, and when she pressed the button under it she heard a faint woosh and something that rolled away. She felt something, like a ball, bounce against her leg. 

“Pick me up, Miss,” said Minion. Roxanne grabbed where she had heard Minion’s voice, a cold ball that she clutched to her chest. 

“We need to get out of here.” said Roxanne. Peering in the dark did nothing, but she knew they couldn’t stay here. It wasn’t hard to put a few things together, and Lady Doppler was definitely the reason for the lightning-bolt that had disabled Megamind’s devices. This wasn’t a two-point attack, it was a divide and conquer. 

“There’s an exit back through the kitchen.” Minion whispered. 

“But where’s the kitchen?” Roxanne whispered back. 

From the ball a soft, bluish-green light appeared. Roxanne blinked down on in her arms and saw Minion, turning a few spots on his face bioluminescence to light up the path. 

“I didn’t know you could do that,” Roxanne said. 

“Hurry,” said Minion and made a few illustrative eyebrow twitches in the direction he wanted her to take them. Roxanne stood up and ran. She had just reached the kitchen when a similar lightning-bolt appeared again. She barely had a chance to notice it when it struck her, making her entire body freeze up and drop to the floor. Roxanne felt an excruciating pain, but she couldn’t scream. She just twisted as the electricity rocked through her. 

“Miss Ritchi,” she vaguely heard Minion shout, then she passed out. 

* * *

“You shouldn’t have struck her so hard,” said a distance voice. Roxanne’s head hurt, and the sound was unwelcome. There was something she needed to remember, but everything ached and all she wanted to do was to curl up in a ball and cry. Possibly pass out again. 

“Well, it’s not as easy as I make it look, Flash,” another voice snapped. “I’m controlling lighting, here. It’s not like I can twist the settings.” 

“That would have been preferable,” said a third voice. Roxanne recognized it as Minion. 

“Shut up, Fish brain.” said the first voice. 

She needed to remember something about Minion, didn’t she? He was hurt. Or — not hurt, but his suit… what had happened to his suit? Where was Megamind in all of this? Roxanne groaned and with a massive push managed to open her eyes. 

Roxanne wasn’t in the lair anymore. The place looked vaguely familiar, but she couldn’t recognize where she was, and the light was painful against her eyes. She squinted and made out the contours of Lady Doppler and Hot Flash. Hot Flash held Minion, who was seemed safe in a glass-ball. 

“What — happened?” Roxanne asked and pushed herself up from the sofa she was lying on. 

“Miss Ritchi, you’re awake!” Minion said, sounding relieved. 

At that, her memory rushed back to her. She recalled the lighting that had struck the lair’s electronics, then her. She also realized she was at work. 

Roxanne rubbed her head and glanced at the villains. 

“What do you want?” she said, sounding tougher than she felt. If push came to shove, Roxanne was probably more likely to puke than manage to put up a fight against them. 

“We had a deal with Megamind,” said Lady Doppler. “Yet he failed to honour that deal.” 

“Technically, the deal involved Psycho Delic giving me the antidote,” said Roxanne. “And he didn’t do that, did he, so the deal’s off.” 

“We’re not here to argue schematics,” said Hot Flash angrily. “We’ve moved past the deal.” 

Roxanne frowned and glanced between them. Neither one looked happy, but there was also an air of smugness around them. She didn’t like the look at all. 

“What does that mean?” Roxanne asked. Lady Doppler shrugged, making her long, white hair put up in her ponytail to bobble around her. 

“Megamind refuses to leave Metro City, we’ll make Metro City so inhospitable to him he’ll have no fucking choice but go.” she said calmly. 

“No one fucks with the Doom Syndicate,” said Hot Flash, less calmly. “Not even Megamind.” 

“How are you going to do that, then?” She asked, feeling cheeky. “Metro Man is back now, so it’s only a matter of time before he comes and stops whatever you’ve got planned.” 

“Metro Man is busy with Destruction Worker,” said Lady Doppler and grinned. “He’s not going to come to rescue one girl over the life of all those innocent civilians Downtown. And if Metro Man somehow manages to deal with it ahead of schedule, the Conductor and Judge Sludge is standing by.

“We have plenty of time before we need to worry about the big guy, and by then the damage will already be done.” 

Roxanne frowned. She knew Lady Doppler was right. Even if she now shouted her head off for Wayne, even though he would hear her, he wouldn’t come. Not when there were so many lives at stake. 

“And just what is it that you’re going to do?” she asked. Lady Doppler and Hot Flash grinned. 

“We’re not going to do anything.” said Hot Flash. “You are.” 

Lady Doppler pulled out the file Roxanne had seen in the warehouse, the one that contained the pictures of Wayne and Megamind kissing. She could feel her frown deepen. 

“That’s your plot?” she asked. “Spread pictures? What is that going to accomplish?” 

Lady Doppler ignored her and opened the file. She chose one of the pictures and held out for Roxanne to see. It was the one of the actual kiss. Lady Doppler then angled the photograph and showed Minion. 

Minion’s eyes grew large and he made an involuntary gasp. 

“See, the fish gets it.” said Lady Doppler. Roxanne glanced at Minion who looked horrified at what he had seen. 

“It’s just pictures,” said Roxanne defensively. 

“Should we explain it to her, or do you want to?” Hot Flash asked and held up Minion. Minion glanced between them and then to Roxanne. He hesitated for a second and looked at the picture again, his face extremely torn. 

“There are… codes in our work. People’s credibility is everything.” Minion said slowly. “If — if those pictures came out, Megamind’s cred would be ruined.” 

“But why?” Roxanne frowned. 

“Metro City’s Overlord being a sleeve warmer for Metro Man?” Lady Doppler laughed. “Please, no one will take him seriously ever again.” 

“Shut up,” Roxanne snapped and glared at her. “You don’t know what you’re talking about.” 

“It doesn’t matter, these pictures says it all.” said Doppler. Roxanne looked around the office, empty and a bit turned over, like people had left in a hurry.

“Is that why we’re at the station?” she asked. “So you can get the pictures on TV?” 

“Yes,” said Doppler. Roxanne snorted. 

“That’s a stupid idea.” Roxanne snorted. “Do you even know how to get it broadcasted?” 

“We have help,” said Hot Flash and walked over to a desk. She manoeuvred Minion to hold in one hand, then she grabbed something and pulled up. 

“Ow, mind the hair!” Hal screeched as he appeared behind the desk. 

Fucking shit, thought Roxanne. Hal would know how to broadcast. She gritted her teeth together and looked to Lady Doppler. 

“So, you’ll just get on air and show the pictures? Why would people believe you? What’s from stopping them thinking you’ve made it up to hurt Megamind’s ‘cred’?” 

“We already told you.” said Doppler. “We’re not going to tell anyone. You will. And whatever Roxanne Ritchi reports about Megamind and Metro Man just  _ have _ to be true.” 

Here she fluttered her eyelashes. Roxanne’s stomach dropped. 

They wanted her to go on air and ruin Megamind’s criminal credibility by claiming — reporting, she corrected. The pictures were authentic. Megamind’s reaction to them when they were alone in the lair had convinced her as such — by reporting that Megamind and Metro Man had been seen kissing on random streets of Metro? 

“No.” Roxanne said and shook her head. “I won’t do it.” 

Lady Doppler gestured to Hot Flash. Her hands started to glow brightly. Hal started screaming like her touch was burning him, and Minion seemed to be panicking. 

“Kill the fish, first,” said Doppler. “We need the camera-man.” 

Hot Flash let go of Hal who stumbled to the floor. She focused all her attention to Minion. 

“Stop, stop, stop!” Roxanne shouted. Hot Flash’s hands stopped glowing, but she didn’t lower Minion’s ball. 

“Now you’re getting it,” Lady Doppler said, watching Roxanne critically. “Either you get in front of the camera, or Hot Flash figures out how long it takes to boil fish.” 

Roxanne looked at Minion, hoping that he’d give her some lead, but the heat must have made him disoriented, because he was looking a bit ill. She took a deep breath. 

“Okay.” she said. “But promise that Minion and Hal won’t get hurt.” 

“Last time we tried deals with you, it didn’t go well.” said Doppler harshly. “This isn’t a negotiation. Do this, or they all die.” 

* * *

Psycho Delic’s smoke had completely engulfed the streets of Old Spice when Megamind got there, and humans had gathered at the edges staring at it in shock. A news team were already there filming it all. 

Megamind drove the hover bike down close enough for the humans to hear him. 

“Everyone that can still walk, take off your jackets or shirts and wear them as masks. Gather everyone that can’t walk on their own and take them to higher ground!” He shouted. For a moment everyone just stared at him. The camera zoomed in. “ _ Now _ !” 

They all jumped into motion, and Megamind flew off into the middle of the district. He had managed to reverse the signal Mitch had used and located the right building. Megamind landed the hover bike on the roof and made his way in through the fire-escape. Even though he was usually unaffected by Delic’s drugs he took the precaution to also wear a mask. 

The building he had landed on was an apartment-complex, worn-down flats that were too small and filled with too many people to be sanitary, and once he got inside he could see that Delic’s smoke had filtered through the entire building. Even through the mask he could smell a rank, putrid stink, like rotten eggs.

Megamind walked through the first flat, sitting down and taking the pulse of the first human he came across, lying lifeless on the floor. They were alive, but whatever Delic had given them had obviously caused them to pass out. Quickly Megamind took a blood sample from the lifeless human and handed it over to a brainbot. 

“Take this immediately to Minion,” he ordered. The brainbot flew off, and Megamind had the rest of the brainbots search the buildings and move as many people as they could to non-polluted ground. 

Once he was out in the hallway it looked like people had realized the apartments were filling up with smoke and had tried to escape. Megamind had to carefully step over a pregnant woman who, before she had gone down, had clutched her young toddler to her. He made sure the brainbots took with the kid’s teddy before they whisked them away. 

Mitch was on the fourth floor. Megamind didn’t quite know what he expected, but Mitch was out cold just like everybody else. Megamind slapped him a few times, but it seemed to have no effect. 

“Shit.” Megamind said and carried on. Delic had really outdone himself. This was a massive dope, spreading over at least five blocks. Megamind couldn’t remember the last time Delic had produced such a large quantity — although it did make him hopeful that the old psychopath would be exhausted by the time he caught up with him. He also hoped that Minion would have a cure ready quickly. 

Megamind didn’t have to look hard for Delic. He was at his old headquarters, the one that Megamind had driven him out of when he took over Old Spice. Megamind walked through the brothel and into the office above. 

“Even you have to be smart enough to realise that this is war, Delic” Megamind said as he stepped through the doorway. Delic was sitting in a big armchair, fumes circling around his head. A television was on in the corner, and Delic turned to face him when he stepped in. The man grinned and his purple skin grew taut over his skull. 

“Megamind,” he said slowly. “You made it.” 

Megamind stopped in the middle of the room. 

“Reverse the drug and I’ll forgive this overpass,” he said collectedly. Delic laughed. 

“Oh, come on,” he said and grinned wider. “It’s just us boys now. Indulge me a little.” 

Megamind raised an eyebrow. “Indulge what?” 

Psycho Delic leaned back in his seat and drummed his fingers over the desk. 

“Well, I always knew you were a freak, but how long have you been fucking Metro Man?” Delic laughed and shook his head. “We’ve all seen what he’s packing in those tights.” 

Megamind grimaced. 

“I don’t have time for this, Delic. Give the antidote, now.” 

Delic just laughed again. 

“Remember when you first came here — a little shit, barely dry behind the ears, then.” Delic peered over his sunglasses at him. “I helped you out, Megamind. You know I did.” 

Megamind didn’t like thinking about it. Psycho Delic’s help was always shit-in-disguise, and the Old Spice had been quite different when Delic ran the show. 

“That was a long time ago.” Megamind said tight-lipped. Delic nodded. 

“What was it you used to call me — uncle, right?” Delic grinned. “We’re family, all the outcasts of Metro City.” 

“Is this how you treat family?” said Megamind and gestured out through the window at the thick fog that made everyone collapse when they inhaled it. Delic shrugged his shoulders casually, like they were talking about the weather. 

“People get hurt when family fight.” he said and touched his chest. “I don’t want to fight with you; trust me, Megamind. 

“I want you to back off on restrictions. You’re killing my business with all your regulations.” 

“Without regulations you end up killing half your customers through overdoses.” said Megamind. “That’s not a viable business plan.” 

“It’s been a little rough in the past,” Psycho Delic admitted. “But I’ve learned my lesson. And you’re right. Dead customers don’t come back for more.” 

He grinned a dark smile. 

“Now, come on. We’ve talked business before. Let’s negotiate.” Delic gestured to the chair in front of him. “You give me something I want, I give you something you want. Like the antidote to cure our lovely little family.” 

Megamind hesitated. It wasn’t like he trusted Delic, but negotiation was better than fighting. If he could decide, it was usually his preferred way of doing things. Negotiate first, fight as last resort. The only one that was excluded from that was Metro Man. Megamind walked over to the desk and sat down. 

“Alright, what do you want?” 

“Back off on restrictions.” said Delic. “I want to expand onto east-side, as well as Downtown. A fifty percent increase.” 

“Twenty percent increase,” Megamind countered. “Fifty and the prices drop. Becomes too easy to get hold of goods.”

“It’s a smart move.” Delic admitted thoughtfully and nodded. “But I want a growing increase to fifty by June.” 

Megamind snorted. “June? That’s way too soon. How about next December?” 

“That’s too long,” said Delic and glared at him. Megamind put his face to the side and raised an eyebrow. 

“What’s your rush?” he asked. Delic made a clucking sound and smoked in some of his own fumes. He watched Megamind thoughtfully. 

“Next September?” he said. Megamind did some quick calculations in his head and nodded. 

“Next September could be done.” he said slowly. “But we’re talking grade-A quality, not that shit you put on the streets two years ago.” 

Psycho Delic raised his hands in defence. “I told you the batch got bad. A slight miscalculation; it won’t happen again.” 

“It fucking better not,” said Megamind. He watched Delic. “Do we have a deal, then?” 

Delic put his head to the side and seemed to consider it. 

“Yeah,” he said and turned to face the TV in the corner. “I just wanna watch this before I give ‘em the antidote.” 

Megamind snarled. “Delic, the deal is now or never; no fucking watching a commercial break!” 

Psycho Delic put a finger over his lips and hushed him. He raised the volume with a remote he held in his hands. 

“This is Roxanne Ritchi, reporting live.” the television said. Megamind tore his eyes away from Delic and focused on it. 

There indeed, on the screen, was Roxanne Ritchi. In front of a green screen and looking like shit. Her face was scrunched up like she was in pain, and her hair was standing on all ends. She kept glancing to something beyond the camera angle and the whole thing looked quite different from her usual style. 

“What the -” Megamind said. He had left Roxanne in the lair with Minion. 

Oh no. No. No, no, no! 

Roxanne was silent, her lips pursed. 

“Do it,” snapped Hot Flash from being the camera. 

“These pictures just in, Metro City,” Roxanne said flatly, sounding like she read off a script. “The city’s resident hero, Metro Man, seen kissing the supervillain, Megamind, under the street lights.” 

The screen flipped from Roxanne to Wayne and him. Megamind couldn’t breathe. The picture stayed on impossibly long, then it cut back to Roxanne, glowering at the people behind the camera. 

“Have Metro Man tamed this monster?” she said with a grimace. “This is Roxanne Ritchi, reporting.” 

The news cut off, onto channel 8’s report of Metro Man and Destruction Worker Downtown. 

Megamind steadied his shaking body. Psycho Delic started laughing. 

“You fucking idiot.” Delic said through his laughter. Megamind shot him with the de-gun without tearing his eyes away from the screen. Metro Man was tossing a car at Destruction Worker. 

Megamind was ruined. Wayne… had ruined him. Roxanne had ruined him. 

Megamind screamed. 

* * *

Roxanne watched the red light of the camera switch off and glared at Lady Doppler and Hot Flash. 

“There, are you happy now?” 

The villains looked at each other and shrugged. 

“Sure,” Lady Doppler said casually, like they were discussing their favourite rugby team, and not the outing of Metro Man and Megamind. On city wide TV. Roxanne felt like she needed to throw up. 

“Oh, how I wish I could have seen his face.” said Hot Flash and laughed. “Delic should have recorded it.” 

“Delic’s too old to know  _ how _ to work a camera,” said Doppler. 

In Hot Flash arms, Minion seemed to have recovered somewhat, and he drew Roxanne’s gaze with a bunch of well-manouvered fin-moves. She saw him pointedly look towards the window. Roxanne followed his gaze until it landed on a brainbot peering its eyestalk over the window ledge. 

‘Open,’ Minion mouthed silently. Roxanne nodded and looked back at Lady Doppler and Hot Flash before she slowly moved to the window. She turned her back on them once she reached the window and quickly fumbled with the locks. 

“What are you doing -” Lady Doppler said, but Roxanne got the window open and in flew the brainbot in lightning-speed. 

“Duck,” screamed Minion and Roxanne had just time to drop to the floor before a smoke bomb filled up the room. Lady Doppler released a flash of lightning towards her but missed by a millimetre. 

Roxanne fumbled with her hands along the floor, but she didn’t have to crawl long before the brainbot appeared next to her. In its skinny limbs it held Minion, having somehow managed to tear the ball away from Hot Flash. Roxanne took Minion, grabbed the bot by the arm and let it guide her through the smoke. 

They reached the hallway where she could see again, and she ran as fast as she could to the stairs. Behind her, she could hear shouting and people running after her. She reached the door to the stairs and fumbled it open. Looking back she could see Hal, running from Hot Flash. 

“Hal, hurry!” she shouted, then as he zoomed past her, she slammed the door shut and held it. Hal kept on running and the door shook when Hot Flash slammed at it. Roxanne kept pushing, trying to keep her out. 

“Hal, take Minion with you!” Roxanne shouted, but Hal was already down several flights of stairs. She wouldn’t be able to keep the door shut for long, and now she couldn’t even ensure that Minion at least escaped. 

“Get away from the lock,” Minion said. The brainbot pushed past Roxanne and started welding the door handle stuck, and Roxanne let go of the door in amazement. 

“Hurry, Miss!” Minion urged, and Roxanne started running down the stairs. 

Ten floors down in the garage, Roxanne had a stitch in her abdomen. Her body was aching from the lightning, and she felt like she was dying, but she kept running. That was, until Hal almost ran her over with the news van. 

He slammed the breaks down in the last second, barely avoiding hitting into her. 

“What the hell, Hal?” Roxanne screamed and ran around to get in the car. 

“I was just getting the car ready!” Hal screamed and floored the gas pedal the moment Roxanne was inside. The door slammed shut by the force and Roxanne fumbled a bit with the seat belt. 

“What the hell was all of that ‘bout?” Hal asked and glanced at her. 

Roxanne shook her head and held up Minion’s ball. 

“Minion, what do we do now?” 

“Well…” Minion looked thoughtful for a second. “All the different attacks were just a distraction, but the people of Old Spice still needs an antidote.” 

“But everything back at the lair got fried,” said Roxanne. Minion nodded. 

“We have to get to lair two,” said Minion. “Take the next roundabout and — is that the battle suit?” 

Roxanne followed Minion’s gaze and locked eyes on a huge robot suit, sprinting down the street towards Metro Downtown. Hal slammed the breaks for at as it ran past and both Roxanne and Minion stared after it. 

“Uh, was that Megamind?” Roxanne asked hesitantly. 

“Follow it,” screamed Minion. 

* * *

Metro Man carefully placed down an entire bus on the ground. The people spilled out through the doors and Metro Man turned back to Destruction Worker and his goons. It wasn’t the worst fight he had been in, but Destruction Worker had done his work before Wayne arrived, and buildings left to right kept going off in huge explosions. He had to buzz back and forth, rescuing civilians that got caught in the cross-fires, which left him with little time to deal with the villains themselves. 

And not to mention the forest fire had taken a lot out of him; and then finding out about his parents and that he and Buddy were the same species… his head wasn’t in the game, today. It was hard. He wanted to go home, put on a record and have a bath. Pretend that Metro Man and aliens and responsibilities didn’t exist for a while. 

Metro Man flew over to Destruction Worker and tried to wrestle the detonator out of his hand. Destruction Worker struggled, then he grew still. Wayne snatched the detonator triumphantly. 

“Aha!” he exclaimed. Destruction Worker tossed himself out of the way. Wayne blinked, then something hard rammed into him and sent him flying into the air. 

Wayne spun through the air several times before he managed to correct himself, and dropped the detonator. He twisted about, prepared to see another of the Doom Syndicate’s schemes. Instead, he saw Megamind in a robot-suit. Battle ready. Eyes blazing in a green fury. 

“You  _ fucking _ idiot,” Megamind snarled, the speakers on the suit enhancing his words. Wayne blinked, confused, then Megamind shot a laser at him. 

Wayne ducked, and Megamind kept shooting until Metro Man realized he was serious. They were fighting. 

Metro Man flew closer, avoiding lasers left and right. 

“What are you doing?” he screamed. This really wasn’t the time to start the Game. Wayne wasn’t in the mood. 

Apparently neither was Megamind. He pulled a light post right out of the ground and used it as a sword to try and hit Wayne with. Wayne steered clear from it a couple of times, then caught the end and lifted Megamind’s entire suit off the ground. Megamind somersaulted round him and the suit kicked Metro Man in the back, shooting him into a building. Wayne winced and dusted himself off. 

“Time out,” he gestured. Megamind shot him again. 

* * *

Roxanne and Minion arrived on sight as Megamind and Metro Man were locking heads. Roxanne jumped out of the van and started running towards them. 

“Roxanne!” Hal screamed but she ignored him. Megamind’s battle suit took a few tumbles after a hard hit from Metro Man, but the robot got onto it’s feet again.

“Why are you angry?” Roxanne heard Wayne shout as she pushed herself past an entire buss-ton of people gaping at the fight. Laurie from channel 8 was there, too, filming the entire thing. 

Megamind’s robot released a harsh sound which Roxanne eventually realized was Megamind laughing over the speakers. It was not a happy laugh, more on the verge of panic than anything else. 

So he had definitely seen the news, Roxanne thought to herself. By her side, Hal appeared, holding his camera over his shoulder. 

“Angry?” Megamind shouted after his laughter got caught in his throat. The robot kicked a car in Metro Man’s way. “Because you have fucking ruined me, Wayne, how about that?!”

“What have  _ I _ done?” Wayne shouted. Oh god. He didn’t know. Did he even know about the pictures? Roxanne hadn’t told him, and by the confused look she saw on Wayne’s face she guessed Megamind hadn’t either. 

“You can’t keep your biological fucking urges to yourself,” Megamind shouted back. Roxanne didn’t know robots could sneer, but powered by Megamind, in that moment the battle suit managed to. “Not Metro Mahn! Metro Mahn  _ have _ to have  _ everything _ he wants!” 

Megamind took a swing at him, only instead of ducking, this time Metro Man grabbed him by the arm. The ground was shaking with the force Wayne slammed the suit into the pavement, and in her arms she heard Minion gasp with the impact. Her own heart was in her throat. 

Roxanne started running again, towards the suit. The impact had broken the glass dome, and when Roxanne came close enough she saw Megamind fumble shakily from the control-panel. Wayne landed next to him and Megamind glared, then lost his footing. 

Wayne caught him, and for a moment nothing happened, then a few things happened at once. Megamind hit Wayne in the chest, then clung to his suit like Wayne’s body was the only thing keeping him standing.

“You fucking idiot,” he sniffled, and Roxanne realized he was crying again. Not the broken down cry she had seen in the lair, but through sheer anguish and frustration. Wayne steadied him and let him keep hitting him in the chest. 

“Tell me how I can help you,” she heard Wayne say gently. 

“You can’t  _ help _ me,” Megamind said, his voice trembling. Roxanne had never heard him sound so defeated as he did at that moment. 

“Sir!” Minion called out from in her arms, causing Megamind to flinch and turn to them. 

“Minion?” His gaze landed on Roxanne, then travelled down to Minion in her arms. Roxanne couldn’t read his expression when it was on her, but once it landed on Minion a bunch of emotions flashed over his face. Fear, relief, then something that looked like shame. 

‘Don’t tell Minion,’ he had whispered at her. 

“You can’t do this out in the open,” said Minion and Megamind’s face hardened. He straightened up, released the grip he had on Wayne’s suit and pulled away from Metro Man. Wayne’s hand hovered near his shoulder, but didn’t touch him. 

“Buddy, come on, talk to me.” 

Megamind ignored him and stumbled over to Roxanne. He held out his hands. For a second Roxanne didn’t know what he meant, but then she realised he wanted her to hand over Minion. Carefully she gave him over. 

“Megamind, I had — they were going to kill —” she said, but the words caught in her throat. Megamind pressed the glass orb close to his chest and met her gaze calmly. 

“You should have let me leave Metro City,” he said and turned away from her. Wayne reached after him. 

“Buddy -” there was a flash of blue as Megamind shot his de-gun at Wayne, who remained completely unaffected by it. 

“Oh, come on!” Wayne exclaimed. Megamind ignored him. Wayne looked to Roxanne and raised his hands. “What’s going on?” 

Hal pressed the camera in Roxanne’s face. 

“Cut the fucking camera, Hal!” 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I hope this chapter treats you well, my friends! Thank you for all your feedback over the last chapter, and I'm very happy all of you gave kind support of trans Roxanne! Sorry, Guess_This_Guest, you asked for happiness two chapters ago. Sadly I have not fulfilled your wish (YET!).


	15. St. Louis

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Metro Man gets brought up to speed on what's going on; Megamind breaks into the hospital and Roxanne is feeling guilty.

During the altercation between Wayne and Megamind Destruction Worker and his goons had managed to slip away. Wayne knew he should search for them, but he also wanted answers, so instead he led Roxanne to the closest diner that were still open. Metro City was so weird that it usually took more than a supervillain attack to close down shops, though, so they didn’t have to go far. When Wayne and Roxanne stepped into the diner everyone stopped and stared at them. Wayne ignored them and went to an empty booth, sinking down in the leather-seat with a huge sigh. 

He was so fucking confused, and tired, and ever since Megamind had left their fight he had this heavy feeling in his chest that he couldn’t shake off. Roxanne sat down opposite him and glanced around. Wayne hid his face in his hands and rested like that until the waitress came over to them. 

“W-what will it be, Metro Man?” she asked. Wayne didn’t move from his position. 

“Milkshake and fries,” he said. When had he had fries last? He couldn’t remember. 

“Uh, same,” said Roxanne and the waitress left as flustered as she had arrived. 

Wayne slowly lifted his head out of his hands and looked across the table. Roxanne looked bad. Her hair was a mess, her clothes rumbled, her heartbeat agitated. He could tell she was in pain. He could also tell she was ashamed and awkward. Whatever had happened since Wayne left Megamind’s lair before, Roxanne knew the details. 

He arranged the salt and pepper shakers on the table to have something to do and cleared his throat. “So… how about you start from when we last saw each other.” 

Roxanne winced but nodded. 

“Yeah, okay.” she said and pursed her lips. Then she told him everything; about Psycho Delic attacking Old Spice when Wayne had already left, how Lady Doppler and Hot Flash attacked the lair when Megamind rushed to Old Spice, how they threatened to kill Minion and Roxanne’s camera man if she didn’t do what they wanted. And she told him about the pictures. About how the Doom Syndicate had gotten a hold of them and had tried to blackmail Megamind with them. How Roxanne had broadcasted it out for the entirety of Metro City. 

Which lead to the fight Megamind and he had. Wayne felt awful. Megamind hadn’t done anything. It had all been Wayne; Wayne that had pushed him against the wall, Wayne who  _ felt _ these  _ urges _ . No wonder Megamind was pissed. 

_ “You fucking idiot, _ ” Megamind had said to him. Fucking idiot, indeed. 

“Why didn’t you tell me about the pictures before?” Wayne asked. “Maybe I could have done something, I could have — I could have tried to find and destroy them, or something.” 

Roxanne blushed and avoided his gaze. “I don’t know, it just — it skipped my mind.

“It was awkward enough when I talked with Megamind about them, and I kind of… I didn’t want to intrude on your… business.” 

Wayne groaned and rubbed his face. “Now it’s everyone’s business.” 

“You don’t know that,” Roxanne said reassuringly. “A lot of things happened today, Downtown, Old Spice — maybe people didn’t even see it.” 

They both ignored the fact that it had been broadcasted as an emergency-update, and that every TV turned to channel 8 at least had it interrupt their usual programming. 

They got their order, and were silent for a moment. Wayne stared at the food and carefully put some fries in his mouth. He didn’t burst into flames. 

Roxanne glanced at him, and he could tell she wanted to ask but was too polite to do so, so he sighed and took a sip from his milkshake. 

“It was just that once,” he said. “And Megamind don’t… he doesn’t feel the same way.” 

Roxanne was silent and ate a few fries. She nodded slowly. “Okay. But you — feel like… you’d want a relationship, or..?” 

Wayne sighed and looked out the window. 

He didn’t know the answer to that question. His life had turned into a rollercoaster ever since this whole thing started. First, Megamind had convinced him that Wayne wanted to  _ eat _ him, then Wayne  _ wanted _ him — now they were the same species, and they had just been outed to the entire city. 

Did Wayne want a relationship with Megamind? He wasn’t gay. His previous sexual experiences had been with women. But the thought of Megamind made his blood boil in a way he had never experienced before. 

He had enjoyed all his previous partners, of course he had. But sex wasn’t… well, he had had a lot of it, but in the same way he had consumed a lot of alcohol in his life, looking for something that would give him that ‘aha’-experience everyone else had. Some experiences were great, like the budding relationship — friends with benefits — Roxanne and he had had going for a while, before Wayne fucked it up, and Miriam, who he had dated for a few months fresh out of collage. Others were awful, like Paige, whom Wayne still wasn’t sure if he ever had officially broken up with, or just stopped responding to her calls and messages. 

The most recent that came to mind was Vanessa, who he had kissed in front of the bar before Megamind interrupted them. Kissing her, he had felt nothing except a mild disgust at the taste of her Halloween-makeup. 

“I don’t know,” he said honestly. “I’m not gay.” 

“Jesus Christ, Wayne, bisexuality exists,” Roxanne said, a bit of her usual humour back in her voice. Wayne blinked and looked at her. Roxanne gave him a piercing look and gestured to herself. “One’s sitting right here.” 

Wayne frowned and considered it. Bisexual. Could he be that? But he had never felt desire towards men before. Then again, had he felt a strong desire for women, either? All his relationships had happened because the girls took the first step, not Wayne. And most of the time, he had gotten more into it the better he got to know them. That’s why he thought Roxanne and he had been so good, because they had been friends long before they even slept together. 

“I don’t know,” Wayne said. “I mean, yeah, I know it exists, I just don’t know if it’s… me. And since Buddy don’t feel the same way, it doesn’t matter.” 

Roxanne frowned. “Your sexuality isn’t defined based on whether or not someone else wants you, it’s about how  _ you  _ feel. And it matters because  _ you _ matter, and you deserve to know yourself.” 

Wayne avoided her gaze and ate a few more French fries. 

“Hey, the news are back on,” suddenly someone from another booth shouted. “Turn up the sound!” 

Both Wayne and Roxanne turned to the TV just in time to see a news-clip in front of Old Spice come on. 

“The disruption on Old Spice is still ongoing,” the News anchor said, standing some distance away from the beginning of the district. There were a green smog filling the streets, making it impossible to see more than a few meters. 

Wayne wrestled down the guilt that bubbled up in him. He should go help, not sit here and eat French fries. 

“The cause of the smoke is still undetermined, but we’ve just received news that it is treated as a terrorist attack.” The news anchor continued, uncaring of Wayne’s personal feelings on the matter. “Rescue services have difficulty manoeuvring the smoke-filled streets, but Megamind’s brainbots have been coming in and out of the Old Spice for over an hour, and it appears they are bringing unconscious and wounded people trapped in Old Spice to the rescue workers. This footage was recorded just over an hour ago.”

The TV-screen flipped to another street, still in front of Old Spice. Megamind came down from the sky on his hoverbike. His face was set with determination. 

_ “Everyone that can still walk, take off your jackets or shirts and wear them as masks. Gather everyone that can’t walk on their own and take them to higher ground! Now!” _

The camera did a zoom-in on his face. Wayne saw people jump into action, doing as Megamind ordered and Megamind flew off into the smoke. The TV cut back to the news anchor. 

“As you can see, Megamind appears to be helping rescue-services. The wounded that have been rescued have been taken to Metro City Hospital, where their condition is stable, but critical. Authorities are hard at work finding a cause of the smoke as well as treatment for the wounded.” 

Wayne and Roxanne glanced at each other. 

“I should go help,” Wayne said. Roxanne put a hand on his over the table and stopped him from standing up. 

“Wayne, you look exhausted. When was the last time you slept?” 

Closing up on 72 hours now. Wayne ignored the question and shook his head. “People need help, Roxie.” 

“The brainbots  _ are _ helping,” said Roxanne sharply. Wayne pulled away from her. 

“I need to do something,” he said. 

“Wayne -” Roxanne said, but Wayne cut her off. 

“This is who I am, Roxie,” and then he flew off, hoping that if he went fast enough he could forget this entire day.

* * *

In Lair Two, Megamind got the power-generators up and running, then he put Minion in his spare-suit. It was an older model that required charging every fifteen hours, but Minion could move in it and that’s all that mattered. 

Megamind avoided looking at his friend when he was done, but marched over to a machine to start working on an antidote to Delic’s smog. Minion followed him and handed him his tools. Megamind took them and frowned. 

“About before…” said Minion. 

“I don’t want to talk about it,” said Megamind. “Ever.” 

“Please don’t be mad at Miss Ritchi,” Minion said, ignoring him. Megamind flinched and finally looked at him. The fish looked worried and determined at the same time, and Megamind knew he wouldn’t get peace until he allowed his friend to speak his mind. Megamind put down his tools and watched him. 

“Miss Ritchi had no other choice, she only did it to save my life, Sir. It anything, you should be mad at me for getting caught in the first place!” 

Megamind bit the inside of his cheek and considered it. 

He wasn’t mad at Minion. He wasn’t even mad at Roxanne. He was a little mad at Wayne, but most of all he was mad at himself. He was mad about everything, from losing his temper and attacking Wayne just now, to letting the feelings of the Doom Syndicate fester ‘til the point where they tried to usurp him; he was even mad at himself as a baby for surviving the doom of their species in the first place. 

Being mad was easier. Underneath the anger there was shame and sadness, and Megamind felt like he would suffocate if he let that come forth. So he was mad instead. 

But staring at Minion’s reddish eyes and earnest, sorrowful face, Megamind felt himself cracking. The air left him, and he felt shorter and smaller than he had for years. 

“I’m not mad,” he said, trying to keep the tremble in his voice as even as possible. “If anything, you should be mad at me for leaving you in the lair. That’s the only reason they even managed to hurt you and Roxanne to begin with.” 

His throat constricted and he swallowed down the painful lump.

“And it’s my fault we’re ruined.” he added, silently. Minion put his hand on his shoulder. 

“No Sir, it isn’t.” he said gently. 

“I’m the one kissing Metro Man,” Megamind argued. 

“Yes, but Metro Man is the only one left of your species,” said Minion and shook his head. “Maybe it’s only natural that you two would be drawn to each other.” 

Megamind made a face. Minion gave him a look. “You’ve always been obsessed with Metro Man, Sir.” 

“I have not!” Megamind exclaimed. Minion didn’t look like he believed him, but squeezed his shoulder again. 

“We’ll figure something out, Sir.” he said. “We always do.” 

Megamind swallowed and turned back to his work. First he needed to fix Old Spice. He might be destroyed as Metro City’s Overlord, but Old Spice and he had a deal. Megamind kept his promises. 

* * *

Metro City Hospital was a mess. It was chaos from the lobby up, and Megamind — disguised as Mitch — had to wait forever before he even got the chance to speak to someone working there. By now, several hours had passed since Delic’s attack, and the influx of people at the hospital; practically the entirety of Old Spice on top of the usual business, and not to mention people wounded by Destruction Worker’s attack, had caused a backlog worse than a Black Friday sale. 

He was starting to regret his decision not to come in with guns blazing, demanding to see everyone that had been exposed to Delic’s gas. It would have been  _ much _ quicker. 

It would have involved police as well, and Megamind just wasn’t feeling the sneers he was sure he’d receive from the officers if he was caught. If there was one thing Megamind knew it was that if you were poor, had a criminal record, another skin colour than white and/or queer, the police were not your friends. Megamind now fit into all those categories. Fucking Wayne. Fucking Doom Syndicate. 

“Excuse me,” said Megamind as Mitch, his voice much deeper than he was used to, to a nurse in the lobby that finally had a moment to spare. “I’m looking for my brother, Mitch Hayneswood. He was in the Old Spice.” 

The nurse, looking like he had been on his feet for days sighed like he had heard the same thing over and over again and punched in the name on the computer. He must have been tired, because he didn’t even ask for identification. “He’s in ward six, room 538.” 

“Thank you.” said Megamind and walked off. With the aid of the sample he had collected and brainbot 8300-r delivered, Megamind was pretty certain Minion and he had managed to reverse Delic’s work. Now he just needed a way to ensure everyone got treatment. But Mitch first. 

Megamind made his way to ward six and to Mitch’s room. He opened the door and peered in. It was a large room, filled with more people than should be allowed in it. Everything that could be used as a bed or stretcher was there, trying to accompany for the patients. Mitch, looking much worse for wear, was three beds in. He was sitting up, conscious, which Megamind was thankful for. He slipped in and walked over. 

Mitch turned towards him, and his dark eyes grew impossibly large. “What the -” 

Megamind pulled curtain-divider close to shield them, and turned off the glamour. Mitch relaxed and put a hand over his chest. 

“Goddamn it, Boss, don’t do that to me!” Mitch hissed, his voice rough. 

“Don’t be a baby,” said Megamind and looked in his medical chart. No administration of drugs from the hospital. Good. “How are you feeling?” 

“Feels like I’ve smoked five packs of cigarettes every day for the last 20 years.” 

“You really should quit that habit, cigarettes are bad for you,” said Megamind and grinned at him. Mitch coughed and tried to glare at him at the same time. 

“And you should become a comedian, Boss,” Mitch grumbled after his coughing-fit settled. “What did you do with Psycho Delic, then?” 

Megamind made a face but didn’t answer. He still had Delic as a little cube in one of his belt-pockets, and whenever he thought of it he felt like it was burning a hole through the leather. 

He knew it was a joint effort from the Doom Syndicate, but his rage was directed Delic’s way. Somehow the whole situation felt worse,  _ because _ Delic had distracted him with negotiations while the rest worked to de-throne him. That Delic  _ knew _ him well enough to know he would agree to negotiate instead of fighting, even when Delic had poisoned hundreds of people in the same breath… well, that felt sore. Megamind felt like a fool, dancing along someone else’s pipe. He hated that feeling. 

He hated not having control of his own life — not having control of how people perceived him. When he set out to become Metro City’s Overlord he had done so with the intent to be the baddest of the bad. He was  _ good _ at being bad, and so he made everyone see just how  _ good  _ at bad he could be. 

The best of Bad didn’t get tricked by second-rate villains to become the laughing-stock of their own city. They fought the best of the best — like Metro Man — and were untouchable by the low-scraping scum. 

“Boss?” Mitch asked, retrieving Megamind from his thoughts. He shook his head, put down Mitch’s chart and produced a vial and a syringe. Mitch eyed the needle and held out his arm. “Thank god, I’m going into withdrawal here.” 

“This isn’t smack, Mitch,” Megamind said and filled the needle carefully. “It’s the antidote for Delic’s smog.” 

“Couldn’t you at least bring me something?” Mitch whined. Megamind stabbed him with the needle and shot in the clear liquid. 

“No,” he said and applied a band aid. “I like you better when you’re sober.”

“That makes one of us,” Mitch mumbled, but settled down in his bed again. Megamind flipped his watch and turned back into Mitch.

“Rest,” Megamind said. Mitch eyed him oddly, but when he spoke his voice was gentle. 

“Thanks, Boss.” Megamind shrugged and pulled the curtain back again. The room was just as full of sick people, and he realized that there was no way he’d be able to go to every bed and inject them with the antidote. He needed a plan. 

* * *

Roxanne was in pain, but she was too worked up to go home. She needed to do  _ something _ . 

Except that she didn’t quite know what. She didn’t know where Megamind’s lair was; and based on what Minion had said before they wouldn’t even return there but go at Lair Two to regroup. Wayne had flown off to Old Spice, and Hal had fucking left her stranded in Downtown, so Roxanne was left with no choice but to walk wherever she wanted to go. 

This was a fucking mess. Roxanne had single-handedly exposed Megamind and Metro Man to the entire city. Megamind had honestly felt like leaving the city at the demand of the Doom Syndicate were better than what she had done. Roxanne swallowed down the lump she had stuck in her throat, but she still felt like shit. 

Worse than shit, because she fucking  _ was _ shit. 

God, exposing someone like that? That was fucking awful. Roxanne couldn’t even imagine how that felt. She had always been… well, she didn’t  _ hide _ her transness or her bisexuality, but she didn’t talk about it, either. The moment she started passing Roxanne leaned into that, and people stubbornly thought she was together with Metro Man, so it wasn’t like people asked why she didn’t have a boyfriend. She never had to mention that she didn’t have a girlfriend either because people didn’t even consider that an option. 

Maybe that was the coward’s way out. Abuse against trans people were through the roof; especially against trans women. Trans women of colour had it even worse. But goddamn it if Roxanne wasn’t also scared of rocking the boat. She had it good. She was on the news; she had her dream job, her dream apartment. The fact that she could put on her favourite dress and stand to report to the entire city had felt impossible when she was a kid. Just being  _ Roxanne _ had felt impossible. 

She never would have survived being forced out of the closet before she was ready, and now she had done it to Megamind and Wayne. 

What was she supposed to have done, though? Let Hot Flash boil Minion alive? 

No. That wasn’t even an option. Unfortunately, the only option left had been this horrible shit that she’d now have to live with — and somehow try to make up for. If Megamind would ever even speak to her again. 

Shit. 

Maybe she should actually go to the hospital. Her head was really starting to hurt, and she was sure there were some physical problems with being shot by lightning. With a sigh, Roxanne started walking. 

* * *

The opportunity he had been waiting for arose around fifteen minutes later when Megamind, disguised as a nurse, got into the laboratory. It was hectic, full of doctors and nurses working overtime so no one noticed him when he pulled out his de-gun. Someone  _ did  _ notice him when he flipped off his disguise and became Megamind, incredibly handsome criminal genius and master of all villainy. 

A man in a doctors coat screamed, and Megamind pointed his gun randomly at them. “Alright, put your hands in the air.” 

Some did, others ducked under tables. One woman, who Megamind assumed was in charge, pushed her head up and gave a start. 

“What do you think you’re doing?” the woman said in outrage and gestured around. “We’re trying to save lives!” 

“Wonderful,” Megamind said. “Then I suggest you lead me to your analysis-machine, preferably before  _ he  _ -” here Megamind pointed his weapon at a man who looked like he was going to play hero, “hurts himself trying to rush me.” 

For a second nothing happened. Humans and their damned slow thought process. 

“Now!” Megamind shouted. The woman in charge gestured to another room, and Megamind wriggled his gun that way.

“Get in,” he said to their leader, and after she stepped in he followed and locked the door. He heard the room break out in panic behind him, but he ignored it. Megamind stepped over to the analysis-machine and added his own antidote to it, then a couple of chemicals that would turn the liquid airborne.

“What is the meaning of this?” the doctor demanded. 

“Well, Dr..?” 

“Mardling,” the woman replied. Megamind started the machine and watched it spin the different liquids together at high speed. 

“Dr Mardling, I’m synthesizing the antidote to become airborne,” Megamind said calmly.

“What?” Dr Mardling said. Megamind shrugged. 

“I need to distribute it as widely as possible as quickly as possible to get everyone, and in its liquid form injection just takes too long.” Megamind shrugged. “And considering I have about two minutes and 35 seconds to do it before the guards show up, it needs to go quick.” 

“You have the antidote?” the doctor gasped and stepped over, staring at the machine working. “Then why didn’t you-?” 

They looked at each other. Megamind gestured to his body. It’s not like anyone in their right mind would have distributed something Megamind handed over to them. 

“Ah,” said the doctor. Megamind nodded to a vent in the ceiling. 

“Is that the central air?” he asked. The doctor glanced that way. 

“I… think so.” she said. 

“Great,” said Megamind as the machine turned green. “You might want to take a deep breath, I imagine everyone not infected will get quite nauseous” 

“What -” the doctor meekly protested, but by then Megamind had shot the machine. Along with his blast, a chemical reaction occurred which caused the blue smoke to quickly fill up the room, just like Delic’s own. Megamind watched the air vent start to suck the smoke in while the machine kept puff out more and more smoke. 

Dr Mardling started coughing besides him. Megamind slipped on his gas mask and looked around. Now he needed a way out, and he didn’t dare break a window in case that would dilute the smoke. 

So running it was. Wonderful. Megamind took a steadying breath, turned back to the door and opened it. He shot the first person to rush him, then ducked and swiped the second. The guards hadn’t showed up yet, which was good. Trigger-happy humans got people shot. People that happened to stand to close to Megamind when the bullets bounced off his forcefield. 

Megamind leaped into action, rushed to the door to the lab and forced it open. He heard people running from the left, so he took a right and ran until he reached the stairs. He jumped down the first flight, then ran the next. As he ran he twisted his watch and turned into the first best disguise — which turned out to be the Warden. 

He would have laughed if he hadn’t been busy. 

An alarm started sounding; if it was in response to him or the smoke he didn’t know. Megamind sprinted the last way and practically tossed himself out through the doors. A woman with a little poodle on a leash gasped in shock — probably thinking that the old man who had just burst himself out through the hospital was going to have a heart attack. Megamind glanced at her and shrugged. 

“Sorry, hypochondriac,” he said and ran past her and her ugly dog. When he reached the block away from the hospital he stopped and flipped his watch again. 

“Freeze, Megamind!” someone shouted. Megamind glanced up, and realized he had just run into Metro City Police. 

Fuck. 

“Some other time, perhaps,” Megamind said and did not lower his gun. “I am  _ extremely _ busy right now.” 

“Get down on the ground!” a cop shouted. Megamind recognized him as someone who  _ loved _ trying to shoot him, and often pushed him around if he got to be in during an arrest. His name was Hewitt, or something else hard fucking thing to pronounce.

Of course, it’s this asshole, Megamind thought, because things were never just easy for him. 

“We have a code Blue:ten,” another officer shouted into the radio. Code Blue meant Megamind, ten meant Megamind resisting arrest. 

“I am serious,” Megamind said with a sigh. “Turn around and pretend this never happened, or I’m going to shoot you.” 

Why Megamind wasn’t shooting them already had to do with that the street was already crowded with people, and bullets bounced off of him. The moment he shot the first one, at least eight other cops would fire before he could cube ‘em, and last time he had been under fire four people had been taken to the hospital in critical condition. 

And no one ever said it was the police’s fault for shooting when they knew it wouldn’t hit, no, it was always Megamind’s fault. Megamind’s fault people got shot by trigger-happy police; Megamind’s fault that the people of Old Spice got poisoned; Megamind’s fault that sales were low; Megamind’s fault that Delic couldn’t even regulate his own product so people didn’t fucking over-dose and die on it; Megamind’s fault that he didn’t fucking die when he was supposed to but just had to survive! 

“I said get down on the ground, you fucking faggot!” Hewitt shouted. 

Megamind closed his eyes. Goddamn it. 

He shot Hewitt first, and then the hail of bullets started. Megamind crouched, making himself as small as he could and shot one, two, three cops. He saw a bystander go down with a bounce, but the bullet went into the leg. People were screaming. 

Megamind rolled, shot the rest of the police, and rushed over to the wounded civilian. He forced her hand away from the wound and jerked out another of his inventions, an insta-stop that would slow down the bleeding. 

He shot that into the wound and looked at the woman. 

“Do you have anyone to take you to the hospital?” he asked. The woman stared at him, then nodded. 

“My wife,” she whispered. There was a woman next to her, so Megamind just nodded and stood. 

“Go now,” he ordered, then twisted around and caught sight of Roxanne Ritchi. They stared at each other for a moment. Roxanne took a step towards him, Megamind took a step back. 

He couldn’t deal with this right now. Megamind twisted around and ran, past the cop-cars, away from Roxanne. Unfortunately she was running after him, and she wasn’t faring so well. He glanced back and could see she was struggling. He could outrun her. But she also looked to be in so much pain, and he didn’t know if he should leave her. 

“Fucking hell,” Megamind cursed, stopped running and turned to face her. Roxanne stopped immediately and bent down, breathing heavily. 

“Oh, thank god,” she murmured through pained gasps. 

“What are you doing, Miss Ritchi?” Megamind demanded. 

“I needed to — speak with you…” Roxanne panted. Megamind crossed his arms and observed her, unimpressed. 

“You look like you should be in the hospital,” he said. 

Roxanne forced herself up and glared at him, but her cheeks were flushed and her eyes looked pale, almost like she had a fever. 

“That was where I was going.” she said. 

“Well this is the wrong way,” Megamind said. Roxanne hesitated, then she put on a determined expression and set her jaw. 

“Take me with you, I want to help.” 

“Help what?” Megamind snapped. 

“With everything!” Roxanne snapped back. She glared at him, but then her expression changed and it became almost pleading. “Please, I want to — I  _ need _ to help.” 

Megamind looked at her, then he glanced back the way they had come. Any second back-up would arrive on site, and Megamind needed to make himself scarce. 

“Oh,  _ alright _ ,” he said and grabbed Roxanne’s arm. He started pulling her along. Roxanne went willingly, and at one point she actually leaned on him, so she must be in worse pain than Megamind realized. 

“What are we going to do about the Doom Syndicate?” Roxanne asked. Megamind winced. 

“ _ We _ are not going to do anything.” he said. 

“We’re just going to let them get away with everything?” Roxanne demanded. Her anger made him want to pull back in on himself. He wanted to be angry like that, but he had used it up on Wayne, and now he felt… well, he didn’t know what he felt. He felt defeated. He felt destroyed. 

So many years of hard work flushed down in the drain. His empire.

He had even thought he’d give  _ anything _ for a sliver of knowledge of his own people. Megamind had honestly thought he’d give up his empire for it. But he hadn’t known what that knowledge was. He hadn’t known it was Wayne; that it was  _ this _ . But it was, and now his empire was gone. For nothing. For the most hollow victory Megamind had ever experienced. 

Well, Megamind was ready to give up. He didn’t give a shit any more. He had always had no family, no hope, no future. He had made it to 35, and honestly, that was 35 years longer than he was supposed to. Tossing in the towel now was more than deserved. He’d  _ earned _ to give up. Metro City had never wanted him, neither the law-abiding nor the law-breaking side, and yet he had stayed. He had  _ never _ left the city limit. 

He had given it his all. The baddest of the bad. 

Sure, he never got to eliminate the most powerful man in the universe, but no one is perfect. And who was he kidding, Metro Man was Fate’s favourite. Nothing could eliminate him. 

“Megamind?” Roxanne asked. Megamind shrugged. 

“I don’t know, Roxanne,” he said defeatedly. Because Megamind was defeated. “Maybe you can report a scoop on them or something.” 

That was… not what Roxanne wanted to hear. He could tell. She squinted at him and frowned, and Megamind shifted his weight uncomfortably. Roxanne’s blue eyes could see through anything. It was one of the most impressive qualities she had; her deductive skills. 

“First we need to see if the antidote works,” Megamind said. Roxanne brightened. 

“You have an antidote?” she asked. 

“Why do you think I’m here in the first place?” Megamind said and rolled his eyes. “I just released it like a gas in the hospital.” 

“That’s… efficient.” said Roxanne. Megamind shrugged. 

“Hopefully everyone who works there don’t get too effected by it.” 

“Uh huh,” Roxanne said doubtfully. Megamind gave her a look. 

“Oh, shut up.” 

“I didn’t say anything!” 

“Your face did.” 

“Is Minion alright?” Roxanne asked. The change of subject threw Megamind for a loop. 

What would Minion say to giving up? He hadn’t even thought about that. Minion wasn’t a give-up kind of fish. Megamind supposed there was nothing incriminating Minion, after all. Minion didn’t have to give up. Minion could stay in business. That actually made Megamind relieved, because it probably meant that Minion could rebuild some of what Megamind had created. He didn’t have to leave it in ruins, just… covered in ashes waiting to be dusted off. 

“Minion’s fine,” Megamind reassured her. Roxanne relaxed. 

“You know I never would have done it if it wasn’t for Hot Flash — she threatened to kill him.” Roxanne turned her blue eyes at him again, and they were huge and sorrowful. For a second he actually felt flattered that she cared so much for Minion. He nodded shakily. 

“You did the right thing,” he said. Megamind would have done the same for Minion. In a heartbeat. 

He took Roxanne into a side-alley and opened the backdoor to Lair Two, then ushered them both inside. 

“Minion!” Megamind shouted. “Miss Ritchi requires medical attention!” 

Minion appeared, looking surprised before his face split up. 

“Miss Ritchi!” he greeted cheerfully and rushed over to help her. Megamind shifted her weight to Minion and took a step back. He observed them as Minion ushered her to the medical bay, and once he was sure they were both preoccupied he went over to the monitors and watched how the antidote was working. 

He was pretty sure he was right, and he only needed to observe for a few minutes before he saw signs of improvement in the victims. 

Good. 

Megamind shifted around in a drawer until he found some paper and a pen, then he picked out the cube that was Delic and placed it down on the paper. He wrote in big letters  _ PSYCHO DELIC, _ and then he circled the cube for good measure. 

Minion would make a good decision about it, he was sure. 

Megamind strapped his de-gun to his belt, took a converter, so he’d be able to charge is suit, and left Lair Two. Everything he really needed was in Lair One anyway. 

* * *

Megamind got the back-up generators up and running. Lady Doppler had fried just about every computer, but there were still some working machines available. The first thing he fixed was getting his tracker out of his arm. Minion would follow him otherwise, and he didn’t… he couldn’t take Minion down with him. 

Megamind was the one who was ruined, but Minion still had a chance. Megamind was sure he’d blossom into a wonderful villain once he got used to the spotlight. He was always the one who understood the importance of presentation, after all, so he already had that going for him. 

And also, Megamind wanted to wallow in his own misery. Minion would be all like,  _ ‘it’s no one’s fault, sir’ _ and  _ ‘maybe you should try and reconnect with Metro Man Sir, considering he’s the last of your species.’  _

Fuck that. It was someone’s fault. It was Megamind’s; and Metro Man’s; and the Doom Syndicate’s. He was not ready to give up the blame over  _ anything _ about this. 

Megamind sliced a clinical cut into him, then used pliers to pull out the little tracker. He didn’t destroy it, because that would set off an alarm. Instead he placed it carefully down in a bowl and put a band-aid into his arm. 

Once that was done, he walked over to Metro Man’s pod and considered it for a second. Did he need the information? Downloading it would take a long time, and he wasn’t sure he’d have a computer sophisticated enough to run it even if he did, so eventually he walked away from it. 

He shoved down clothes in a bag, packed food, some tools, his toothbrush. What else did you need when you were running away from your biggest failure? 

Money, perhaps. Megamind went to the safe and shoved down about fifteen bundles, but he didn’t know if 150 000 dollars was good enough. He had no idea how much  _ stuff _ cost — Minion usually did the shopping. He could always steal some more if he ran out, he supposed. Or just steal whatever he needed was probably a better idea. 

FBI tended to get involved if you stole too much cash, but if you stole toothpaste or clothes? Eh. And Megamind did not need FBI on his trail. It was bad enough that they were probably salivating over the thought of his alien body any day of the week, he didn’t need them actively trying to get him for a bank-heist, too. 

He downloaded a couple of scans down on his watch, then chose the friendliest-looking one; a twenty-five-ish white guy with blond hair and a polo-shirt. People loved white guy and polo shirt. 

Megamind looked around his lair. He had  _ built _ this. He had been  _ someone _ , even if he had to fight tooth and nail to become it. Not even the Doom Syndicate could take that away from him. Metro City  _ would _ talk about him. Yes, they’d end the story with how he crashed and burned, but damn what a story it would be before that. 

Megamind sighed, hoisted his backpack over his shoulder, and left for the bus stop. 

Once he finally arrived at the station, Megamind stood in front of the bus board and watched all the places he could go for a while. All the options were a little overwhelming. Most busses went to the towns over, but a few were going further away. There was a bus going in fifteen minutes that could take him to St. Louis, and there it ought to be busses there that could take him even further. 

Megamind had never been to St. Louis. He’d never been anywhere, really. Unless he counted the Glaupunkt-quadrant, and he didn’t, because the Glaupunkt-quadrant was destroyed. Gone. Dead. 

He had never felt a need to leave. The thought that he  _ could _ have never even occurred to him. Megamind and Metro City was match made in hell, but Megamind hadn’t even entertained the notion of going somewhere else. 

Neither had Metro Man, unless there was a disaster that required his attention. He’d gone to the local collage, even though he could have gone legacy to Princeton, where Lord Scott had gone, or to Harvard, where Lady Scott had gone. 

Collage had never been in the cards for Megamind, so he’d never even dreamt of going. When he had been collage-age it wasn’t like he could afford it, and he didn’t have the grades for it either. Megamind was a high-school drop-out. The Warden had always said he had a problem with authority — usually when he was trying to implement some kind of authority  _ on _ Megamind; and besides, Megamind couldn’t really imagine that there was anything someone would be able to teach him that he didn’t already know at that point, so he had started his villain-career instead. 

Megamind bought a ticket to St. Louis, then stepped onto the bus and found himself a seat in the back. 

Minion would be devastated, of course. He would probably have liked St. Louis. But Megamind wasn’t about to force his best friend to leave the only life he had ever known on account of Megamind’s own stupidity, so he shoved that thought deep down and glared out of the window. 

A mom and her daughter sat on the seats opposite him in the aisle. 

“Hi,” the girl said. Confused, Megamind realized she was talking to him. 

“Hi?” he said. She smiled, which showed off a missing tooth. 

“I’m Carrie, what’s your name?” 

“M — Buddy.” Megamind said and inwardly winced. The girl laughed. 

“We’re gonna see my Nana and Poppa.” The mom gave Megamind an apologetic look. 

“That’s… exciting.” Megamind said. Carrie watched him thoughtfully. 

“What are you gonna do?” 

“Carrie, leave the man alone,” the mother said. Carrie pouted. Megamind frowned and looked back out the window. 

Buddy. Hadn’t he left Buddy Wardens behind when he became Megamind? He sighed and tried to get comfortable. 

The bus started and rolled out from the station. Megamind watched the buildings roll by in silence. The bus smelled weird, and the more they drove, the weirder it started to smell. Kind of tasted weird, too. 

He hoped St. Louis would taste less weird. 

* * *

Wayne was finishing with Old Spice when he got the call that Megamind had apparently released some kind of toxin in the hospital, so of course he went there. Once there, a Dr Mardling had told him that  _ Megamind _ had told  _ her _ that the toxin in reality was the antidote, and as far as she could tell Megamind was spot-on. The victims were starting to recover at rapid speed. 

Then Wayne heard that Megamind had run into the police a block away, and that all had been turned into cubes. One woman had been shot in the leg as well, but she was stable and would be fine, so obviously he went to the scene, too. Except that there wasn’t a need for him. 

Megamind had long since left, and Wayne was tired, and even the police gave him odd looks. Kind of caught between disbelief and disgust, which was weird. 

Wayne was going home, because this clusterfuck of a day couldn’t get more weird. He flew home, switched into his bathrobe and made himself a sandwich. 

Roxanne’s question kept bouncing around in his head. Did he want a relationship with Megamind? 

Well… the scent of Megamind’s blood was one of the hottest, sexiest things he had ever smelled. Scents were a big thing for Wayne, and being turned on by his blood-scent was better than wanting to eat him. Which Wayne was pretty sure Megamind was disappointed over, because of course Megamind would have loved the idea of Metro Man wanting to eat him. 

Like — Megamind was… cute. Or, cute perhaps wasn’t the right word for it. Megamind was fascinating. Megamind was smart, and infuriating, and dangerous and brutal, and funny and resourceful. Megamind was just  _ more _ that Wayne would explain with words. Yes, he was attractive. Big eyes and skinny body; the kind that Wayne could wrap himself around and feel like he was protecting all of it. 

But a relationship? He could barely talk civilly with Megamind if they were alone. They always needed someone there to broker between them, otherwise everything went to hell. 

Megamind would open his mouth and drag Wayne into an argument, and Wayne would feel alive and excited trying to out-wit him, and they could go on for ages if no one stopped them and — oh my god, Wayne was in love with Megamind! 

Wayne stopped everything. The sandwich was left halfway to his mouth. He stopped breathing. Mustard was dripping down on the floor. 

Wayne was  _ in love _ with Megamind. 

He didn’t just — he wanted to — he wanted  _ Megamind _ . He wanted to fuck Megamind, and he wanted to impress Megamind. He wanted Megamind’s attention, and he got jealous when he didn’t get it, and he had been  _ obsessed _ with Megamind for years — longer than Wayne could actually justify his obsession. 

Yeah, he had been a dick to Megamind when they were kids, because Megamind scared him. Megamind wanted to talk about things Wayne was not ready to hear yet, and it had petrified him, but it had also made him giddy to have his attention. Wayne had taught himself how to play the ukulele when Megamind said that he liked music, for crying out loud! 

Okay, calm down, Wayne. What did he do with this knowledge? 

Attraction was one thing,  _ want _ was one thing.  _ In love _ was something else entirely. Especially since Megamind was  _ not _ in love with him. 

_ “You can’t keep your biological fucking urges to yourself,” _ Megamind had screamed at him.  _ “Not Metro Mahn, Metro Mahn  _ have _ to have  _ everything _ he wants!” _

And Wayne wanted Megamind. He wanted to know where he was, what he did and who he met. He had justified those urges for years, because he needed to know if Megamind was in jail or out; if he was plotting or causing destruction; if he met other villains or criminals. They were so entwined with everything that was Wayne’s life that he couldn’t tell if they were a natural response to the fact that he had grown up with a guy who became a supervillain and proclaimed Wayne his arch-nemesis, or if they came from the desire to  _ have _ Megamind. 

And that thought was sick, wasn’t it? You didn’t  _ have _ people. You didn’t own them. You didn’t force yourself into every aspect of their life; their routines. 

_ “You can’t  _ help _ me.”  _ Megamind had said. Because Wayne was Megamind’s entire fucking problem. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Dr Mardling is AwfulLawful's character, and I just stuffed her in because I didn't want to name a random doctor.
> 
> As always, comments are so greatly appreciated, and I'm sorry that this update have taken so long. I got sucked into a Teen Wolf hyperfixation, but I will finish this fic, don't you worry!

**Author's Note:**

> Please leave a comment if you enjoyed!


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